Dr. Gregory Bottaro

Being Human

A Christianity , Religion & Spirituality and Health & Fitness podcast

About the show

At the CatholicPsych Institute, we're doing something new when it comes to therapy. In the Being Human podcast, Dr. Greg Bottaro, Founder and Director of the CatholicPsych Institute, shares with you his vision for Catholic therapy and a revolutionary approach that is focused, finally, on what it means to be human.

Newest episodes

Franciscan Priest: What No Family Really Costs

Nov 10, 2026 2 hr 16 min Video

Does a priest ever grieve the family he gave up? Fr. Luke Joseph Leighton answers that question, and explains why he'd say yes again. Today, Dr. Greg Bottaro sits down in person with Fr. Luke, the friend he entered the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal with 22 years ago. Fr. Luke shares how the son of a Jewish father and a Catholic mother became a Franciscan priest, how his grandmother, who fled Nazi Germany as a child, came to bless his vocation, and what celibacy, poverty and obedience have actually cost him. Then they take on what Fr. Luke hears in the confessional about online outrage and the Church. Fr. Luke is a priest of the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal. Raised in Red Bank, New Jersey, he entered the Church at 15 after a conversion in high school. He spent fifteen years serving with the friars in New York City, including at Saint Anthony's Shelter for Renewal and Cardinal Spellman High School, and was ordained by Cardinal Dolan at St. Patrick's Cathedral in 2013. He is a trained spiritual director through the Institute for Priestly Formation. FOLLOW FR. LUKE: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0CmGPiEwgLZUVhJvcqFecA Franciscan Friars of the Renewal: https://cfr-newmexico.com/ DR. GREG'S BOOKS: The Power of Listening Well: https://sophiainstitute.com/product/the-power-of-listening-well/ The Personalist Cure (join the waitlist): https://catholicpsych.com/personalistcure CatholicPsych Store: https://bookshop.catholicpsych.com/ WORK WITH CATHOLICPSYCH: Find a Catholic mentor: https://catholicpsych.com/mentorship Learn to accompany the people you love (CPMAP): https://catholicpsych.com/cpmapinfo Free Anxiety Languages Quiz: https://catholicpsy.ch/quiz WATCH NEXT: A Bishop's Raw Story of Anxiety and Depression: https://youtu.be/yNdAMIQblDU MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: ▸ Mother Mary Francis, PCC, A Right to Be Merry ▸ Fr. Brett Brannen, To Save a Thousand Souls ▸ Viktor Frankl and St. Maximilian Kolbe ▸ Henri Nouwen on the three tempta...

Encore: Dating Well

Nov 3, 2026 58 min

If you're serious about marriage, you're supposed to take every date seriously. But walk into a first date asking whether this is the person God is calling you to marry, and you'll crush it before it starts. Dating isn't a test you pass. It's a discernment you learn by doing. To celebrate 300 episodes of Being Human, Dr. Greg revisits the third of our three most-listened-to episodes: his conversation with Dr. Mario Sacasa about dating well, and how Dr. Greg had to stop worrying about what his dates thought of him before he could really see them. Key Topics: Why treating a first date like a lifetime decision is the fastest way to crush it Why sharing the same faith doesn't automatically make you compatible Why constant fighting over small things isn't a cross God is asking you to carry What a first date can reveal about narcissism: who does the talking, and how they treat the waiter Why ghosting feels like kindness but is really a failure of courage Why you can't really see your date until you stop worrying about what they think of you Why a relationship that ends can still be a success Learn More: Dr. Mario Sacasa's resources: Dating Well, his online course for Catholic singles and couples Always Hope, the podcast hosted by Dr. Mario More from Dr. Mario at drmariosacasa.com Watch Dr. Greg's 7 Catholic Rules for Online Dating That Actually Work The Coddling of the American Mind by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt Pew Research Center: Key takeaways on Americans' views of and experiences with dating and relationships Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261 Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Encore: A Bishop's Raw Story of Anxiety and Depression

Oct 27, 2026 1 hr 0 min

When it's tough, you just work harder. Bishop James Conley lived by that rule until it cost him his sleep and his joy. What finally brought him back wasn't trying harder. It was surrender. For the second of our three most-listened-to episodes, Dr. Greg revisits his conversation with Bishop Conley about asking the Pope's representative for a leave of absence, and what he gained by being willing to lose it all. Key Topics: Why "just try harder" can deepen anxiety and depression instead of curing them Why the hardest part of asking for help can be the fear that you'll never be trusted again Why the more you have to lose, the harder it is to be honest about what you're carrying Why believing you're the only one struggling is what keeps you struggling alone Why the answer to an anxious generation may be more play, not more screens Why your weakness, not your talent, may be where God works most powerfully Learn More: Pastoral letters by Most Reverend James D. Conley, STL, Bishop of Lincoln: A Future with Hope (on mental health) The Joy and Wonder of Catholic Education: Developing Authentically Catholic Schools Resources recommended by Bishop Conley: Surrender Novena The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt Catechesis of the Good Shepherd Catholic Medical Association Catholic Healthcare Leadership Alliance Familiaris Consortio (The Christian Family in the Modern World) Ex Corde Ecclesiae (On Catholic Universities) Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

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All episodes

The newest 50 of 305 episodes

Franciscan Priest: What No Family Really Costs

Nov 10, 2026 2 hr 16 min Video

Encore: Dating Well

Nov 3, 2026 58 min

Encore: A Bishop's Raw Story of Anxiety and Depression

Oct 27, 2026 1 hr 0 min

Encore: Do You Know There Are 5 Anxiety Languages?

Oct 20, 2026 27 min

Which anxiety language do you speak? To celebrate 300 episodes of Being Human, we're bringing back one of your all-time favorites. Dr. Greg walks through the five anxiety languages (reactive, activated, minimizing, withdrawing, and impulsive) and shows why none of these parts is the enemy. Once they're let off the hook, they can become gifts. Key Topics: Why snapping at people, staying busy, or shrugging "this is fine" can all be anxiety, even if you'd never call yourself anxious Why being "always on" can pass for ambition when it's really running from an inner voice that says you'll fail Why pulling back and procrastinating are often your nervous system bracing for a threat, not laziness How anxiety can look like ADHD: the half-organized closet, the car you can't drive, the bathroom you never finished How each part, once it's let off the hook, can become alertness, motivation, peace, or spirit-led creativity Learn More: What's your primary anxiety language? Take the free Anxiety Languages Quiz: https://catholicpsy.ch/quiz Catholic Mindfulness Virtual Retreat: eight weeks of daily videos to help you work with your anxiety language Blog article: Is Mindfulness Safe for Catholics to Practice? The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Being Human Together: Celebrating 300 Episodes and What God Can Do with a Little Faith

Oct 13, 2026 1 hr 17 min

It's pretty wild: Being Human has reached episode 300. Dr. Greg gathered his friends to celebrate, and the celebration quietly became an example of what this show has been saying all along — being human can't be done alone. Dr. Greg is joined by Dr. Bryan Violette and his wife Teresa, along with Dr. Gerard McNicholas, to look back on 300 episodes of the podcast. Then a simple question about Teresa's new hobby opens into something far more personal, and gives a first taste of what comes next: Being Human Together. Key Topics: Why what you start in faith rarely turns out to be what you thought you were building Why the thing you're most upset about is often standing in for a grief you haven't named yet How a hobby you'd rather not talk about can be the most honest thing about you right now Why the people closest to you can sometimes see your grief before you do Why your favorite song can make you feel completely understood — and strangely alone when you share it How art slips past the part of you that would rather explain a feeling than feel it Learn More: Past episodes remembered in this conversation: Where it all started: Ep. #1: The Beginning Ep. #225: Humility, Time Travel and Philosophy with Peter Kreeft — Dr. Greg's favorite Ep. #102: ADHD and Me, w/ Teresa Violette Ep. #231: Music as Accompaniment: Matt Maher and a Mission to Heal through Song Ep. #172: A Journey through Faith and Music with John Michael Talbot Ep. #291: OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary: Why Real Change Happens through Love not Willpower The CatholicPsych Show — the live news show Dr. Greg and Dr. Bryan hosted Dr. Greg on The Lila Rose Show St. John Paul II's Letter to Artists The Personalist Cure by Dr. Greg Bottaro Missed the Summit of Integration? Catch the replays, including Christopher West's keynote on the Feast of St. John Paul II Need help? Schedule a free CatholicP...

10,000 Free Books and an 'Impossible' Edit: Launching The Personalist Cure

Oct 6, 2026 1 hr 9 min

Dr. Greg thought the draft was good. A year later, he called it "terrible." That's how a book ends up taking almost ten years to write. With The Personalist Cure finally launching, Dr. Greg sits down with his good friend Dr. Bryan Violette for a conversation that circles back on itself the way John Paul II's own writing does. Along the way, they get to the heart of the book: the difference between love that controls and love that sets free. Key Topics: Why so much of what passes for love is really a compulsive effort to get your own needs met What emancipating love looks like: willing the good of the other for their sake, even when it costs you Why the love Jesus shows on the cross changes how you see every relationship in your life What John Paul II meant by mutual submission in marriage — and why it's the opposite of control Learn More: The Personalist Cure by Dr. Greg Bottaro — the book behind this episode, almost ten years in the making Join us at the Summit of Integration in Dallas, October 20–23, celebrating the Feast of St. John Paul II (virtual tickets available) Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Your Working Genius: Exploring What the Grind Reveals About Your Gifts

Sep 29, 2026 48 min

You've been called lazy. Maybe you've been told you're just bad at your job. But what if that was never the problem at all — what if you've simply been sitting in the wrong seat? Dr. Greg sits down with his good friend Dr. Bryan Violette to explore what the Working Genius reveals about the work that drains us. Along the way, they make the case that even the parts of us we're most embarrassed by are usually protecting something good: our dignity. Key Topics: Why the task that grinds you down says more about your gifts than about your character Why "you're lazy" is usually the wrong story — and "wrong seat on the bus" is often the right one What "adaptive narcissism" is actually protecting Why shame doesn't produce lasting change — it just teaches you to hide better Why "I'm not myself today" gets it wrong, and why curiosity about the part that just showed up works better Why giving yourself away fills you up, even though handing over your coffee only leaves you with an empty cup Learn More: Join us at the Summit of Integration in Dallas, October 20–23, celebrating the Feast of St. John Paul II (virtual tickets available) The 6 Types of Working Genius by Patrick Lencioni — the framework Dr. Greg and Dr. Bryan discuss throughout the episode Gaudium et Spes — the Vatican II constitution behind "Christ reveals man to himself" and finding ourselves through a sincere gift of self Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Throwing Darts in the Dark: What Happens When Psychology and Education Forget What a Human Person Is

Sep 22, 2026 1 hr 1 min

Psychology is supposed to be a hard science with clear answers about what's healthy. It isn't — and when the people forming our kids can't say what a human being actually is, even their best work turns into darts thrown in the dark. Dr. Greg sits down with Dr. Brett Salkeld — host of the Making Every Class Catholic podcast — to trace what psychology and education both get wrong when they skip the question of what a person is for, and why the schools racing hardest to keep up with technology may not be the ones still standing in five years. Key Topics: Why psychology has no agreed-on standard for mental health — and what that gap is doing to real kids in real classrooms Why you have to know what a healthy human being is before you can help one heal How one true principle about the human person let Dr. Greg call the phone crisis in 2014 — years before the data caught up Why a phone doesn't connect two people so much as stand between them — and who profits from keeping it there Why the schools racing hardest to keep up with technology may be the ones that don't exist in five years What actually makes a school worth attending once AI can hand a kid any fact for free Learn More: Dr. Brett Salkeld's podcast: Making Every Class Catholic — bringing the Catholic faith into every subject in the classroom Educating for Eternity: A Teacher's Companion for Making Every Class Catholic by Dr. Brett Salkeld Love and Responsibility by Karol Wojtyła (St. John Paul II) Duc in Altum Schools Collaborative — the Catholic-schools network where Dr. Greg first met Dr. Salkeld Join us at the Summit of Integration in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II The Personalist Cure — Dr. Greg's new book, launching this October at the Summit Sign up for our newsletter Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

A Saint in the Subconscious: JP2 and the Search for the Human Person

Sep 15, 2026 1 hr 0 min

John Paul II is the most important psychologist of the twentieth century — and almost no one knows it. In three dense paragraphs on the subconscious, he named what Freud got wrong and gave us a fuller picture of the human person. Dr. Greg sits down with Fr. Randy Sly to trace how a pilgrimage through Poland turned a philosopher he'd studied for twenty-five years into a father he'd finally met — and why that kind of encounter, not more theory, is what integration actually asks of us. Key Topics: What John Paul II saw about the subconscious that Freud missed entirely Why studying a saint for twenty-five years isn't the same as actually meeting him How explaining integration can be the very thing that keeps you from it Why you don't have to be in crisis to need help becoming who you're meant to be What it means to be a channel instead of a closed loop — and why receiving isn't optional if you want to keep giving Learn More: Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II The Personalist Cure — Dr. Greg's upcoming book, launching this October at the Summit Sign up for our newsletter Fr. Randy Sly's podcast: The Follow to Lead Podcast Integration Pilgrimages — the encounter-focused pilgrimage Dr. Greg helped lead this summer Practice Catholic mindfulness to find the presence of God in the moment Go deeper in the integrated life through the Integrated Life app and community John Paul II on the subconscious: Person and Act and Related Essays by Karol Wojtyła Duc in Altum Schools Collaborative Black Elk Healing Retreat (Wyoming) Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

God Threw My Journal into a River: A Conversation on Love and Freedom from the Streets of Zakopane, Poland

Sep 8, 2026 47 min

You can become who you are. Which means you can also become who you're not. Recorded on location in Poland during a pilgrimage through the life of John Paul II, Dr. Greg Bottaro and Dr. Gerard McNicholas trace JP2's line "let yourself be molded by love" — and what happens in the subconscious that blocks our freedom to choose it. Key Topics: Why "become who you are" carries a hidden warning — you can also be molded into who you're not Why virtue never becomes automatic, no matter how many years you practice it How the one freedom no one can take from you is the freedom St. Maximilian Kolbe used to step forward and say "take my place" Why the buried things in your subconscious actually want to be known — and why John Paul II called surfacing them a task of morality How art slips in the back door of the subconscious and unlocks what analysis alone can't reach Learn More: Person and Act and Related Essays by Karol Wojtyła (John Paul II) — his account of conscience and the subconscious Our God's Brother — the Wojtyła play that gives us "let yourself be molded by love" Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk John Paul II's Letter to Artists The Personalist Cure — Dr. Greg's upcoming book, launching this October at the Summit Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

When "Figuring It All Out" Is the Problem: A College Senior Speaks About an Uncertain Future

Sep 1, 2026 1 hr 33 min

Not knowing what comes after graduation feels like failing. It's not. The real problem is the pressure to have it all figured out. Dr. Greg sits down with college senior Sandy Napolitano to talk about the anxiety of life after graduation — where the fear of the unknown really comes from, and why discernment starts the moment you stop trying to force certainty. Key Topics: Why "What's your plan?" quietly writes God out of the decision How the need for a plan can be fear wearing the mask of responsibility Why starting at the end — not the next step — makes half your options disappear Why naming a fear out loud drains most of its power How the experience that changed you becomes the one you most need to integrate Learn More: The Personalist Cure — John Paul II's blueprint for a Catholic standard of psychology Join us in Dallas, Oct 20–23: Summit of Integration Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

God Is Tired of One Thing (Hint: It's Not Your Sin): Healing the Scrupulous Spirit Through Loving Trust

Aug 25, 2026 52 min

Trust isn't something you manufacture through effort — it's something you receive through relationship. In this episode, Dr. Greg Bottaro concludes the series on OCPD and perfectionism by exploring why control feels so necessary, how our earliest relationships shape our ability to trust God, and why freedom begins not when we become perfect, but when we allow ourselves to be loved. Because holiness isn't built on mastering the perfect spiritual routine — it's built on learning to rest in the love that has always been pursuing you. Key Topics: Why trust can't be built through more effort, more surrender, or the right devotion How "trying harder" to trust God is actually the pattern itself, not the way out of it How the parts of us that need control aren't bad, but are protecting something deeper Why compassion, not correction, is the first step toward healing a controlling part How self-possession exists for the sake of self-gift — and why you can't give what you don't have Why holiness was never meant to end fear of hell, but to end the need to earn love in the first place How real healing only happens in relationship — not in a program, a podcast, or a novena Learn More: Previous episodes in this series on Obsessive Compulsive Personality Patterns: Ep. #290: "I'm Only Loved When I'm Perfect": The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder Ep. #291: OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty Ep. #292: Holy Anxiety: The Understandable Underbelly of Scrupulosity Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II Presence Virtual Retreat: Practice the presence of God and trustful surrender Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: Th...

Holy Anxiety: The Understandable Underbelly of Scrupulosity

Aug 18, 2026 45 min

Scrupulosity often looks like devotion — but when fear takes over, even our spiritual life can become consumed by doubt, checking, and the search for certainty. In this episode, Dr. Greg Bottaro continues the series on OCPD and perfectionism, exploring the difference between a healthy conscience and a scrupulous one, why mercy can be hard to trust, and how our experiences shape the way we see God. Holiness was never meant to be an endless audit — it was meant to lead us into relationship with the One who loves us. Key Topics: How reciting the truth about mercy in your head does nothing to change what your body still believes Why certainty about being forgiven is the one thing this pattern can never actually get Why confession, meant to bring peace, can quietly become just another form of checking How the voice you call your conscience might actually be a punishing voice in disguise Why the face you're afraid God is making at you was never really His How the saints wrestled with scrupulosity — and what finally brought them peace wasn't more proof Why doing this work alone almost always makes the pattern worse How the way out can feel too easy to trust Learn More: Previous episodes in this series on Obsessive Compulsive Personality Patterns: Ep. #290: "I'm Only Loved When I'm Perfect": The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder Ep. #291: OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty Episode referenced on spiritual bypassing: Why "Everything Happens for a Reason" Isn't Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Aba...

OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty

Aug 11, 2026 45 min

Certainty feels like safety. But you can only ever be certain alone — and the life you build on control slowly becomes a lonely one. In week two of the series on OCPD, Dr. Greg explores why we reach for control when trust feels dangerous — and how the certainty we build to feel safe ends up costing us the very relationships it was meant to protect. Key Topics: Why the certainty that makes you feel safe is the same thing that leaves you alone How a rule can feel safer than a person — because a rule never changes its face Why the control you use to protect the people you love can drive them straight into the danger you feared How devotion can quietly turn into a contract with God instead of trust in Him Why trying harder to get it perfect is the pattern itself, not the way out of it Learn More: Previous episode in this series — OCPD Part 1: Ep. #290: "I'm Only Loved When I'm Perfect": The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas — launching the Year of St. John Paul II Faith of the Fatherless: The Psychology of Atheism by Dr. Paul Vitz — on how wounded trust in a father can shape our capacity for faith Person and Act — St. John Paul II's (Karol Wojtyła's) philosophical work on the acting person, and the personalist heart of this episode Stop Walking on Eggshells by Paul Mason & Randi Kreger — the book on borderline patterns Dr. Greg references Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265:...

"I'm Only Loved When I'm Perfect": The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder

Aug 4, 2026 40 min

Perfectionism doesn't always come from loving excellence. Sometimes it's the only way you've ever known how to feel safe. In the first episode of a new series on Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, Dr. Greg unpacks how perfectionism, rigidity, and control take root—and why, underneath them, control quietly fills the space where trust was supposed to be. Key Topics: Why the pursuit of perfection is often less about loving excellence and more about not feeling safe without it How "until I'm perfect, I'm not loved" becomes the sentence an entire personality gets built on Why one small mistake can feel like disconnection instead of just a mistake How conscientiousness and perfectionism can look identical from the outside—and the one thing that tells them apart Why you can get everything right and still never feel free to rest Why the love you keep trying to earn was already given—before you got anything right Learn More: Person and Act and Related Essays by Karol Wojtyła (St. John Paul II) — the anthropology of self-possession and self-gift behind this episode Join a future Black Elk healing retreat at the Hawkeye Ranch in Wyoming Episode referenced on spiritual bypassing and scrupulosity: Ep. #288: Why "Everything Happens for a Reason" Isn't Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing Inner Parts Easy Conversation Guide — an audio guide to get to know your inner parts. Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear...

You Can't Heal What You Won't Face: How Presence Breaks the Cycle of Fear

Jul 28, 2026 43 min

Avoidance works. That's the problem. Every time you dodge the hard thing, the relief is real—and so is the price you don't see coming. In this final episode of the series on avoidance, Dr. Greg makes the case that the way out isn't escape or a burst of willpower, but presence: staying in the room one second longer than you want to, and letting God meet you in the mess you were trying to hide. Key Topics: Why the relief avoidance gives you is exactly what keeps you stuck Why good therapy and mentorship refuse to hand you advice—and why that's what actually heals How even "staying present" can quietly become one more way to avoid what's surfacing Why healing works like a bruise, not a breakthrough—slow, at its own pace, and impossible to rush What to do the moment the wall goes up: stay in the room one second longer than you want to Why God doesn't wait at the finish line of your healing, but walks through the locked door to meet you in it Learn More: Presence Virtual Retreat: As a gift to listeners of Being Human, we're offering two full months free. Use code BHVRTRIAL at checkout to begin. The Retreat is a monthly subscription that brings together faith and psychology to help you overcome anxiety, quiet negative thought patterns, and live as if you truly believe in a God who loves you. Your first two months are completely free; after that, it continues at $17/month, and you're free to cancel anytime. Stay connected — join our newsletter Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas Watch Being Human on YouTube – Watch the full video archive of the Being Human podcast Previous episodes in this series on Avoidance: Ep. #286: A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoidant Mind and the Burden of Being Known Ep. #287: We Are Not Robots: Why Connection Is Not Optional for Human Flourishing Ep. #288: Why "Everything Happens for a Reason" Isn't Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep...

Why "Everything Happens for a Reason" Isn't Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing

Jul 21, 2026 48 min

"Offer it up." "I've forgiven them." "Everything happens for a reason." Every one of them is true—and every one can become a way to avoid the healing God is actually offering. In this episode, Dr. Greg names spiritual bypassing: using prayer, devotion, and even good theology to step around grief, anger, and the wounds still waiting underneath. He explains why grace builds on nature, and why God heals only the humanity we're willing to bring into the light. Key Topics: Why the one escape nobody warns you about is the one everyone applauds: prayer, retreats, "offering it up" How "I've already forgiven them" can be completely true and still leave the same wound bleeding for years Why "I'm still discerning" is sometimes just stalling with a halo on it How taking Mary or Joseph as your parent can heal a wound—or quietly become the reason you never grieve the one you actually had Why the anger you keep spiritualizing away might be the exact thing you most need to listen to Why you can pray for years, go to confession after confession, and still land in the same cycle—and what that finally reveals Learn More: Stay connected — join our newsletter Join us at the Summit of Integration this October in Dallas Online presentation on anxiety: Learn the "secret" Dr. Greg holds back in this episode—that the anxiety itself isn't the problem Presence Virtual Retreat: Practice the presence of God and trustful surrender Integrated Life app: Bring every part of yourself into the light—JP2's meaning of integration State of the Institute replay: Hear the massive "Year of JP2" news The Personalist Cure: Dr. Greg's book on John Paul II's philosophy and its role in psychology Person and Act: St. John Paul II's (Karol Wojtyła's) philosophical work on integration and the acting person, referenced in this episode Our God's Brother: St. John Paul II's (Karol Wojtyła's) play about Brother Albert Previous episodes in this series on Avoidance: Ep. #286: A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoid...

We Are Not Robots: Why Connection Is Not Optional for Human Flourishing

Jul 14, 2026 36 min

There's a lot of talk recently about whether AI can be considered a person. But the more serious question might be whether people are becoming too much like AI—learning to live without real connection. To keep our distance. To avoid vulnerability. To convince ourselves that we don't need anyone. In this episode, Dr. Greg continues the series on avoidance by turning to schizoid personality: the pattern where the wish for connection hasn't just been buried by fear, but has gone quiet altogether. Drawing on the personalism of St. John Paul II, he shows why we stay made out of relationship, for relationship—even when the desire seems gone. Key Topics: Why "I don't need anyone" can be a wound dressed up as strength How the desire for connection can go so quiet it reads as no desire at all What that flood of relief when plans fall through is actually telling you How being neglected early teaches you to neglect yourself—and call it your personality Why "self-help" was never going to be enough, and real healing needs another person Why fearing closeness and feeling indifferent to it look identical from the outside but run on opposite engines Learn More: Previous episode in this series on avoidance: Ep. #286: A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoidant Mind and the Burden of Being Known Previous episode on attachment theory: Ep. #63: Attachment Theory: What It Is, What It Isn't, and How It Affects Your Relationships Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #2...

A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoidant Mind and the Burden of Being Known

Jul 7, 2026 32 min

Avoidance looks like not wanting people. It's almost always the opposite: wanting connection so badly that being seen feels like the biggest risk of all. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores avoidant personality patterns through the lens of Catholic anthropology—where the quiet tug-of-war between longing to be known and fearing rejection comes from, and how the difference between what happens in us and what we choose opens a path toward freedom. Key Topics: Why "I just need my space" can be a wall dressed up as a boundary How a childhood full of real love—not neglect—can still teach you that being seen means being blamed Why avoidant personality isn't the same as avoidant attachment, even though they share a name What the text you rewrite four times before sending is actually protecting you from Why even your anger can be an imitation of Christ, not something to hide How the difference between what "happens" in you and what you choose to do can pull you out of hiding Learn More: Previous episode on attachment theory: Ep. #63: Attachment Theory: What It Is, What It Isn't, and How It Affects Your Relationships Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Person and Act: St. John Paul II's (Karol Wojtyła's) philosophical work on the acting person, referenced in this episode Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the...

Venting Isn't Always Healing: The Difference Between Sharing Truth and Feeding Resentment

Jun 30, 2026 51 min

Getting it all off your chest is supposed to be healing. But sometimes the venting that feels like relief is quietly feeding your resentment instead. In this episode, Dr. Greg sits down with Fr. Gregory Pine—author of Training the Tongue—to explore why the deepest purpose of speech is communion, and how to tell the difference between working through your pain and simply settling the score. Key Topics: Why the real purpose of speech isn't expressing yourself — it's communion How to tell whether you're venting toward healing or just venting to settle the score Why the friend who only ever agrees with you might be the one holding you back What separates a listener who helps you grow from one who only feeds your anger Why "getting it off your chest" can leave the wound exactly where it was How custody of the tongue is good news, not one more rule to feel guilty about Learn More: Fr. Gregory Pine's book: Training the Tongue and Growing Beyond Sins of Speech Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Start of the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment...

Stop Chasing Spiritual Highs: Why Real Healing Happens in the Ordinary

Jun 23, 2026 40 min

Your prayer life can be how you avoid healing. In this final episode of the antisocial series, Dr. Greg unpacks why a retreat high or a powerful devotional moment can convince you the healing is done — when the actual work hasn't started yet, and why that work happens in the small, unglamorous moments nobody puts on a holy card. Key Topics: Why the most moving retreat of your life can leave you exactly the same — and what actually changes you What "magical penance" reveals about the parts of us that prefer grand gestures to real repair Why healing happens in what you do on an ordinary Tuesday, not in the moments when everything breaks open How a soft heart and a defenseless heart are not the same thing — and why that distinction changes everything Why the urge to be "healed already" is itself a form of the pattern you're trying to change Why re-hardening after you've opened up isn't failure — it's part of doing the reps Learn More: Earlier in this series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Antisocial Part 1 — Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Antisocial Part 2 — Ep. #282: You're (Probably) Not a Serial Killer—But You May Share Some of Their Antisocial Traits Antisocial Part 3 — Ep. #283: "I Will Never Be Hurt Again": How Jesus' Sacred Heart Breaks the Cycle The Wounded Healer by Henri Nouwen — the book Dr. Greg references on accompaniment and the standard of showing up, not being healed Person and Act by Karol Wojtyła (Pope St. John Paul II) Love and Responsibility by Karol Wojtyła (Pope St. John Paul II) Previous episode on boundaries: Ep. #254: Navigating "Toxic" Relationships: Setting Boundaries Without Losing Charity Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fea...

"I Will Never Be Hurt Again": How Jesus' Sacred Heart Breaks the Cycle

Jun 16, 2026 47 min

A hardened heart isn't where the story starts. It's what's left after a child trusted, got hurt, and concluded: I'll never be in that position again. This week, Dr. Greg turns the antisocial series toward hope: looking at how that hardness forms, and how the Sacred Heart of Jesus, betrayed and pierced yet still open, breaks the pattern. Key Topics: Why a hardened heart is never cold by nature—it's protection learned the first time trusting backfired Why the urge to control everyone around you is really an old strategy for never being at anyone's mercy again How "making up for it" can quietly become a way to avoid facing the wound underneath Why Jesus didn't heal the hardened heart from a safe distance—He walked straight into betrayal and stayed open What it means that control isn't the enemy; where you aim it is what changes everything Why healing means loving even the parts of you that sin, not just the parts that behave Why you can't will yourself into trust overnight—and why that slowness reflects your dignity, not your failure Learn More: Earlier in this series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Antisocial Part 1 — Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Antisocial Part 2 — Ep. #282: You're (Probably) Not a Serial Killer—But You May Share Some of Their Antisocial Traits The Litany for Mental Health Dr. Greg references: A Litany for Mental Health The original Sacred Heart revelations: The Autobiography of Saint Margaret Mary Alacoque Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series...

You're (Probably) Not a Serial Killer—But You May Share Some of Their Antisocial Traits

Jun 9, 2026 1 hr 0 min

You're probably not a serial killer. But the patterns that shape one run through all of us, at lower volume. In this episode, Dr. Greg traces antisocial patterns back to their source in everyday life — how we manage people, pray, and protect ourselves from being hurt again. Key Topics: Why the patterns that define serial killers aren't limited to serial killers — and how to see yourself honestly in that mirror How omnipotent control can look like loyalty, competence, or even holiness — and what it's protecting underneath What "magical penance" looks like when atonement becomes a form of control instead of real repair Why prayer can become negotiation with God — and why that's a subtle form of magical thinking How the "hardened heart" of Scripture isn't just Pharaoh — it's any wall quietly built against trust How to meet the controlling parts of yourself with compassion instead of condemnation Learn More: Previous episode in the Being Human series on the Antisocial Defense Patterns: Ep. #281: Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns Love and Responsibility by Karol Wojtyla (Pope St. John Paul II) Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary: Why Real Change Happens through Love not Willpower Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Control or Be Controlled: The Devastating Wounds Behind Antisocial Behavioral Patterns

Jun 2, 2026 48 min

Not every rule-breaker is choosing rebellion. Most are choosing safety — and they've been doing it since childhood. In this first episode of a new series, Dr. Greg takes apart what "antisocial" actually means and traces the pattern back to its source: not evil or criminal, but a deep wound that learned to survive by refusing to trust. Key Topics: Why "antisocial" has nothing to do with introversion — and what it actually describes How charm and omnipotent control can be defenses, not personality traits Why growing up with an unpredictable parent makes rules feel like threats instead of like love What the interpersonal wish "help me trust you" reveals beneath even the most closed-off exterior Why the parts of us that push back against rules deserve curiosity, not condemnation How empathy, education, and direction together create the conditions where rules feel like love Why the gap between antisocial patterns and ordinary daily life is narrower than we'd like to admit Learn More: Summit of Integration 2026 — Join us in Dallas, October 20–23, celebrating the Feast of St. John Paul II. Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing: A Deep Dive into the Dependent Defense Pattern Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary: Why Real Change Happens through Love not Willpower Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation. Want to he...

Being Human in the Age of AI: Exploring What Machines Can't Replace with a World-Class Artist

May 26, 2026 44 min

AI was supposed to replace what humans make. Instead, it's revealing what only humans can. In this episode, Dr. Greg sits down with Mike Marshall, Director of Design at the CatholicPsych Institute, to explore the irony at the heart of the AI age: the closer machines get to perfection, the more clearly we see that imperfection isn't a flaw to engineer away: it's the signature of being human. Key Topics: What it means to be human in an age that can imitate almost everything Why the closer AI gets to "perfect," the more obvious it becomes that something's missing Why signing your work is becoming a quiet act of resistance in an age of imitation What it actually takes to stay human in a world that's getting very good at faking it Learn More: Letter to Artists by Pope St. John Paul II – The letter referenced throughout the conversation mikemarshalldesign.com – The hand behind every piece of CatholicPsych branding, and available for freelance work The Everlasting Man by G.K. Chesterton – The meditation Mike draws from on man as "maker," not Creator The Mindful Catholic by Dr. Greg Bottaro – The book with the "keys in a blender" story Dr. Greg never expected readers to remember Watch other Being Human episodes on YouTube – Watch the full video archive of the Being Human podcast Sam Altman on AI Images – The referenced video clip on why the value of perfection is going to zero The Integrated Life Journal – Quarterly journal on disintegrated care in the modern world, and what integration looks like in practice Summit of Integration 2026 – Sign up to learn more about this year's event! Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Stop Diagnosing Your Kids: Rethinking "Behavior Problems" Through Development and Love

May 19, 2026 37 min

The meltdown. The defiance. The constant "look at me." It's easy to wonder if something is wrong. But most of the time, these aren't signs of a disorder — they're signs of development still in progress. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores what's really underneath "behavior problems," why children can't be diagnosed with personality disorders, and why the question that changes everything isn't "what's wrong with my child?" — but "what does my child need from me right now?" Key Topics: Why children cannot be diagnosed with personality disorders — and what's actually happening when their behavior looks like one How emotional regulation is learned, not innate — and what co-regulation actually looks like Why a child's dramatic, self-centered, or defiant behavior is often developmentally appropriate What it means when a child borrows a parent's nervous system — and why that steadiness is the foundation Why the patterns we see in our kids so often point back to something in us How a parent's own unhealed wounds shape the environment a child grows up inside Why admitting our own imperfection is one of the most formative things we can give our children Learn More: CatholicPsych Newsletter - Sign up to stay connected and hear the latest developments! Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Pilgrimage to Poland - Learn more about this journey with St. John Paul II Summit of Integration 2026 - Sign up to learn more about this year's event! Healing Retr...

Better than 20 Billion Dollars: A Litany For Mental Health

May 12, 2026 31 min

$20 billion in research. Suicide rates 32% higher than the year 2000. Something is deeply wrong — and it isn't a lack of effort. In this episode, Dr. Greg makes the case that the mental health crisis isn't a funding problem or an awareness problem. It's a standard problem. Without a vision of what a healthy human person actually looks like, the best we can do is manage symptoms. And he introduces something new: a Mental Health Litany and Novena beginning May 15th — nine days of prayer leading into Pentecost, naming the specific fears and lies beneath our patterns and bringing them before Christ. Key Topics: Why decades of funding and awareness haven't moved mental health in the right direction Why the absence of symptoms is not the same thing as health What Catholic anthropology offers that the mental health industry doesn't have Why the Church has been slow to speak into mental suffering — and what that silence has cost How a litany does something that silence and symptom-management can't What it looks like to bring anxiety, depression, and trauma into Catholic prayer — by name Learn More: Download the Mental Health Litany and join the Novena: catholicpsych.com/litany Bad Therapy by Abigail Shrier: The book Dr. Greg references that argues our current mental health treatments may be making the problems worse Start of the Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certi...

Boring Is Healing: Embracing Hiddenness and Alleviating Histrionic Patterns

May 5, 2026 42 min

Healing isn't about changing your personality. It's about being freed from the compulsions that drive it. In this final episode of the histrionic series, Dr. Greg explores what the path from performance to presence actually looks like — why hiddenness feels terrifying but works like medicine, and why the deepest fear underneath this pattern can only be answered by God. Key Topics: Why healing doesn't mean losing what makes you magnetic — and what actually does need to change How a room falling silent can feel like ceasing to exist — and why that's the wound, not the cure Why hiddenness feels like punishment but acts like medicine What it means when provoking a reaction feels more real than having a real conversation Why no amount of being seen by other people ever quite reaches the thing underneath Why real connection becomes possible only when you stop needing to be the most interesting person in the room Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #276: Back to Eden: Overcoming the Fear of Being Alone Through Divine Love Ep. #275: Hiding the Real You: The Histrionic Battle for Intimacy Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Previous episode on attachment theory: Ep. #63: Attachment Theory: What It Is, What It Isn't, and How It Affects Your Relationships Previous episodes on parts work (IFS): Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/ a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski The Jeweler's Shop by Karol Wojtyla (Pope John Paul II) — the play Dr. Greg references on the theater of the word and the freedom of love God Is Love: St. Teresa Margaret — Her Life — the book Dr. Greg discovered in college about the Carmelite mystic whose life of radical hiddenness is a model for this healing path Saint Elizabeth of the Trinity: The Complete Works, Volume One — the Carmelite mystic Dr. Greg credits...

Back to Eden: Overcoming the Fear of Being Alone Through Divine Love

Apr 28, 2026 44 min

Being seen is not the same as being known. The life of the party can be the most isolated person in the room — filling every silence, commanding every gaze, and going home to an emptiness no audience has ever touched. In this episode, Dr. Greg goes into the loneliest part of the histrionic pattern: why the most socially active person in the room can also be the most profoundly alone, and why only God can reach what no human mirror ever could. Key Topics: Why being the most social person in the room can also leave you the most alone What it reveals when provoking a reaction starts to feel more real than having a real conversation How early wounds teach you that your existence depends on other people's responses Why heat is not warmth — and reaction is not connection What Henri Nouwen's I-Thou relationship reveals about why an audience never actually fills you Why no parent was ever meant to give you what you most deeply need Why God is not just the answer to this wound — but the only one it makes sense to bring it to Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Being Human series on the Histrionic Defense Patterns: Ep. #275: Hiding the Real You: The Histrionic Battle for Intimacy Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Gaudium et Spes — See paragraph 22 for the full quote of "Christ reveals man to himself and makes his supreme calling clear" Henri Nouwen Society — explore Henri Nouwen's writings on the I-Thou relationship Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing: A Deep Dive into the Dependent Defense Pattern Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary: Why Real Change Hap...

Hiding the Real You: The Histrionic Battle for Intimacy

Apr 21, 2026 50 min

What if the person who lights up every room is actually living in fear and darkness? The humor, the charisma, the ease with which they hold attention - beneath the surface, there's often a fragile system always scanning for the next signal that they're still seen. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores how anxious attachment shapes the histrionic pattern - why performance becomes protection, why real closeness can feel threatening even when intimacy is desperately wanted, and how this plays out in relationships and in the spiritual life. Key Topics: Why you can light up every room and still feel completely alone How charm can be a defense, not a personality trait Why real closeness can feel more threatening than rejection How anxiety, not vanity, drives the need to be seen Why any reaction, even a negative one, feels better than being ignored Why boredom feels existentially threatening, not just uncomfortable How intensity gets mistaken for intimacy, and what keeps real closeness out of reach Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation. Previous episode in this series - Histrionic Part 1: Ep. #274: To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation Home of the Being Human podcast – Easily search 250+ episodes on topics of interest. Amoris Laetitia – Post-Synodal Apostolic Exhortation by Pope Francis on Love and the Family Summit of Integration 2026 – Sign up to learn more about this year's event! The Personalist Cure – Upcoming new book by Dr. Greg Bottaro Don't Be Afraid of Screwing Up Your Kids - Because You Already Are – Dr. Greg's guest appearance on the Messy Family Podcast Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic...

To Be Loved Is to Perform: Inside the Histrionic Compulsion for Attention and Validation

Apr 14, 2026 34 min

"Unless someone notices you, you don't matter." For some people, that's not a passing fear — it's the operating system. In this episode, Dr. Greg opens a new series on histrionic personality patterns, exploring what's really underneath the compulsion for attention and validation: not vanity, not drama, but a terror of non-existence so deep it shapes everything. Key Topics: Why attention-seeking can be less about selfishness and more about survival How identity gets built from the outside in — and what gets lost in the process Why the funniest, most entertaining person in the room may be the loneliest What it means when emotional intensity gets mistaken for intimacy How family systems shape and reward the role of the one who keeps everyone watching Why solitude feels so threatening — and what that reveals about all of us How the spiritual life can become its own kind of performance Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Video reflection from James Van Der Beek (Dawson from Dawson's Creek) on identity, suffering, and faith Start of the Being Human series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Previous episodes on parts work: Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Ep. #49: Internal Family Systems & External Family Tensions Previous episode on attachment theory: Ep. #63: Attachment Theory: What It Is, What It Isn't, and How It Affects Your Relationships Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Why Borderline Patterns Are So Hard to Heal (But Not Impossible)

Apr 7, 2026 45 min

Borderline patterns are notoriously hard to treat — but the problem isn't a lack of research. It's that the secular framework approaches healing from a disintegrated view of the person. In this final episode of the series, Dr. Greg explores why lasting healing goes deeper than symptom management, what conditions actually make transformation possible, and how the Catholic understanding of the person changes everything. Key Topics: Why secular treatment can reduce symptoms but can't reach the wound underneath How projective identification, emotional projection, and crisis bonding emerge from a fragmented self — not from bad character Why healing has to happen in relationship, because that's where the wound began What it actually means to rebuild a coherent sense of self from the inside out Why lasting healing requires stable, unidirectional support over time — and why a romantic relationship can't provide it How faith, psychology, and science work together to restore integration and agency Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Love and Responsibility by St. John Paul II Correcting Aquinas: JP2's Truth Bomb on Gender and Human Dignity (Ep. #197) — why marriage can't be a place of healing when the power dynamics are built on a lie Previous episode in this series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #272: You Are Not Your Feelings: From Borderline Chaos to Inner Coherence Ep. #271: Forgive, Explode, Repeat: Humanizing Borderline Personality with St. John Paul II Ep. #270: I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: The Chaos of the Disorganized Attachment Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Acc...

You Are Not Your Feelings: From Borderline Chaos to Inner Coherence

Mar 31, 2026 1 hr 2 min

Breathing exercises help. But they have a ceiling. For someone whose interior world is constant emotional chaos, no amount of skill-building will reach the level where real healing happens. In this episode, Dr. Greg unpacks what actually transforms borderline patterns — not DBT techniques or symptom management, but the kind of sustained, stable relationship that reorganizes the subconscious and restores a coherent sense of self. Key Topics: Why skills like DBT can help but can't replace what's actually missing What it feels like to be subject to your emotions rather than the one having them Why healing looks like forming a continuous "I" — not feeling better in the moment How a consistent, stable relationship quietly rewires the interior life over time Why the same patterns that made life chaotic can become a superpower in healing What it means to move from surviving to true encounter — and why that distinction matters Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Previous episode in this series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #271: Forgive, Explode, Repeat: Humanizing Borderline Personality with St. John Paul II Ep. #270: I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: The Chaos of the Disorganized Attachment Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Stop Walking on Eggshells – A guide for navigating relationships affected by borderline personality patterns Want to go deeper into discernment? Explore our Discernment of Spirits course. Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Forgive, Explode, Repeat: Humanizing Borderline Personality with St. John Paul II

Mar 24, 2026 56 min

Forgive. Explode. Repeat. That's the cycle — and no matter how much effort goes into the repair, it keeps starting over. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores why genuine healing can't happen inside the cycle itself, what "walking on eggshells" misses about the person suffering, and how St. John Paul II's vision of the human person restores dignity to everyone caught in these patterns. Key Topics: Why repair doesn't actually heal — and what's really driving the reset Why calm can feel more threatening than crisis What "walking on eggshells" gets right and what it leaves out How the rupture-repair cycle creates the illusion of intimacy without building it Why both people in the pair end up losing themselves How Catholic anthropology sees the person beneath the pattern Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Previous episode in this series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #270: I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: The Chaos of the Disorganized Attachment Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Person and Act by Karol Wojtyla (Pope St. John Paul II) Stop Walking on Eggshells – A guide for navigating relationships affected by borderline personality patterns Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: The Chaos of the Disorganized Attachment

Mar 17, 2026 38 min

"I love you… now go away." That's the kind of chaos disorganized attachment creates. It's not drama or manipulation. It's deep inner turmoil that makes love feel dangerous and safety hard to trust. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores how childhood wounds shape these push-pull patterns, why closeness can feel threatening even when love is real, and how disorganized attachment helps make sense of borderline personality patterns. Key Topics: Why someone can put you on a pedestal one day and tear you down the next How childhood wounds create push-pull patterns that feel impossible to escape Why closeness can feel like a threat, even when love is real How disorganized attachment helps explain borderline personality patterns Why these patterns are rooted in inner turmoil, not simple manipulation How healing begins by making sense of the chaos instead of being swallowed by it Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Previous episode on attachment theory: Ep. #63: Attachment Theory: What It Is, What It Isn't, and How It Affects Your Relationships Previous episode in this series on the Borderline Defense Patterns: Ep. #269: BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Patterns: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Stop Walking on Eggshells – A guide for navigating relationships affected by borderline personality patterns Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

BORDERLINE: The Push-Pull Between a Fear of Abandonment and Annihilation

Mar 10, 2026 53 min

Borderline personality patterns are often misunderstood and mislabeled—but beneath the surface is a painful struggle shaped by identity instability, emotional overwhelm, and the exhausting push–pull between fearing abandonment and fearing annihilation. In this episode, Dr. Greg brings clarity and compassion to this pattern, offering language and hope for anyone who recognizes these dynamics in themselves or in someone they love. Key Topics: Why borderline patterns are so often misunderstood The exhausting push–pull between fearing abandonment and fearing annihilation How identity instability fuels intense relationship dynamics Why emotions can feel overwhelming and all-consuming Why conflict and drama can start to feel like proof of connection How integration and truth open the path toward healing Learn More: Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Start of the Being Human series on the Dependent Defense Pattern: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Start of the Being Human series on the Narcissistic Defense Pattern: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Stop Walking on Eggshells – A guide for navigating relationships affected by borderline personality patterns Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

What Free Love Ought to Mean: Healing Codependent Wounds and Learning to Love Freely

Mar 3, 2026 57 min

Even if you're Christian — even if your spouse is a genuinely good person — you can still feel deeply unfulfilled. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores how asking another person to carry your identity, security, and worth turns love into survival — and leaves both people depleted. Key Topics: How misplaced dependence slowly erodes love Why identity collapses when relationships become sources of self-worth The difference between free self-gift and anxious attachment How to properly order your love Learn More: Pilgrimage to Poland - Learn more about this interior journey with St. John Paul II Summit of Integration 2026 - Sign up to learn more about this year's event! Healing Retreat in Wyoming - Learn more about our upcoming retreat experience. Being Human episodes on the Dependent Defense Pattern: Ep. #267: Not All Satisfaction Is Good: Understanding Codependency As Relationship Cancer Ep. #266: You're Giving Too Much! Uncovering How Anxiety Disguises Itself as Holiness Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Gaudium et Spes - Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World by Pope Paul VI Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Not All Satisfaction Is Good: Understanding Codependency As Relationship Cancer

Feb 24, 2026 55 min

What if you're mistaking something emotionally dangerous for love? In this episode, Dr. Greg tackles a painful but common pattern: relationships that look close, committed, and appear to be flourishing, yet quietly trap both people in fear, dependence, and anxiety. Key Topics: Why both partners can feel "happy" even as the relationship becomes unhealthy How codependency distorts the kind of free, fruitful relationships God calls us to Why awareness and willpower aren't enough to break these cycles – and what we can do to heal them Learn More: Pilgrimage to Poland - Learn more about this interior journey with St. John Paul II Being Human episodes on the Dependent Defense Pattern: Ep. #266: You're Giving Too Much! Uncovering How Anxiety Disguises Itself as Holiness Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Person and Act by Karol Wojtyla (Pope Saint John Paul II) Love and Responsibility by Karol Wojtyla (Pope Saint John Paul II) Discernment of Spirits - Learn more through the lens of Catholic anthropology and Catholic mindfulness Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

You're Giving Too Much! Uncovering How Anxiety Disguises Itself as Holiness

Feb 17, 2026 1 hr 6 min

What if the reason you feel anxious, resentful, or exhausted from "doing the right thing" isn't a lack of generosity—but anxiety hiding behind virtue? This episode explores the crucial difference between authentic Christian self-gift and giving that's really about survival, revealing how true sacrifice should expand freedom, not erase you. Key Topics: The difference between Christian self-gift and anxiety-driven giving Why humility is not the same as self-erasure How attachment wounds can fuel overgiving How dependent and narcissistic patterns reinforce each other Why true love always increases freedom Learn More: Love and Responsibility by Karol Wojtyla (Pope John Paul II) Casti Connubii (Encyclical of Pope Pius XI on Christian Marriage) Being Human episode on the Dependent Defense Pattern: Ep. #265: Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Jerry Maguire, Gollum, and the Fear of Not Existing: A Deep Dive into the Dependent Defense Pattern

Feb 10, 2026 55 min

Have you ever felt safer letting someone else decide—not because you didn't care, but because choosing for yourself felt overwhelming or even dangerous? Dr. Greg explores the dependent defense pattern and why giving up agency can feel like survival—until healing restores the freedom to exist, choose, and love. Key Topics: Why dependency isn't just fear of being alone—but fear of not existing alone How proximity can start to feel like survival Why some people lose touch with what they want, like, or dream about How dependency can quietly shape marriages, families, and faith And how healing doesn't erase need—it restores freedom Learn More: Being Human episodes on narcissistic personality patterns: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Ep. #262: Spiritual Narcissism: Exposing the Sneaky Way We Use Religion as a Pattern of Protection Ep. #263: Holiness and Narcissism Ep. #264: IFS, JP2 and Narcissism Is Leadership of the Family a Man's Job? (Being Human, Ep. #201) Correcting Aquinas: JP2's Truth Bomb on Gender and Human Dignity (Being Human, Ep. #197) Being Human episodes on Parts Work: Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Ep. #49: Internal Family Systems & External Family Tensions Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

IFS, JPII and Narcissism: Unburdening the Subconscious on the Way to Healing

Feb 3, 2026 45 min

Dr. Greg wraps up the series on narcissism by going beneath behavior and willpower, drawing on JP2 and psychology to show how real healing happens at the subconscious level. Learn how narcissistic patterns can be unburdened and integrated with compassion—not erased or fought—so healing can actually take root. Key Topics: Why a narcissistic part is not a monster, but a protector How deep wounds get buried beneath conscious awareness and still drive behavior Why healing isn't about willpower or "trying harder" How narcissistic patterns can be unburdened and integrated, rather than erased Learn More: Being Human episodes on Narcissism: Ep. #263: Holiness and Narcissism: Undoing the Knots with Awareness, Self-Determination, Empathy and Our Lady Ep. #262: Spiritual Narcissism: Exposing the Sneaky Way We Use Religion as a Pattern of Protection Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Related blog articles: The Problem with the Bishop Scandals Outlining Narcissistic Personality Disorder The Two Types of Narcissism Being Human episodes on Parts Work: Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Ep. #47: How to Turn Your Inner Worst Enemies into Your Inner Best Friends Person and Act by Karol Wojtyla (Pope Saint John Paul II) Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Holiness and Narcissism: Undoing the Knots with Awareness, Self-Determination, Empathy and Our Lady

Jan 27, 2026 46 min

"Die to yourself." "Offer it up." What happens when these phrases get tangled with woundedness? In this episode, we explore spiritual narcissism—and the path back to freedom through awareness, empathy, self-determination, and Our Lady. Key Topics: Why "good advice" can sometimes feel silencing rather than supportive How being told to "pray more" can replace real listening The hidden ways love can feel conditional in spiritual spaces How spiritual environments can quietly erode trust in your own intuition Learn More: Related blog articles: The Problem with the Bishop Scandals Outlining Narcissistic Personality Disorder The Two Types of Narcissism Being Human episodes on Narcissism: Ep. #262: Spiritual Narcissism: Exposing the Sneaky Way We Use Religion as a Pattern of Protection Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Spiritual Narcissism: Exposing the Sneaky Way We Use Religion as a Pattern of Protection

Jan 20, 2026 43 min

When faith is used to silence, control, or end conversations, something has gone wrong. In this episode, Dr. Greg exposes spiritual narcissism—the hidden way woundedness disguises itself as holiness and quietly breaks relationships from the inside out. Key Topics: Why spiritual maturity does not automatically include emotional maturity How faith can unconsciously be used to shut down dialogue Why boundaries can be an authentic act of mercy How real healing requires integration, not just more prayer or effort How spiritual language can become a shield against vulnerability rather than a path to communion Why grace perfects nature but does not bypass psychological woundedness Why marriage is not a chain of command but a mutual gift of self How authority language can become a warning sign instead of a virtue Why feeling confused, guilty, or silenced in a "faithful" relationship signals deeper misalignment Learn More: Related blog articles: The Problem with the Bishop Scandals Outlining Narcissistic Personality Disorder The Two Types of Narcissism Being Human episodes on Narcissism: Ep. #261: Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary Ep. #68: "I'm Not Narcissistic, You're Narcissistic!" Ep. #67: An Antidote to Narcissism Ep. #21: A Look at Narcissist Personality Disorder Being Human Ep. #201: Is Leadership of the Family a Man's Job? Being Human episodes on Parts Work: Ep. #49: Internal Family Systems & External Family Tensions Ep. #47: How to Turn Your Inner Worst Enemies into Your Inner Best Friends Pastores Dabo Vobis (St. John Paul II) – On human formation as the foundation of spiritual, intellectual, and pastoral growth Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Narcissism and the Terror of Being Ordinary: Why Real Change Happens through Love not Willpower

Jan 13, 2026 41 min

Everyone's talking about narcissism — but most of the conversation is missing what's really going on underneath. In this episode, Dr. Greg uncovers the blind spot driving narcissistic patterns, and why willpower never creates the change that only love can. Key Topics: Why willpower alone never leads to real change How blind spots protect us from unbearable shame What "the terror of being ordinary" actually means Why patience and sacrifice don't heal narcissism And what does create the conditions for change Learn More: Being Human episodes on Narcissism: Ep. #21: A Look at Narcissist Personality Disorder Ep. #67: An Antidote to Narcissism Ep. #68: "I'm Not Narcissistic, You're Narcissistic!" Being Human episodes on Parts Work: Ep. #34: A New Theory! w/a Catholic Lens Ep. #35: Why Do I Feel Like I Have Conflicting Thoughts? w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Ep. #36: A Guided Exercise w/ Dr. Peter Malinoski Ep. #47: How to Turn Your Inner Worst Enemies into Your Inner Best Friends Ep. #49: Internal Family Systems & External Family Tensions Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

The Secret Story of Guadalupe: The Untold Depth of God's Plan to Save the Americas

Jan 6, 2026 1 hr 0 min

The tilma is so astonishing that it may have actually distracted us from the deeper story of Guadalupe. In this episode, Dr. Greg and Joseph González uncover the ancient prophecies and cultural preparation that reveal an even bigger plan at work. Key Topics: Why the tilma may actually distract us from the real Guadalupe story. How God was preparing the Americas long before the missionaries arrived. The ancient "flower world" poetry that mirrors Juan Diego's tilma. What the four-petaled flower over Mary's womb really means. Why almost 10 million conversions suddenly made sense. How Guadalupe shows the right way to evangelize a culture. How archaeology is only now uncovering what God was already doing. What Guadalupe reveals about how God is working in your life, unseen. Learn More: Guadalupe and the Flower World Prophecy – Dive deeper into the book and additional work by Joseph Julian & Monique González Being Human Ep. #257 — "This Book Just Changed My Life" – Dr. Greg's first exploration of Guadalupe and the Flower World Prophecy. Joseph Julian González on YouTube – Watch more of his reflections, research, and musical explorations into the Flower World tradition. Misa Azteca (by Joseph González) – The musical work that first opened the door to Joseph's research into Guadalupe and the Flower World. Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Stop Preventing the Saints From Doing their Job! The Psychology of Devotion with Dr. Gerard McNicholas

Dec 30, 2025 1 hr 0 min

The saints aren't waiting to be admired — they're actively trying to help us right now. In this episode, Dr. Greg sits down with Dr. Gerard McNicholas to unpack the psychology of devotion, what a living relationship with the saints can look like, and why the "messiness" that sometimes shows up during consecrations may actually be where God is doing His most personal work. Key Topics: Why Dr. Greg says most of us "block" the saints. How devotion becomes a real relationship instead of just a pious habit. When consecrations stir up drama—and why that can be a good sign. The psychology behind spiritual "trends" and jumping into devotions too fast. How scrupulosity and the "tyranny of the shoulds" hijack your prayer life. Why St. Joseph and Our Lady want to be part of your daily life. A simple four-step way to ride out anxiety and spiritual desolation. How friendship and Ignatian wisdom keep you from panicking in hard seasons. Why letting the saints "do their job" can change how you suffer. Learn More: Being Human Ep. #56: Writing Your Story with God with Dr. Gerard McNicholas "When Coping Mechanisms Aren't Enough" – Dr. Gerard McNicholas' interview on The Catholic Sinner Show Catholic Mindfulness Virtual Retreat – An 8-week journey into peace, trust, and deeper relationship with God The Surrender Novena by Fr. Dolindo Ruotolo – A devotion rooted in surrendering control and trusting Jesus more fully. Hope and Help for Your Nerves — Dr. Claire Weekes' classic guide on anxiety, panic, and nervous suffering Summit of Integration – Be the first to hear about event updates and special offers Consecration to Jesus through Joseph by Dr. Greg Bottaro and Jen Settle – A deep dive into devotion, psychology, and relationship through the Holy Family Consecration to St. Joseph – Fr. Donald Calloway's guide to rediscovering the fatherhood and mission of Joseph Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Ac...

Episode 258: You Were Never Supposed to Hear This Conversation: A Merry Christmas Conversation with the CatholicPsych Leadership Council

Dec 23, 2025 1 hr 4 min

Dr. Greg hits record on a Christmas group call with the CatholicPsych Leadership Council, and things immediately go off-script—in the best way. It's a chaotic, joyful, surprisingly deep year-in-review with candid moments, real humanity, and honest conversation about vocation, formation, and the Holy Spirit, plus a few teasers for 2026. Key Topics: The unseen personal work behind CatholicPsych's growth this past year Why real formation often feels disorienting before it feels hopeful Why integration of faith and psychology can't be fully explained—only experienced What the Summit revealed that no amount of planning could have predicted What's emerging next for CatholicPsych as it moves beyond a single voice or brand Hints about what 2026 will hold (including JP2, pilgrimage, and deeper community) Learn More: Summit of Integration 2026 – Be the first to hear updates on CatholicPsych's annual gathering focused on integration, formation, and community. Further reading: The Art of Existential Counseling by Fr. Adrian Van Kaam The Flight from Woman by Karl Stern Pilgrimage to Poland (in the footsteps of St. John Paul II) – Interested in joining? Sign up to receive updates. Previous episode on Our Lady of Guadalupe: Ep. #257: This Book Just Changed My Life: Our Lady of Guadalupe and the Flower World Prophecy Previous episode on St. Thomas Aquinas and women: Ep. #250: Correcting Luther…and Aquinas? Calling Out Disintegration in the Church Dating Back to the Reformation Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

This Book Just Changed My Life: Our Lady of Guadalupe and the Flower World Prophecy

Dec 16, 2025 49 min

Dr. Greg explores a stunning new perspective on Our Lady of Guadalupe—the kind that overturns what you thought you knew. This episode dives into the wild, tender, deeply human layers of indigenous prophecy and shows how God works through the messy, unexpected places in every culture and every heart. Key Topics: Why Dr. Greg believes most of us actually don't know the real story of Our Lady of Guadalupe The jaw-dropping details in Juan Diego's original account that reframe the entire miracle How nearly 10 million conversions in a decade suddenly make sense in a new light The surprising reason early missionaries struggled with evangelization—and what finally broke everything open Why the Guadalupe story reveals a deeper truth about evangelizing the people we love today The unexpected connection between the incarnation, tribal cultures, and the way God enters every human story Learn More: Guadalupe and the Flower World Prophecy – Dive deeper into the book and additional work by Joseph Julian & Monique González Joseph Julian González on YouTube – Watch more of his reflections, research, and musical explorations into the Flower World tradition. Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

Stop Treating Joseph like a Nativity Prop: Unpacking the Terror of Demons with Fr. Colin Lomnitzer

Dec 9, 2025 52 min

In this episode, Dr. Greg and Fr. Colin Lomnitzer dive into the real St. Joseph—the man who quietly shaped Jesus' courage, work, identity, and tenderness far more than most people realize. For anyone wrestling with father wounds, questions about masculinity, or mission, this conversation offers a powerful and healing perspective. Key Topics: The surprising ways Joseph reverses generations of wounded fatherhood stretching from Adam to Abraham The invitation to let Joseph father you where your own story carries hurt, fear, or mistrust Why Jesus needed a real mother and a real father—and what that means for your own healing The hidden "reparenting" offered through baptism and why Mary and Joseph matter for your emotional life The overlooked link between Joseph's example and how Jesus treated women in the Gospels Why the Church may be recovering a deeper understanding of Joseph right when the world needs fathers most Learn More: Connect with Fr. Colin Lomnitzer — Discover more about Fr. Colin's ministry accompanying newly-ordained priests. From the Desk of Fr. Lomnitzer (Substack) – Reflections, notes, and insights from life as a Catholic priest. Guardian of the Redeemer – St. John Paul II's apostolic exhortation on the person and mission of St. Joseph "Double Trinity" Painting – The artwork featured on Fr. Colin's ordination card Consecration to Jesus through St. Joseph – A 44-day deep dive into the life and meaning of St. Joseph and Our Lady as they relate to our integrated human journey growing closer in union with Jesus Christ. Related episodes on fatherhood and masculinity: Ep. 163: Leading with Weakness: Authenticity in Fatherhood Ep. 248: The Hard Part about Being Dads and How to Do It Well Ep. 31: What Everyone Gets Wrong about St. Joseph Understanding "Development of Doctrine" (Referenced in this Episode) – Learn more in Being Human Episode 250 Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Pr...

From Wife to Widow and Wife: A Journey of Shock, Faith, and Healing with Kate LeFaivre

Dec 2, 2025 1 hr 6 min

Kate LeFaivre shares the night everything changed—going to bed a wife and waking up a widow with eight kids, no warning, and a faith that had to carry her through shock. Dr. Greg and Kate explore what happens when the spiritual life meets real loss, and how grace shows up in places we never expect. Key Topics: The night Kate's husband died suddenly and the shock that reshaped her family forever How she navigated telling eight children their father was gone—and the hidden moments she only learned about years later The grief "checklist" she followed for a year…and why she still felt worse The Holy Week moment when Kate heard God speak directly into her despair The long, unexpected journey of becoming "a whole person" again after the death of a spouse How community support (and true, non-taking friendship) carried her through the darkest days What it was really like to consider dating again as a widowed mother of eight The birth of Mosaic Mentorship and why Kate now helps others rebuild beauty from broken pieces Learn More: Connect with Kate LeFaivre — Learn more about Mosaic Mentorship and Kate's work accompanying those carrying heavy grief CanaVox — A resource for understanding and strengthening marriage through research-based reading groups Need help? Schedule a free CatholicPsych consultation Want to help? Learn more about our Certification in Professional Accompaniment Follow Us on Socials: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter (X) | LinkedIn

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Podcast details

Created by: Dr. Gregory Bottaro
Status: Active
Latest episode: Nov 10, 2026
Episodes: 305
Release period: Weekly
Avg. episode length: 46 min
Explicit: No
Language: English

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