Gwenna Laithland and Tori Phantom

Childproof

A Parenting and Kids & Family podcast Explicit

#29 in Parenting · 🇵🇭 #93 in Parenting · 🇺🇸

About the show

Parenting is hard, but it's even harder when you feel alone and have only the sounds of Cocomelon to keep you company. Childproof is a parenting chat show for when you’re craving adult conversation. As parents to three kids each, co-hosts Gwenna Laithland and Tori Phantom have been there. They know that sometimes our kids are the ones on the verge of a tantrum, and that sometimes it’s us. Childproof attempts to figure out the dos, don’ts, and f*ck its of modern parenthood. From yelling at your kids (we’ve all done it) to finding a sleep schedule that doesn’t ruin your life, Gwenna and Tori share the challenges they’ve faced and the lessons they’ve learned, and are eager to share their experiences through a mix of one-on-one conversations, guest appearances, and input from listeners revealing their own parenting secrets. Clearly, we could use some help from everyone and their mother.

Newest episodes

Rewind & Repeat

Oct 21, 2026 52 min

Tori and Gwenna are bad at calendars, not at managing their own but at coordinating with each other. So this week we're revisiting some moments from Childproof past but next episode we'll be back. In the meantime, be sure to send us your questions, stories, jokes or whatever else you want us to know: childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s All Millennials Fault. All of It.

Oct 7, 2026 46 min

If you don’t like this episode of Childproof, it’s probably our fault. Not because we’re the hosts and responsible for making this show listenable but because we’re millennials. We ruin everything else. Apparently. Listen, we’d love to retire. We’re trying. We really just want to be left alone with our children. Be those children, pets, or plants. Please, we’re begging you. Forget us. Remember Gen X. Forget the millennials. We’re tired. We’re very very tired. Oh and there was some stuff about linguistics again because apparently we can’t leave it alone. And more emails because everyone loves emails. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Parenting Linguistics?

Sep 23, 2026 48 min

Do you call it a trolley, a buggy, or a cart? Soda, pop, or coke? On this episode of Childproof we discuss language quirks, regional dialects, and, just for a little bit, remember this is a parenting podcast and somehow pigeonhole our random off-topic wanderings back into the parenting communication sphere. If your kid is developing an accent, do you teach them a neutral pronunciation anyway? We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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All episodes

Rewind & Repeat

Oct 21, 2026 52 min

It’s All Millennials Fault. All of It.

Oct 7, 2026 46 min

Parenting Linguistics?

Sep 23, 2026 48 min

Into The School Year

Sep 9, 2026 53 min

Ever feel like the days bleed together and you’re not sure how time works anymore? That’s how Tori and Gwenna felt most of the summer. Tuesday? What is that? Feels fake. But now that school is back in session, time has gone less wibbly wobbly. It’s not making more sense because it’s still kids and those, generally speaking, rarely make sense. (Well, by adult standards anyway, but we aren’t ready for that conversation…). Also for the record, Gwenna would like it known these Show descriptions have begun to blur and she no longer knows what she’s supposed to be doing with them. Hence this one looking like…*this*? We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are We Raising Villains?

Aug 26, 2026 46 min

On this episode of Childproof, Parasocial Parenting, we discuss if our kids are actually growing up to be villains and how to successfully tell our children they actually suck. (Well, not that they suck but that their book is really very bad.) There’s a muddy bit in the beginning where we distracted ourselves with weather but if you slog through that bit, it gets better. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

K-Pop Demon Hunters Backpacks Will Ruin Us

Aug 12, 2026 46 min

It’s our back to school not at all special perfectly regular episode because while the children are returning to school, we didn’t actually put any effort into making a special to celebrate. We’ve just been trying to survive the last vestiges of summer. From the battles we know we’re about to fight about backpacks to tainted school pick up mirror tags to a whole bunch of other stuff we had no idea we were going to bring up, we’re talking back to school. (And for those of you with September returns to the the classroom. Strength and honor are yours.) Gwenna’s newest book We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Summertime Sadness?

Jul 29, 2026 49 min

Having kids doesn’t magically make you immune to depression, seasonal or otherwise. And no one wants to believe you when you say summertime makes you sad. But we believe you. We believe you because we also get the summertime SADS. This episode we discuss parenting while blue, while struggling, while barely hanging on and still getting stuff done. It’s okay to not be okay. You do need to reach out for help. And sometimes just mentioning “I’m not okay” is the hardest step to endure. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Facetime?

Jul 15, 2026 54 min

Today's episode of Childproof is brought to you by Gwenna and Tori taking a little summertime break. Please enjoy hearing a preview of our preshows, we'll be back again with regular episodes next time. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Baby Time?

Jul 1, 2026 46 min

Parenting via email. That’s what the podcast is now. And this episode covers chalk-covered mascots, a discussion on if we love our kids enough, when is the right time to have a baby (and no, neither of us is pregnant. Both of us are fixed, thank you.), and when and how to work through big feelings with your kids. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Toddlers & Teenagers

Jun 17, 2026 56 min

On this episode of Childproof: Parasocial Parenting we discuss mushroom allergies, mascots that are not in any way shape or form mascots but Gwenna nicknames everything inappropriately, and how toddlers and teenagers are alike but different. Also we discuss how gentle parenting doesn’t mean never being mean. It just means being mean with purpose and intent and realizing that your kids can be mad even if you’re being gentle. This week’s mascot is the weird leaf bowl apparently common in Germany. Germany, sound off…is this yours? Is there one of these sitting in your home somewhere? Are you German or of German heritage? We need to know. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Very Dangerous Butterflies

Jun 3, 2026 50 min

The start of summer means more kids everywhere. If your kids aren’t in school yet you have no sympathy. We understand. But ours are home and we love them very much and miss quiet things and alone time. Two things can be true. This episode we talk about acceptable risks, overprotecting, sticker books, a dog dressed as a butterfly, and projects and assignments neither Tori nor Gwenna have done. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mom's Got RBF

May 20, 2026 51 min

This week on Childproof’s Parasocial Parenting we’re talking about uniforms for motherhood (Spoiler: There isn’t one.), Gwenna’s pathological demand avoidance about a webtoon, Mom RBF, realistic expectations of becoming an adult, planning for the near future and letting forever take care of itself. If you’d like to influence us email us at childproofmail@gmail.com We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You Have Questions We Have Answers

May 6, 2026 54 min

Tori and Gwenna are very much enjoying and appreciating all of your emails and comments; keep them coming and we'll keep this going. Also, watch The Amazing Digital Circus and then try to convince Gwenna to watch too. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Parasocial Parenting

Apr 22, 2026 55 min

Childproof is changing for the better because it will now include more of all of you! We have always loved hearing from all of you and reading your emails. We want to hear from you more now than ever. It's not like every episode is going to be an email roundup, it's more like an extension of the virtual village and we are so excited to share more than our own thoughts. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Get your copy of Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Find The Amazing Digital Circus Here Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Road Rage

Apr 8, 2026 36 min

Yet another episode sponsored in part by MacMillan Audio because they produced Gwenna’s latest book, Thinky Thoughts All Grown Up & Still Just as Confused. You can listen to the full version come April 14th but for now, please enjoy just one more essay. This one is road rage and involves bricks, land boats, cloud-haired women in sensible shoes, and the root of a good chunk of Gwenna’s car-based anxiety. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Get a free cookbook of bonus recipes inspired by Thinky Thoughts. Free with proof of preorder! ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Creamed Corn

Apr 1, 2026 39 min

This episode of Childproof is sponsored in part by MacMillan Audio. Gwenna’s new book Thinky Thoughts hits shelves April 14th and MacMillan Audio produced her audiobook. Gwenna will read her own book to you. And you get a sample here on Childproof. Enjoy this complete essay Creamed Corn from Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just as Confused. Is creamed corn a thinly veiled reference to grown up times? No, it’s a blatant reference to that time Gwenna though she could make creamed corn with cream of celery soup. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: ⁠⁠Childproofmail@gmail.com⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get a free cookbook of bonus recipes inspired by Thinky Thoughts. ⁠Free with proof of preorder!⁠ ⁠⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠⁠ Video version of ⁠⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yeehaw! Email Roundup

Mar 25, 2026 51 min

It’s time for another round of enjoying our mutual parasocial relationships with our listeners! We’ve asked you questions. You’ve answered them. We’re reading some of them. And then using your answers to explore tangents that may or may not have anything to do with anything. At the end of every episode we invite you to email us with questions, suggestions, or things we should know. We shamelessly turn that into episodes. Want to be a part. Email us. We might shamelessly turn it into an episode. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Get a free cookbook of bonus recipes inspired by Thinky Thoughts. Free with proof of preorder! Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What Happened?

Mar 11, 2026 47 min

After a pause. And a break. And a distinct lack of explaining ourselves. And another break. We’re back. This time with an explanation of exactly what happened. The winds of change are blowing and we’re excited to see where they take us all! We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Childproof Untold

Feb 25, 2026 51 min

On this episode of Childproof Gwenna and Tori discuss things. Okay, full disclosure for the seventeen people that read notes and descriptions, we recorded this and then Oklahoma and Kentucky both exploded with influenza. Everyone was sick. Stuff got paused while we all healed. It was rough. No one had any fun. Show notes didn’t get written and by the time they got back to it Gwenna, who writes the descriptions forgot what we talked about and Tori, who edits the episodes cannot be trusted to write descriptions. So now you know this is a podcast hosted and run by two people who have no idea what they are doing and should be better at this by now. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So Now It's A Problem

Feb 11, 2026 54 min

Tori only thought they were losing it. Their snow continues and we decided to scour the internet for what they are saying about parents in the media. Did you know Warren Buffett was a gentle parent? Who knew? And then we spend most of the rest of the episode being very millennial and complaining about a Buzzfeed article. It’s not so much complaining as pointing out how it’s wrong a bunch. So like I said, being very millennial about it. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Snow Problem

Feb 4, 2026 48 min

White people talking about the weather, weird Barbies, transmogrifying spoons, fork licking, crutches, clutter, hoarding, and lying. Somehow that’s all in this episode. Tori and Gwenna have gone stir crazy I. The ale of the winter storm that swept the nation and this episode is the proof of that. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content⁠ Video version of ⁠Childproof available on Youtube ⁠ Be sure to check out our other show ⁠⁠Founded⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Never-Ending January

Jan 28, 2026 55 min

January is still here. Because it won’t leave. Why won’t it leave? Why does every January seem to last five years? On this episode of childproof Gwenna and Tori discuss snow days and library perks. Art contests and alarm clocks. But mostly we just keeping waiting for January to be done. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check out our other show ⁠Founded⁠ ⁠Preorder Gwenna's new book⁠ Click here to find the ice cream ball Gwenna mentioned Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We Have A Confession

Jan 21, 2026 52 min

Okay yes fine. We admit it. Sometimes we make meals our whole families enjoy and sometimes we make five different dishes, one for each human in the house. We do it because we can. Because it’s not that hard. Because not every moment needs to be a teachable one. And sometimes just getting dinner down their gullet is worth not fighting an entire war over a dang pea. We also admit a whole bunch of other stuff. Like how much more therapy we need and how we can’t take complements on this episode of Childproof. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check out our other show ⁠Founded⁠ Find Gwenna's books here: Field Guide to Responsive Parenting Soul's Guide to the After Death Thinky Thoughts Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Books, babies, and Befores & Afters

Jan 14, 2026 56 min

The new year is always ripe with promise of change. But these changes were inevitable. On this episode of Childproof we’re talking books, baby fever (no neither of us are having more babies, relax) and how to handle body acceptance and changes to our bodies without making a negative change. Framing self improvement as just that. Improvement. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Click here to find: The Bird The Bees and The Elephant In The Room Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Return to Routine

Jan 7, 2026 52 min

It’s been a wonderful holiday break. We are spirited out though and looking forward to our spawn going and hanging out with other folks for a hot second. From grinning and bearing our kids’ tastes in media to when you’re forced to take your own parenting advice FOR yourself, returning to routine is important and this episode of Childproof really hammers that down. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Find Gwennas's novella, The Soul's Guide to the After Death here Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Montage

Dec 31, 2025 49 min

This is the episode that isn’t an episode but is made of parts of all the other episodes that were episodes even if they were weird episodes. A full episode of minisodes? Anyway Gwenna and Tori are spending their holiday with their family and will have plenty to talk about after the break. Please enjoy this montage of our favorite clips and moments. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Basically Facetime

Dec 24, 2025 47 min

It’s another preshow preview. And a montage. Who doesn’t love a montage? Yes we did one of these but we aren’t very good at planning and this one isn’t the same as the one a few months ago. Our Patrons and paid subscribers get these little treats served to them every week. It’s basically a FaceTime between Tori and I. We typically have to explain that folks should lower there expectation for what their getting in exchange for their support. But we don’t have to disclaimer that this time. You can see for yourself. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Winter Break Survival Tips

Dec 17, 2025 52 min

Winter break is upon us in the northern hemisphere. (Happy summer to our Southern Hemisphere listeners) We’ve got holidays and school breaks and kids everywhere. With so much to do there’s still somehow room for boredom. This podcast episode is full of boredom busters of all variety to not just survive the break but to thrive, enjoy your time, and keep everyone happily busy. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holiday Email Round Up

Dec 10, 2025 50 min

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. The time when we read your emails and chat. Gwenna and Tori have been asking listeners to share their favorite Christmas, holiday, and winter memories with us. For this email round up we share a selection of the hundreds of stories we received. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Video version of Childproof available on Youtube Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Becoming An Artist With Scott Sava

Dec 3, 2025 51 min

What does it take to become an artist? How much are you standing in your own way? This week Tori and Gwenna welcome artist (and now author) Scott Christian Sava. Scott Sava is an artist, illustrator, and creator from Yonkers New York. His animated film Animal Crackers is on Netflix starring John Krasinski and an all-star cast. He’s worked on Spider Man Comics, Star Trek art, and The Dreamland Chronicles comics, written for his sons. He lives in a Hobbit Hole and has just released his new book: Becoming an Artist: How to Make Art Like a Human, Embracing Failure, discovering your creative voice, and finding joy in the process available everywhere you find your favorite books. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Find Scott Sava's book Becoming An Artist Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holiday Movie Review

Nov 26, 2025 45 min

It’s the holiday season and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Your friendly neighborhood podcasts hosts little bit forgot they’d be insanely busy in the lead up to Thanksgiving in the US. So you get a preshow run long. If you’re a former subscriber you’ll recognize this chaos for what it is. Tori and Gwenna being odd and barely having their ish together. From behind the scenes info to an in depth discussion of parenting in Christmas movies this episode is a lot of something and nothing and everything. Happy Thanksgiving. We want to hear from you, let us know how you feel about Christmas movies! Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Join our Patreon Preorder Gwenna's new book Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage This is an Airwave Media podcast. To advertise on this podcast please email Advertising@airwavemedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Ghost of Holiday Spirit

Nov 19, 2025 50 min

The holidays can be hard. From schedules to budgets, magic to mayhem, there’s a lot. All the time. It feels like we kick a ball down the hill October first and then spend a full 120 days chasing it back down. How do you maintain that holiday spirit for the long haul? Should you or is that a more unrealistic expectation of perfection? And when everything feels heavy, how do you keep it light for the kids? We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Preorder Gwenna's new book: https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/thinky-thoughts-9781250390028/ Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yep Still Mad About It

Nov 12, 2025 54 min

It turns out one episode of being mad wasn’t enough. We’re still mad but we are working through it. Anger isn’t taboo but it is hard to work with. Tori and Gwenna discuss the language they use to normalize all the big, heavy, negative emotions. It’s alright to feel frustrated but we don’t have to stay there. You’re right to be mad but is the mad helping or is it keeping you stuck. We want to hear from you! Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Vote for our new logo! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1vj5yOzM9u9AyLW4iWbUKs7-KG3LpSZ8vPoP9GrYrNr4/edit Preorder Gwenna's new book: Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Get your holiday Bones coffee! ⁠https://www.bonescoffee.com/CHILDPROOF⁠ This is an Airwave Media podcast. To advertise on this podcast please email Advertising@airwavemedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Stay Mad About It

Nov 5, 2025 51 min

Does getting mad make you bad? Absolutely not. A lot of folks grew up being told to bottle up their feelings and that carries long term consequences. The cycle breakers are trying to uncork their own bottles while helping their kids avoid the bottling thing altogether. We’re like really messed up genies. Only we can’t grant wishes. On this episode of childproof we talk about when we can feel all those big, hard, heavy feelings and when we can suppress them (and how to safely do that without becoming exactly like our parents.) We want to hear from you! Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Vote for our new logo! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1vj5yOzM9u9AyLW4iWbUKs7-KG3LpSZ8vPoP9GrYrNr4/edit Get your holiday Bones coffee! https://www.bonescoffee.com/CHILDPROOF Preorder Gwenna's new book: Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused Be sure to check out our other podcasts: Founded Bibliophage This is an Airwave Media podcast. To advertise on this podcast please email Advertising@airwavemedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hearing Vs. Listening

Oct 29, 2025 51 min

On today’s episode of childproof, we hear you. No. Really, we do. Yeah, we’re doing all the talking but it’s a podcast. This one is about listening though and sometimes, as parents, it’s hard to feel heard while also active listening. So, no we can’t actually hear you but we can discuss active listening and some of the wild things we have to active listen to our children say. And sometimes correct cuz, No, buddy. The library isn’t full of lies. (Context included in the episode.) We want to hear from you! Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Vote for our new logo! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1vj5yOzM9u9AyLW4iWbUKs7-KG3LpSZ8vPoP9GrYrNr4/edit Get your holiday Bones coffee! https://www.bonescoffee.com/CHILDPROOF Preorder Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/thinky-thoughts-9781250390028/ Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fire, Knives, and Other Things to Give Kids

Oct 22, 2025 49 min

Parenting with and through anxiety can give a person anxiety. How do I overcome my irrational (and sometimes rational) fears to let my children grow up with a healthy relationship with their own fear and anxiety? If being a worrywart is contagious, how do I make sure I’m avoiding anxious sneezing all over my kids? A few mental tricks, a few just biting down and doing it scared, and a little exposure therapy has worked for Gwenna and Tori. Join them as they discuss parenting with anxiety and what’s worked for them and what is still really hard to navigate. We want to hear from you! Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Vote for our new logo! Get your holiday Bones coffee! Preorder Gwenna's new book Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage This is an Airwave Media podcast. To advertise on this podcast please email Advertising@airwavemedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Decision Fatigue

Oct 15, 2025 56 min

What do you mean I have to choose every meal I eat for the rest of my life? What do you mean I’m responsible for choosing what most everyone in this house eats for the foreseeable future? And I have to pick outfits. And extracurriculars. And snacks. And bedtimes. And time management. And that’s a lot of choices and I do not feel qualified to make them. Shouldn’t someone more responsible and wise be making these choices? Decision fatigue is very real and Tori and Gwenna are discussing how tired they are of choosing. (Including what to choose to talk about on this show sometimes.) We want to hear from you, what is your least favorite decision to make? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Vote for our new logo! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1vj5yOzM9u9AyLW4iWbUKs7-KG3LpSZ8vPoP9GrYrNr4/edit Preorder Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just As Confused https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/thinky-thoughts-9781250390028/ Be sure to check out our other shows: ⁠Founded⁠ ⁠Bibliophage⁠ Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Scariest Childproof Ever

Oct 8, 2025 49 min

Spooky season has begun which means many of us are beginning to shop for Halloween costumes. Unless you’re like tori in which case you’ve got weeks until you have to worry about it. Mood, honestly. This episode we discuss how Halloween costumes trigger Gwenna’s childhood trauma, how to help your kid deal with comparisons, overcompensating, and projecting. (Okay well, the projecting this is mostly on the parents but it makes sense in the episode. Descriptions are hard, mmkay?) We want to hear from you! What are your thoughts on Halloween costumes and/or what was your best costume ever? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Pre-order Gwenna’s new book (It helps a lot with the whole projecting your trauma thing, I promise.) Be sure to check out our other fantastic podcast and other titles from Airwave Media: Founded Bibliophage Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact ⁠advertising@airwavemedia.com⁠ if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Email Roundup

Oct 1, 2025 41 min

It’s that time again. Tori and Gwenna dive into the inbox and the comment sections to see what you really want to talk about. From over-thinking (which we are professionals at) to bathing in children’s tears, we cover a lot of ground. We’re just following your lead here. We love email round ups because it always makes us feel a little less alone. A little less odd. A little more comforted that if we’re tired, at least that’s how everyone feels. Pre-order Gwenna’s new book (that’s more of not feeling quite so alone, overwhelmed, and confused because at least we all feel that way) Be sure to check out our other fantastic podcasts and other titles from Airwave Media! Founded Bibliophage Childproof is an Airwave Media podcast. To advertise on this podcast please email Advertising@airwavemedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Complain Chain

Sep 24, 2025 52 min

Human beings are sort of built to complain. It helps us regulate, it can make us feel better, and it sometimes helps us work out a solution to whatever we’re complaining about. But there’s a limit to everything and the limit for complaining is pretty low. When you get stuck in a complain chain, it can feel impossible to get out of that negative cycle of thinking. How do you break yourself and your kids out of a complain chain so you can focus on finding solutions instead of just whining about them? On this episode of Childproof, we discuss ways to acknowledge without dismissing and complain without whining. We want to hear from you. Have some good news or complaints to share? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.comSubscribe for preshow bonus content Preorder Gwenna's new book, Thinky Thoughts Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Over Protected

Sep 17, 2025 50 min

A recent Harris Poll found as released and had internet parents in an uproar. Tori and Gwenna had a bit of a different take. In a data driven world, how do you cut through the click bait headlines to see what the data is actually describing. Do we have a long series of struggles helping our kids navigate tech? Sure. Is it a huge problem that kids aren’t building forts outside anymore? Maybe not as big a problem as the reporting would have us believe. In this episode of Childproof Gwenna and Tori take on helicopters. (Spoiler: We win.) Link to the poll We want to hear from you, what do you think about these statistics? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Subscribe for preshow bonus content Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Preorder Gwenna's new book Thinky Thoughts Childproof is a part of the Airwave Media network. Please contact advertising@airwavemedia.com if you would like to advertise on our podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello From The Other Side

Sep 10, 2025 51 min

Hello from the other side of some of the things we thought our kids would never grow out of. Parents of young children are often told “Cherish it! You’ll miss it when it’s gone and they’re grown!” Right, so there’s merit to that but there are a bunch of things that we definitely will not miss. Diapers, waiting 7-10 business days for them to “dood it meself,” or the constant binkie battle probably aren’t worth missing. Sure, our kids will grow up and move on but that’s the point. Also in this episode: feelings wheel. Because when is feelings wheel not appropriate? Can’t think of a time, personally. We want to hear from you! What phase did you feel like your kids would never grow out of? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Become a member for preshow bonus content Be sure to check out our other shows: Founded Bibliophage This is an Airwave Media Podcast Please contact advertising@airwavemedia.com if you would like to advertise on our podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Unfinished Sentences

Sep 3, 2025 52 min

Part of parenting is realizing you’ll almost never get to complete a sentence. Or a thought. At least during certain ages and stages. Constant interruptions, whether your kids meant to or not. They are just little distraction machines and can’t always help it. Luckily Tori and Gwenna are easily distracted by everything. Including their own podcast. This episode is a bit of a mixed bag covering all those loose ends we left dangling in previous episodes. Stinking timer always interrupting us. (Spoiler alert, the timer interrupts us again.) We want to hear from you! Let us know how you handle interrupting, what type of Childproof episode is your favorite and/or anything else you want to share: childproofmail@gmail.com Get more bones: https://www.bonescoffee.com/CHILDPROOF Preorder Gwenna’s New Book (On PreOrder Sale Sept 3-5 with code PREORDER only at Barnes and Noble) Subscribe for bonus preshow content Be sure to check out our other shows: Bibliophage Founded Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Retro Parenting

Aug 27, 2025 55 min

Millennials are notorious for really cherishing their nostalgia. We can’t help it. We had really cool things. And we long for simpler times. But not too simple. A new parenting trend is emerging that blends modern convenience and invention with the laid back vibe of the 90s. From landline phones making a comeback to wiping the floor with your own progeny on MarioKart, Tori and Gwenna discuss Retro Parenting and how we’re already sort of accidentally been doing a lot of it. Because we are incredibly nostalgic millennials. Now pass the rubber band ball and untangle the phone cord before mom gets mad. We want to hear from you! Let us know what you think of retro parenting, email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Pre-order Gwenna's new book, Thinky Thoughts Subscribe for preshow bonus content Be sure to check our other shows: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Independence

Aug 20, 2025 53 min

Much of raising kids is fostering, dealing with, and cleaning up from our kids doing stuff “by themself”. Our goal, among others, is to parent ourselves out of a job which means letting them try, fail, revise, and try again. But as our kids get older those fails get fewer and far between and they start realizing all this independence we’ve been letting them practice with was for a reason. They are going to actually grow up and be independent. For real for real. But that doesn’t mean they have to be alone. We want to hear from you. Got a funny story, a question or anything else you'd like to share? E-mail us: childproofmail@gmail.com Subscribe for pre-show bonus content Be sure to check out the other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Back To School Special

Aug 13, 2025 56 min

It’s back to school season and that means it’s time to talk a lot about going back to school. On this episode of Childproof, we tackle that it’s alright to feel relieved that these kids are not going to be in your house all dang day. We discuss how various communities support us and our kids. And then we tackle phone bans and why we don’t think that’s the issue to the problem. Or even the problem with need to be addressing. We want to hear from you! How do you feel about back to school season? What are your opinions on phone bans? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Mental health resources: https://www.nami.org/ therapyden.com Subscribe for pre-show bonus content Be sure to check out the other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Change and Challenge

Aug 6, 2025 57 min

What’s in a name? Turns out we’ve been debating that for a hot second. On the heels of a Wall Street Journal piece comparing “Gentle Parenting” with “FAFO Parenting” Tori and Gwenna discuss the difference (Is there one? *shrug*) They also discuss some visual and production changes upcoming for Childproof as the podcast enters its next era. Ever wondered why Childproof parted ways with our old production company? This is the episode they spill the tea. For more information on Gentle Parenting, no matter what you call it, check out Gwenna’s Book Subscribe for Bonus Pre-Show Content We want to hear from you, what labels feel best for your style of parenting? How do you feel about "FAFO parenting"? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Be sure to check out the other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Countdown

Jul 30, 2025 48 min

Summer is slowly winding itself down and many of us look forward to sending our precious womb fruit to school. Tori and Gwenna certainly are. But they are also waist deep in back to school shopping, gathering supplies, and deciding whether they’ll have a growth spurt before or after we buy back to school clothes. This episode is an email round up to share some of our emails and comments with the whole class. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com Subscribe for bonus pre-show content In the episode we reference the WorldCat link to see where Gwenna’s books are available to borrow near you and here’s that link Get 10% off Bones Coffee using code Childproof10 Be sure to check out the other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Founded Bibliophage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mom Mantras

Jul 23, 2025 53 min

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a hundred times… we all have phrases that are said in repeat. And things our kids will VOW never to say to their own progeny (they probably will but in a different way but whatever, you can be right, kid.) Ultimately, repetition is how humans learn. And she children are just humans in beta mode, we repeat ourselves. Kids are people who aren’t good at being people yet so we have to say the same things over and over again. Our job is not to raise good kids but to raise good adults which means we spend a lot of time repetitively repeating ideas. (See what I did there.). This episode of Childproof we discuss the mantras in our house on repeat. Here's that Feelings Wheel we mentioned We want to hear from you, what are your mom mantras or just mantras you use in general? Email us: childproofmail@gmail.com Subscribe for bonus Pre-Show content Be sure to check out the other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Bibliophage Founded Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Media Readiness

Jul 16, 2025 47 min

Is your kid ready to watch Deadpool? Good news. That’s your call. Bad news. We probably won’t help very much in deciding. This episode Tori and Gwenna discuss ways we think about media, movies, music, books, and internet for our kids. When are they old enough to understand what they are looking at? How do you know when a movie isn’t going to give them nightmares? Can movies teach about empathy? We aren’t discussing censorship. We are discussing discernment, media readiness, and helping ease our kid into the made-up craziness of entertainment media. We want to hear from you, how do you determine if your kiddo is ready for something new? We also have an email roundup coming soon, send us your questions, jokes, ideas or anything else: childproofmail@gmail.com Become a Member for Preshow Bonus Content Other shows from Pleasant Phantom Productions: Bibliophage Founded Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Podcast details

Created by: Gwenna Laithland and Tori Phantom
Status: Active
Latest episode: Oct 21, 2026
Episodes: 164
Release period: Every two weeks
Avg. episode length: 47 min
Explicit: Yes
Language: English

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