Abby and Amy

HERself

A Parenting , Kids & Family and Health & Fitness podcast

#38 in Parenting · 🇺🇸 #61 in Parenting · 🇨🇦

About the show

As women and mothers of young children, it can be easy to compare ourselves to others. But your life isn't supposed to look like hers! Being your best self means standing firm in your decisions and always being willing to grow with a purpose. Are you wanting more ease in your marriage? Or more enjoyment as a parent? Are you looking for a strategy to the health challenges you have been facing recently? Do you feel like you have been staring at a stranger in the mirror since becoming a mother? Abby and Amy get vulnerable with topics around partnership, motherhood, health, and self improvement by interviewing authors, therapists, experts and everyday mothers. Our conversations will meet you with solutions and solidarity as you find a life path that feels aligned for you. If this sounds like you, hit play on your favorite episode title and make sure you're following the HERself podcast.

Newest episodes

363: How to Make, Keep, and Strengthen Friendships as an Adult with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer

Nov 9, 2026 53 min

Friendships are some of the most important relationships in our lives, but they can also bring up a lot of uncomfortable feelings. We're welcoming back clinical psychologist and friendship expert Dr. Miriam Kirmayer to talk through some of the harder parts of adult friendships and how we can navigate them with more confidence and intention. From feeling left out or comparing ourselves to other friends to worrying about saying the wrong thing, Dr. Miriam shares practical ways to build stronger connections, show up for the people we care about, and give ourselves a little more grace along the way. Key Topics Covered: Moving beyond small talk and building deeper connectionsNavigating jealousy, comparison, and feelings of exclusionUnderstanding how we naturally show up when friends need supportLetting go of perfectionism and making more room for connectionHaving difficult conversations that strengthen friendships CONNECT WITH DR. MIRIAM: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miriamkirmayer/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/miriam-kirmayer/ Website: https://www.miriamkirmayer.com/ Podcast: Two Peas on a Pod https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-peas-on-a-pod/id1896333236 Listen to Dr. Miriam’s previous episode on HERself: 159: Why Adult Friendships are Hard and How to Make Them Work with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000589836558 LINKS AND RESOURCES: UNCOMMON GOODS: 15% off your next gift at uncommongoods.com/herself FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

362: Everything Women Should Know About Perimenopause with Carmen Stansberry, NP

Nov 2, 2026 41 min

We’re thrilled to welcome back Carmen Stansberry, a double board-certified nurse practitioner, for a conversation all about perimenopause. With more than 20 years of experience across women’s health, fertility, hormones, and functional medicine, Carmen brings a wealth of knowledge to help us better understand what’s happening in our bodies during this transition. We’re breaking down the symptoms we might not recognize, how hormonal changes can affect everything from our sleep and mood to our metabolism and mental health, and why our experiences can look so different from one woman to the next. Carmen also shares lifestyle changes that can help us support our bodies, what to know about hormone therapy, and how to advocate for ourselves when seeking care. Key Topics Covered Early signs and stages of perimenopauseThe connection between hormones, blood sugar, and sleepLifestyle habits that support long-term healthThe role hormone therapy can play during perimenopauseFinding knowledgeable providers and advocating for our health CONNECT WITH CARMEN: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carmen.stansberry.np Substack: https://carmenstansberry.substack.com/ Listen to Carmen’s previous episode on HERself: 348: The Longevity Tips Every Woman Needs to Hear with Carmen Stansberry, NP: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000778517524 LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

361: Want Mom Friends? Our Best Advice

Oct 26, 2026 30 min

Making mom friends can look different as we get older and our kids get more involved in sports, school, and other activities. Today, we’re talking about how we’ve learned to put ourselves out there, build connections in our community, and make room for new friendships without feeling like every person needs to become a best friend. We’re sharing what’s worked for us, what we’ve had to work on, and why making the effort is worth it. Key Topics Covered Getting out of your comfort zone and making small efforts to connectNot taking it personally when someone doesn’t seem interestedKnowing the difference between your inner circle and other friendshipsFollowing up and finding simple ways to build stronger connectionsBeing a friendship builder and helping others feel included LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

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All episodes

The newest 50 of 363 episodes

363: How to Make, Keep, and Strengthen Friendships as an Adult with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer

Nov 9, 2026 53 min

362: Everything Women Should Know About Perimenopause with Carmen Stansberry, NP

Nov 2, 2026 41 min

361: Want Mom Friends? Our Best Advice

Oct 26, 2026 30 min

360: Raising Resilient Kids: Navigating Friendships, Conflict & Rejection with Amy Miller

Oct 19, 2026 32 min

Our kids’ friendships can be complicated, and as moms, it’s hard to know when to step in and when to let them figure things out on their own. Today we’re talking with Amy Miller, an elementary school counselor who has worked with more than 500 kids, about how we can help our kids navigate friendship changes, rejection, and conflict while building the confidence to work through challenges themselves. Plus, we’re learning why friendship struggles are a normal part of growing up and how the lessons our kids are learning about friendship are ones we can use in our own lives, too. Key Topics Covered The four types of “friends” to stay away fromNavigating friendship groups of three and feelings of being left outHow to recognize the difference between conflict, mean behavior, and bullyingTeaching kids about trust, privacy, and sharing personal information CONNECT WITH AMY: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/school_counselor_mama Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/School-Counselor-Mama-61561534478910/ Check out Amy’s resources and ebooks here: https://beacons.ai/school_counselor_mama Codes for her ebooks: Calm Minds, Happy Homes, use code CALM20 for 20% off From Guessing to Knowing: How To Raise An Emotionally Open Kid, use code OPEN20 for 20% off Amy’s Friendship Freebie: https://schoolcounselormama.com/shop/c52ca413-3a83-428c-96e9-3c5fab5b0a89 Amy’s children’s book, Made of Strong Stuff: https://www.boundtobetold.com/stories/made-of-strong-stuff/overview Use code PODCAST15 for 15% off LINKS AND RESOURCES: Patreon Book Club: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast SITKA SEAFOOD: Visit https://sitkaseafoodmarket.com/pages/herself for $35 Off + free salmon burgers for a year with a continuous subscription. The code HERSELF25 should auto-apply when using this link Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.co...

359: How to Be a More Resilient Person

Oct 12, 2026 31 min

Today we’re talking about resilience and what it actually looks like to become a more resilient person, especially on the days when life feels overwhelming. After listening to a podcast about what mentally strong people do on their worst days, we pulled out the ideas that really resonated with us and shared how we’re applying them to our own lives. We’re talking about why avoiding the things that stress us out usually doesn’t make us feel better, how questioning our thoughts can help us get out of black-and-white thinking, and why taking small steps forward can make a bigger difference than waiting for time to heal everything. We also get into the difference between feeling our feelings and ruminating on them, and how the hard things we’ve experienced can ultimately show us just how capable we are. Key Topics Covered Why “mental health days” might not be as restorative as we thinkMoving from avoidance to small, manageable actionHow the way we label ourselves can shape how we see ourselvesScheduling time to worry instead of letting worry take overFinding the gift in experiences we never would have chosen LINKS AND RESOURCES: AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Listen to the podcast that inspired this episode: What Mentally Strong People Do on Their Worst Days with Psychotherapist Amy Morin on A Bit of Optimism with Simon Sinek https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/what-mentally-strong-people-do-on-their-worst-days/id1515385282?i=1000791062156 Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

358: This Hack Could Change Your Life

Oct 5, 2026 32 min

We all have those little tasks that we say we’ll do later, but what if there were a simple way to finally get them done? In this episode, we’re breaking down the idea of a “dreadsprint,” a simple way to batch those annoying, lingering tasks and finally get them off your mental list. We’re talking about why these unfinished tasks can take up so much mental energy, how we each approach them very differently, and how you can create a system that actually works for your personality. If you’ve got a list of things you’ve been avoiding, this might be the motivation you need to knock them out. Key Topics Covered The difference between a dreadsprint and a typical to-do listFinding the right approach based on your personality and tendenciesUsing batching, timers, and small rewards to make dreaded tasks easierWhy completing a task fully can help close the loop in your brainMaking your own health, appointments, and responsibilities a priority LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Patreon Book Club: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Listen to episode 337: Do You Actually Want to Change? Listen to This with Karin Nordin: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000767168604 Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

357: Abby's Issues Explored: Part 1

Sep 28, 2026 41 min

In this episode, we’re diving into something that Abby has struggled with for most of her life: the feeling that she’s never doing enough. Whether it’s parenting, work, or her home, she shares how she can hit one goal and immediately move the bar higher, which makes it hard to actually feel proud of what she’s accomplished or be present in the moment. We talk about where this drive comes from, how it can turn into overfunctioning and burnout, and what it looks like to start letting go of the constant pressure to do more. She's still figuring this out, but Abby's learning that being “enough” isn’t something she can achieve. It’s something she has to decide. Key Topics Covered: The connection between achievement, praise, and belongingHow comparison can fuel negative self-talkWhy rest and play can feel uncomfortable for high achieversPrompts to help redefine your priorities and recognize when you’re already doing enoughLetting go of perfection without losing the parts of yourself that make you a high achiever LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location Grab a copy of the book The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level: https://amzlink.to/az0Vz8f52wrL6 Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

356: The Most Underrated Secret to a Strong Marriage

Sep 21, 2026 31 min

We often think communication is the key to a strong marriage, but what if the real secret is friendship? In this episode, we’re talking about what it looks like to actually be friends with your spouse, how that can get lost when life gets busy and kids need more from you, and the ways we’ve each seen this play out in our own marriages. We’re also sharing some simple ways to rebuild connection that can help you find your way back to liking each other again. Key Topics Covered: How to show genuine interest in your partner’s hobbies and interestsThe mental load and how sharing responsibilities can create more room for connectionWhy small acts of kindness and quick repairs matterWays to turn toward your partner instead of away during frustrating momentsCreating more opportunities for fun and shared experiences LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself MOMCOZY: 20% off with code HERSELF https://momcozy.com/ Listen to episode 10 with Molly Millwood: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000466502777 Grab the books mentioned in the episode: To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma by Molly Millwood: https://amzlink.to/az0O8mPASBGdi Drop the Ball: Achieving More by Doing Less by Tiffany Dufu: https://amzlink.to/az0xopPThIfNo Fair Play by Eve Rodsky: https://amzlink.to/az0P01tackqJA Read the blog post from The Gottman Institute: https://www.gottman.com/blog/thirty-years-later/ Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

355: Hot Takes on Youth Sports with Chandler Ashcraft

Sep 14, 2026 35 min

Today, we’re talking all things motherhood, mindset, and youth sports with Chandler Ashcraft, the creator behind @chanwiththeboys and founder of Moms Away. Chandler brings her background in education and her experience raising four boys to the conversation, sharing why perspective can help us take the pressure off, how to set developmentally appropriate expectations for our kids, and why confidence often comes from being willing to do hard things. We also get into the reality of youth sports, from the pressure to do more to the mental load that comes with keeping everyone’s schedules moving, and how to make choices that actually fit your family. Key Topics Covered How exposure to hard moments builds confidence and resilienceTeaching kids to take ownership of their attitude, effort, and responseWhy confidence, especially for women, is built through failure and trying againHow to evaluate the tradeoffs that come with youth sportsKeeping the long game in mind when making decisions for your family CONNECT WITH CHANDLER: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chanwiththeboys TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chanwiththeboys Learn more about Moms Away: Website: https://www.momsaway.co/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moms.away LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF SITKA SEAFOOD: Visit https://sitkaseafoodmarket.com/pages/herself for $35 Off + free salmon burgers for a year with a continuous subscription. The code HERSELF25 should auto-apply when using this link Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

354: Greatest Hits: A Reframe on Jealousy

Sep 7, 2026 29 min

Since it’s Labor Day here in the U.S., we’re bringing back one of our favorite conversations on shifting jealousy and comparison into inspiration and possibility. It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other women and feeling jealous, intimidated, or like you’re somehow behind. But what if you could shift that mindset and instead feel genuinely inspired by the success around you? In this episode, we share a recent real-life experience from a mastermind we attended with highly successful business owners and how it challenged us to see comparison differently. Instead of letting the “small fish in a big sea” feeling discourage us, we used it as proof of what’s possible. We talk about the mindset shift that helped us move from comparison to inspiration, why personal growth plays a huge role in that process, and how surrounding yourself with the right people can change the way you view your own potential. In this episode, we discuss: What it felt like walking into a room full of highly successful entrepreneurs.The surprising common habits we noticed among women operating at a high level.Why taking care of your physical health often supports long-term success.The “highlight reel vs. inner life” trap and why it distorts how we see other people’s journeys.Questions to ask yourself when someone else's success triggers comparison.The hidden sacrifices and personal work that often sit behind visible success.Practical ways to shift from jealousy to curiosity and inspiration.Why your mindset about others’ success can either hold you back or move you forward.How getting support, such as a mindset coach, can help you break out of negative thought patterns.The powerful question to ask when a negative thought about someone else pops up. LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: ht...

353: Triggered by Your Kids' Behavior? This Is For You

Aug 31, 2026 27 min

Have you ever found yourself taking your child’s behavior personally, getting defensive, or reacting in a way you wish you could take back? Today, we’re talking about how the Gottman Institute’s Four Horsemen of criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling can show up in our parenting, why our kids’ emotional development means we have to take the lead when it comes to navigating conflict, and how much they learn from the way we handle hard moments. We’re not going to get it right every time, but becoming more aware of our patterns can help us model healthier communication, repair, and relationships for our kids. Key Topics Covered Why criticism can feel like an attack or humiliation to a childHow to tell the difference between taking a break and stonewallingWhy self-regulation has to come before trying to coach your child through a conflictHow to soften the start-up and communicate your feelings more clearlyThe importance of taking responsibility and modeling a genuine apology LINKS AND RESOURCES: AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u MOMCOZY: 20% off with code HERSELF https://momcozy.com/ Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

352: Feeling Unworthy? This Is For You With Dr. Marisa Franco

Aug 24, 2026 38 min

We’re so excited to welcome Dr. Marisa Franco back to the podcast for the third time to talk about something so many of us struggle with: feeling worthy. We’re diving into why simply telling ourselves to “love ourselves” doesn’t always work, how our past experiences continue to shape the way we see ourselves today, and what it can look like to meet ourselves with more understanding instead of trying to force ourselves to feel differently. We also talk about how our own self-worth impacts the way we show up for our kids and how we can help the next generation build a healthier relationship with themselves. Key Topics Covered Why insecurity can actually be an adaptive responseHow attachment theory can become another form of perfectionismWhy some people struggle to receive complimentsThe connection between self-worth, memories, and our emotional responsesHow to recognize, regulate, and respond to difficult emotions CONNECT WITH DR. MARISA FRANCO: Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmarisagfranco Check out her website: https://drmarisagfranco.com/ Pre-order Marisa’s new book, Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment here: https://amzlink.to/az0RRIqPA4gxb Listen to her past episodes on HERself: 59. The Challenge and Triumphs of Adult Friendships https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000505703230 314. Attachment Styles in Adult Friendships https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000739104904 LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF SITKA SEAFOOD: Visit https://sitkaseafoodmarket.com/pages/herself for $35 Off + free salmon burgers for a year with a continuous subscription. The code HERSELF25 should auto-apply when using this link Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrose...

351: If You Keep Having the Same Fight, Listen to This

Aug 17, 2026 31 min

What do you do when you and your partner keep having the same fight over and over again? Learning how to navigate those gridlocked arguments can help you stop spinning your wheels and start finding a way forward, even when you don’t see eye to eye. Today, we’re breaking down practical ways to approach these recurring disagreements, including how to look beneath the surface of the argument, stay connected when you don’t agree, and find a livable solution together. Because sometimes the goal isn’t to finally agree, but to learn how to handle the disagreement in a healthier way. Key Topics Covered: Why some relationship conflicts are unsolvableHow childhood experiences can shape the way we handle conflictWhy vulnerability can help you break out of a cycle of defensivenessHow to find common ground when you disagreeWhat to do when pushing for a solution isn’t working LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

350: The Money Beliefs That Are Costing You

Aug 10, 2026 50 min

Money is one of the biggest sources of conflict in relationships, but it's rarely about the money itself. This week, we unpack why couples get stuck in the same financial arguments, how our childhood experiences and money beliefs shape the way we spend and save, and what it really takes to get on the same page with your partner. We also share practical ways to have healthier money conversations, better understand each other's financial habits, and build a stronger partnership instead of keeping score. Key Topics Covered: The four common money personalities and how they influence financial decisionsWhy regular money check-ins help couples stay connected and avoid resentmentHow financial anxiety can show up as overspending, oversaving, or avoiding money altogetherThe impact of lifestyle creep, comparison, and keeping score in a relationshipFour simple questions to uncover your own money beliefs and start better conversations with your partner LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF MOMCOZY: 20% off with code HERSELF https://momcozy.com/ GOTTMAN INSTITUTE ARTICLES ABOUT MONEY: https://www.gottman.com/blog/money-bankrupting-marriage/ “MONEY MAPS” FROM THE GOTTMAN INSTITUTE: https://www.gottman.com/blog/arguments-money-arent-money/ Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

349: How To Reset Your Day: 5 Tips to Turn Things Around

Aug 3, 2026 28 min

Resetting a tough day doesn't always require a complete restart. Sometimes it's about catching an unhelpful thought, asking for what you need, or making one small change that shifts your momentum. Today we're sharing five simple ways we turn our own days around when we're feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or stuck, along with real examples from our lives that have helped us respond differently. If you've ever felt like a bad morning means the whole day is ruined, this conversation is for you. Key Topics Covered: How to identify and reframe unhelpful thought patterns before they spiralWhy taking one small action today is more powerful than waiting for tomorrowHow clearly communicating your needs can reduce resentment at homeSimple ways to build momentum by changing your environment or routineHow gratitude and remembering you're on the same team can shift your perspective LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

348: The Longevity Tips Every Woman Needs to Hear with Carmen Stansberry, NP

Jul 27, 2026 51 min

Feeling like yourself again often starts with zooming out instead of chasing the latest wellness trend. In this conversation, we sit down with Nurse Practitioner Carmen Stansberry to explore the bigger picture of women's health that focuses on the idea of longevity vs a quick fix. We cover everything, from finding the right healthcare provider to understanding hormones, inflammation, sleep, and the daily habits that have the biggest impact over time. If you've been wondering where to start when you don't feel your best, this conversation offers practical guidance to help you make informed decisions and focus on what truly moves the needle. Key Topics Covered: How to find a qualified healthcare provider who looks at the full picture instead of offering quick fixesWhat heart rate variability (HRV) can reveal about stress, hormones, and overall healthThe truth about peptides, GLP-1s, and why personalized care mattersHow inflammation affects aging and simple ways to reduce it through everyday habitsWhat to know about hormone therapy, hair health, collagen, and protein as you get olderThe best longevity tips for women CONNECT WITH CARMEN: Follow Carmen on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carmen.stansberry.np LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF MARY RUTH HAIR SUPPLEMENT: https://amzlink.to/az0kELnE6fNiV Check out episode 342: Our Unfiltered Thoughts About Turning 40, where we talk about aging and our thoughts on it: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/herself/id1489878793?i=1000772765470 Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

347: If the Summer Feels Overwhelming, Start Here

Jul 20, 2026 42 min

Summer can be one of the most fun seasons of the year, but it can also leave us feeling stretched thin. Today we're talking through the biggest sources of overwhelm our community is experiencing right now, from changing routines and packed schedules to messy houses and the pressure to make summer feel magical. We share simple mindset shifts and practical strategies that can help us adjust our expectations, focus on what matters most, and create a summer that actually works for our families. Key Topics Covered: How to create consistent routines even when every week looks differentCreative ways to make summer logistics easier, including carpools and sharing responsibilities with other familiesWhy boredom can be a gift and how to encourage kids to solve it on their ownHow to find a balance between planning enough and overscheduling your familyLetting go of guilt and remembering that kids often treasure the simplest moments most LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

346: Your In-law Issues Uncovered: Boundaries, Expectations and Listener Write-in's

Jul 13, 2026 39 min

Marriage doesn't just bring two people together. It also brings together different families, expectations, traditions, and experiences. Today we're talking honestly about some of the most common challenges that come with in-law relationships, from feeling the weight of comparison to navigating boundaries and unmet expectations. While we can't solve every complicated family dynamic, we hope this conversation reminds you that your feelings are valid, you're not alone, and you and your partner can work together to build the family culture you want. Key Topics Covered: Why comparison between grandparents is natural and how to appreciate different ways of showing loveHow healthy boundaries protect relationships instead of damaging themWays couples can stay united when navigating difficult family dynamicsPractical ideas for handling extended visits, grandparent favoritism, and differing expectationsWhy speaking up gives family members the opportunity to make positive changes LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Join us at Tricky Foods in Madison, WI on Thursday, July 30th for Moms’ Night Out! Learn more and get your ticket here: https://www.herselfpodcast.com/shop/p/herself-moms-night-out-1 Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

345: The Career Advice Every Woman Needs to Hear with Colleen Bordeaux

Jul 6, 2026 48 min

Whether you're climbing the corporate ladder, building a business, negotiating a raise, or wondering if it's time for a career change, this conversation is full of practical advice for every stage of your professional journey. We sit down with leadership coach and Growth Inc. founder Colleen Bordeaux to talk about redefining success, advocating for yourself, navigating burnout, and building a career that actually fits your life. If you've ever felt overlooked, stuck, or unsure of your next step, this episode will help you approach your career with more confidence and clarity. Key Topics Covered: Why asking for a raise starts with owning your valueHow leadership requires letting go of perfectionism and controlQuestions to ask when you're deciding whether to stay or leave your current roleWhy your career doesn't have to follow a traditional pathA different way to think about burnout and creating a more fulfilling career CONNECT WITH COLLEEN: Growth, Inc. Instagram (@growthincubator): https://www.instagram.com/growthincubator Colleen’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colleenbordeaux TikTok: https://www.instagram.com/growthincubator LINKS AND RESOURCES: FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Grab a copy of the book The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level: https://amzlink.to/az0I8iLhyyJIL Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

344: How Often Should We Be Dating Our Spouse?

Jun 29, 2026 27 min

When it comes to dating your spouse, how often should you actually be going on dates? We started asking ourselves that question and quickly realized the answer depends on your relationship, your season of life, and what helps you feel connected. We share how our own approaches to dating have evolved over the years, from weekly nights out to low effort basement dates and small moments of connection throughout the week. We also dive into the research on dating your spouse, debate what actually counts as a date, and talk about why regular check-ins matter more than following someone else's rules. Key Topics Covered: The research behind dating your spouse, including the "gold standard" of weekly dates and the 2/2/2 method.Why Amy and Drew and Abby and Colin have completely different dating styles, and how their needs have evolved as their kids and schedules have changed.The debate over whether group dates count as dates and why couples may have different definitions of quality time.How to have honest conversations with your partner about feeling connected, sharing the mental load, and getting on the same page.Why meaningful connection can happen in everyday moments and does not always require elaborate plans or expensive nights out. LINKS AND RESOURCES: FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

343: How To Deal With Your Sh#* So Your Kids Don't Have To with Eli Harwood

Jun 22, 2026 50 min

Growing up as millennials, we were often told not to be too loud, not to ask for help, and to push our feelings down. Attachment therapist and author Eli Harwood joins us to unpack how our upbringings shaped us and how we can break generational cycles as parents. Eli opens with a powerful reframe: our parents truly did the best they could with what they knew. From there, we dive deep into what childhood trauma actually looks like (and why so many of us don't recognize it as trauma), how to build resilience in our kids, and why the way we parent almost always traces back to how we were parented. Whether you struggle with patience, saying no, or knowing when to discipline versus when to have a conversation, Eli offers practical, connection-focused tools to help us show up differently for our kids. Key Topics Covered: What secure attachment looks like and why Eli centers her work on connection and relationship rather than control and behavior.How to identify the childhood experiences you may be carrying into adulthood without realizing they are traumas.Finding the middle ground between raising independent kids and raising kids who feel safe asking for help.The number one predictor of long-term resilience in children and how to actively foster it.Why millennial parents may struggle with patience, and why the birthing parent often has less of it than their non-birthing partner.Punishment versus conversation: how to rethink your approach when your child does something wrong.Why saying no feels so hard for millennial parents and what to do if you want to change that pattern. CONNECT WITH ELI: Instagram & Threads (@attachmentnerd): https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/attachmentnerd TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@attachmentnerd Get Your Copy of Eli’s Book: https://amzlink.to/az09tHmrRU6NT LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself...

342: Our Unfiltered Thoughts About Turning 40

Jun 15, 2026 33 min

Abby's 40th birthday served as the perfect launching pad for an honest conversation about aging and all the feelings that come with it. With most of our 30s spent raising kids, we are stepping into this new decade with a fresh perspective, and we're keeping it real about the insecurities, the mindset shifts, and the things we actively do to feel and look our best. We also explore the power of having older women in our lives as role models, share a meaningful mantra from Abby's grandma, and wrap up with a reminder that making peace with aging is so much easier when you're surrounded by people who own it unapologetically. Key Topics Covered: Finding your personal balance between embracing aging and doing the things that make you feel confident and youthful.How dressing for your changing body can support a more positive relationship with it.The reality of working out as you get older, including injuries and setbacks, and knowing you're not alone in facing them.Why surrounding yourself with people who are unapologetic about their age can shift your entire outlook. LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Patreon Book Club: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Hair Supplement: https://amzlink.to/az0kELnE6fNiV Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

341: Helping Your Kids Navigate Friendships with Dr. Willough Jenkins

Jun 8, 2026 36 min

As parents, control feels like protection. It feels like we can prevent our kids' mistakes, soften their pain, and steer them away from decisions that might hurt them. But here's the truth: control protects us, not the relationship. In this episode, we sit down with board-certified child psychiatrist Dr. Willough Jenkins to talk about one of the trickiest parts of parenting: helping our kids navigate friendships. In this episode: Is it developmentally normal when kids suddenly want to drop a friend?How to support a child with an anxious attachment style when friendship gets hard.When (and whether) to get the other kid's parents involved.What to do when your child is hanging out with kids who don't bring out their best and being honest that our kids aren't always angels either.How to handle mean girl dynamics if you have a daughter going through it.Signs that your child may genuinely struggle with making friends, and what you can actually do about it.Tactics for staying a safe, trusted place your kids will actually come to when friendship gets tough. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Follow Dr. Willough on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drwilloughjenkins/ Dr. Willough’s Website: https://www.willoughjenkins.com/ LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

340: The Summer Kick-off Episode

Jun 1, 2026 26 min

Summer is coming, and this episode is your permission slip to get intentional about it. We're sharing hard-won lessons about summer parenting, starting with the power of identifying your stressors and expectations early so everyone in your household can thrive. From navigating screen time without the extremes, to hiring a summer nanny with clear goals, to making sure whoever is caring for your kids understands your priorities around food and nutrition, we cover the practical stuff. Amy gets personal about a scary moment with her youngest last summer that became a powerful reminder of why simple safety measures matter so much. The heart of this conversation is one big, clarifying question: what does a successful summer actually look like for your family? Key Topics Covered: Abby's reminder to leave room for spontaneous fun and why those unplanned moments often become your kids' favorite summer memoriesHow to set your nanny up for success by communicating your goals and food standards from the startA reframe on screen time as a helpful tool rather than something to fear or eliminateAmy's personal story about her son's accident and the simple safety precautions that made all the differenceHow to define your top summer priorities, because not everything can be treated as equally important LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

339: Greatest Hits: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner

May 25, 2026 56 min

In this "Greatest Hits" episode we revisit one of our most impactful conversations with child development expert Claire Lerner. As parents who have personally navigated the challenges of raising children who don't respond to traditional gentle parenting approaches, we share how isolating and exhausting that experience can be and how Claire's expertise changed everything. Claire breaks down why some kids are simply wired differently, explains that challenging behaviors aren't manipulation but rather a need for boundaries and support, and offers practical strategies for helping children self-regulate. From rethinking timeouts to surviving big family gatherings, this episode is a must-listen for parents of strong-willed or highly reactive kids. Key Topics Covered Why some children are "wired differently" and don't respond to gentle parenting.Understanding child behavior — why kids act out and what they actually need.Claire's concept of the "safe space break" as a modern alternative to timeouts.How to help children self-regulate during moments of aggression toward others.Managing big family gatherings and holiday triggers for highly reactive kids.How to talk to family members and teachers about your child's unique needs.The importance of community and reducing parental isolation and burnout. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Meet Claire. Visit Claire's website. LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

338: How We Navigate Situational Anxiety

May 18, 2026 35 min

Life in your 40s can hit hard, and if you're feeling the weight of it all right now, you are not alone. In this episode, Abby gets real and personal about a difficult situation she's been navigating with one of her kids, and how the stress of it has started to feel like so much more than just "situational anxiety." Between caring for our families, keeping up with the house, showing up at work, and being everyone else's emotional rock, it can feel impossible to also take care of ourselves. But here's the thing: it IS possible, and it looks different for everyone. Key Topics Covered: What situational anxiety actually is and how it can slowly start to feel all-encompassing.Why our 40s often bring a wave of hard life events, for us and the people we love most.Amy's observation about why Abby handles stress better than almost anyone she knows.The difference between situations we can't avoid and ones where we actually do have a choice.Practical things we do to take care of ourselves when life feels overwhelming.Why our brains crave predictability and what to do when life refuses to give us that. LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast INFRARED SAUNA: https://amzlink.to/az05Rg8T8ZNO5 Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

337: Do You Actually Want to Change? Listen to This With Karin Nordin

May 11, 2026 39 min

What does it really take to create lasting behavior change, especially in the middle of busy motherhood? In this conversation, our friend and behavior change expert Karin Nordin shares a refreshing, research-backed approach rooted in compassion rather than discipline. Drawing from her background in health communication and her own personal struggles, Karin breaks down why traditional advice around habits often falls short and what to focus on instead. This episode offers a practical and realistic framework for moms who want to follow through on their goals without burnout, all while embracing a more flexible and sustainable way to create change. Key Topics Covered: The trampoline metaphor and how it helps reframe all-or-nothing thinking.Why the word “habit” may be overemphasized and commonly misunderstood.The difference between discipline and conscientiousness and why it matters.Real-life examples of what qualifies as a habit and what does not.Coaching strategies for implementing a consistent morning workout routine.How to approach changes in eating patterns without relying on restrictions.What a ritual check-in is and how to use it effectively.Why routines should stay under 30 minutes.The shift from focusing on consistency to prioritizing frequency. Get your free Procrastination resource here: https://bodybrainalliance.com/herself Follow Karin on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karinnordinphd/ Karin’s Website: https://bodybrainalliance.com/ For more information on Karin's programs: bodybrainalliance.com/change-academy LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

336: Honesty is the Best Policy

May 4, 2026 40 min

What actually creates deep, meaningful friendships? In this episode, we explore the idea of radical honesty and why it might be the missing piece in your closest relationships. Inspired by a therapist’s take and rooted in Amy’s long-held belief, we unpack what it really means to show up truthfully with the people in your inner circle. Key Topics Covered: • Why radical honesty is essential for deeper friendships. • The impact of people pleasing on adult relationships. • Navigating anxious attachment and overthinking. • Recognizing and breaking co-dependent patterns. • The role of tone and delivery in honest conversations. • Simple, practical one-liners to start being more honest today. LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

335. Our Most Common Marriage Issues We Get Stuck On

Apr 27, 2026 35 min

Long-term relationships often come with recurring challenges that don’t fully resolve, no matter how many times you revisit them. In this episode, we open up about the patterns that keep resurfacing in our own relationships and what it looks like to navigate those tensions with more awareness and intention. From communication differences to division of responsibilities, we share how we’re learning to approach these sticking points differently, including adjusting expectations, asking for what we need, and recognizing when support might need to come from outside the partnership. Differences between verbal processing and internal processing in communication.Navigating humor versus emotional support in sensitive moments.The tendency for partners to jump into problem-solving mode.Identifying when to lean on friends or therapists for deeper support.Perceived imbalance in household and family responsibilities.The role of recognition and appreciation in partnerships.Gaining perspective through shared experiences and role reversal.The added strain of parenting a child with special needs on a relationship. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Listen to Episode #333: Our Holy Grail Advice for Relationships : https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/333-our-holy-grail-advice-for-relationships/id1489878793?i=1000761069923 HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

334: Advice We Wish We Had 10 Years Ago

Apr 20, 2026 54 min

Reflecting on the past ten years feels especially meaningful as Abby turns 40 and we both hit a decade of motherhood. While there’s no version of the last ten years where everything would’ve been done “perfectly,” there’s so much growth, perspective, and beauty in what we’ve learned along the way. This conversation is your reminder to look back on your own journey with a glass-half-full mindset because you’re likely doing better than you think. From redefining rest and challenging the idea that your best years are behind you to letting go of the “start next week” mindset, we’re sharing the lessons that have shaped us and the ones we wish we had embraced sooner. Topics We Cover: Why rest doesn’t have to be earned and how to actually make time for it.Letting go of the “work for the weekend” mindset.The reality of building meaningful, trustworthy friendships in your 30s and 40s.Why “starting next week” isn’t a strategy.Abby’s journey with binge eating and the importance of starting now.The reminder that it’s never too late to change your habits or lifestyle.Honest reflections on early motherhood and what Amy wishes she knew.The power of asking for help and leaning on your support system.Simple resets, including the impact of a 20-minute break.Real-life topics like period cups and navigating everyday womanhood.Encouragement to reflect on your own growth over the past decade. LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Colorsciene Sunscreen Affiliate Link: https://www.amazon.com/Colorescience-Protection-Shield-Formula-Medium/dp/B093W7CDWD?th=1 Sunrise Alarm Clock Affiliate Link: https://amzlink.to/az0mx4hp4zKiA Shark Cordless Vacuum Affiliate Link: https://amzlink.to/az0HIXET6uL3Y Menstrual Cup Affiliate Link: https://amzlink.to/az0ocHaD6vc3l Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was broug...

333: Our Holy Grail Advice for Relationships

Apr 13, 2026 52 min

This week, we’re answering your questions straight from Instagram, and a clear theme emerged: relationships. From navigating constant arguments after the kids go to bed to figuring out how to move forward when you and your partner feel completely out of sync, we’re sharing honest insights, personal experiences, and practical mindset shifts that have made a real difference in our own marriages. We talk through what it looks like to step into your partner’s perspective, why some relationship challenges aren’t actually “fixable,” and how to approach them in a way that works for your unique dynamic. We also open up about intimacy, including the factors that impact sex drive and why this conversation matters more than we often admit. Topics We Cover: • A counterintuitive strategy that helped break the cycle of nightly arguments. • How differing timelines and priorities can create tension in relationships. • A mindset shift that can help you better understand your partner’s perspective. • What to consider when small annoyances start turning into constant nitpicking. • Why some household tasks may not be the best ones to delegate. • The difference between “equal” and “fair” when it comes to division of labor. • Why many relationship challenges aren’t fully solvable and how to navigate that reality. • The two types of sex drive and how they show up in long-term relationships. • Two common factors that can significantly impact intimacy. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Listen to Episode 21 with Vanessa Marin, Sex Therapist: https://www.herselfpodcast.com/listen/21-herself-expert-vanessa-marin-sex-therapist-all-of-your-sex-questions-answered LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

332: Let's Stop Postponing - What Every Millennial Needs to Hear

Apr 6, 2026 42 min

This episode was inspired by a post from one of our favorite Instagram therapy accounts, @millennial.therapist, titled “Let’s Stop Postponing.” It sparked an honest conversation as we walked through each point and reflected on how these patterns show up in our own lives. From expressing appreciation to making decisions, navigating emotions, and leaning into joy, we share where we feel confident, where we are still growing, and how these small shifts can create meaningful change in our everyday lives. Key Topics Covered: Letting people know what they mean to you and the impact of expressing appreciation in real time.Navigating big decisions with more trust and less hesitation, with different personal perspectives.Allowing space for emotional release instead of holding everything in.Taking accountability and offering genuine apologies when needed.Asking for support and clearly communicating personal needs.Approaching hard conversations with more confidence and emotional maturity.Wearing clothes that make you feel good instead of saving them for later.Exploring hobbies and rediscovering what feels fun and fulfilling.Celebrating small, everyday moments instead of only major milestones. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Follow Dr. Sara Kuburic on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/millennial.therapist/ BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

331: How to Get Your Kids Involved in the Household

Mar 30, 2026 44 min

After Amy sparked a conversation on Instagram about expecting more independence from her boys, it became clear just how many moms are wondering the same thing: when do you start, and how do you actually follow through? In this episode, we’re sharing how we’ve gradually increased expectations in our own homes, why contributing to the household matters, and how to get your kids involved in a realistic, sustainable way.. Key Topics Covered: When to start expecting more independence from kids.Why contributing to the household builds confidence and responsibility.The importance of predictable routines at home.Practical ways kids can help with laundry, kitchen tasks, and shared spaces.Managing clutter in mudrooms and sports bags.How to handle different expectations for siblings of different ages.A helpful mindset shift for explaining responsibilities to kids.How personality types can influence chores and participation.Why starting small leads to long-term success for both kids and parents. LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

330. Am I ACTUALLY In Perimenopause? With Dr. Mary Claire Haver

Mar 23, 2026 30 min

Hormones, sleep, nutrition… or something else entirely? When your body starts to feel “off,” it’s not always easy to pinpoint what’s actually going on, especially during perimenopause. In this episode, we are so excited to sit down with Dr. Mary Claire Haver; board-certified OB/GYN, Certified Culinary Medicine Specialist, Certified Menopause Provider, and the founder of The ‘Pause Wellness, a private medical practice that focuses on women in midlife. She is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The New Menopause and The Galveston Diet. In our conversation she breaks down what’s really happening in your body, how to recognize the signs of perimenopause, and what you can start doing today to feel better. Key Topics Covered: How to tell if you’re in perimenopause vs. dealing with poor sleep or nutrition.Why there’s no definitive test for perimenopause.Early vs. late perimenopause and what to expect in each stage.Surprising symptoms like heart palpitations, lung changes, and asthma.The connection between hormones and sleep disruptions.Practical, free strategies to manage cognitive and physical symptoms.Why hormone testing isn’t always recommended.Barriers to accessing quality women’s healthcare.A positive perspective on life after menopause. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Get Your Copy of Dr. Mary Claire’s Book, The New Perimonopause: https://amzlink.to/az0qY10JJZQNx Visit Dr. Mary Claire’s Website: https://thepauselife.com/ Follow Dr. Mary Claire on Socials: TikTok: @drmaryclaire Instagram: @drmaryclaire Facebook: @drmaryclaire YouTube: @maryclairehavermd8473 LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Our Favorite Perimenopause Products: Affiliate Links HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

329. A Reframe on Jealousy

Mar 16, 2026 28 min

It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other women and feeling jealous, intimidated, or like you’re somehow behind. But what if you could shift that mindset and instead feel genuinely inspired by the success around you? In this episode, we share a recent real-life experience from a mastermind we attended with highly successful business owners and how it challenged us to see comparison differently. Instead of letting the “small fish in a big sea” feeling discourage us, we used it as proof of what’s possible. We talk about the mindset shift that helped us move from comparison to inspiration, why personal growth plays a huge role in that process, and how surrounding yourself with the right people can change the way you view your own potential. In this episode, we discuss: What it felt like walking into a room full of highly successful entrepreneurs.The surprising common habits we noticed among women operating at a high level.Why taking care of your physical health often supports long-term success.The “highlight reel vs. inner life” trap and why it distorts how we see other people’s journeys.Questions to ask yourself when someone else's success triggers comparison.The hidden sacrifices and personal work that often sit behind visible success.Practical ways to shift from jealousy to curiosity and inspiration.Why your mindset about others’ success can either hold you back or move you forward.How getting support, such as a mindset coach, can help you break out of negative thought patterns.The powerful question to ask when a negative thought about someone else pops up. LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

328. Mom Guilt- Where We've Been and Where We Are Today

Mar 9, 2026 37 min

Mom guilt has shaped so many seasons of our motherhood journeys, but it does not hold the same power it once did. In this honest and reflective conversation, we look back on what used to weigh heavily on our hearts and compare it to the much shorter lists we carry today. From work-related guilt and feeling torn between responsibilities, to struggling to fully enjoy our kids while managing the chaos of daily life, we share the real-time challenges we are still navigating. We also open up about the pressure of meeting different needs within the same family and how growth, perspective, and practical shifts have helped us loosen guilt’s grip. Our hope is that hearing where we have been and how far we have come helps you peel back a layer of guilt in your own motherhood story. Key Topics Covered: Amy’s early fears about bonding, attachment, and whether her firstborn would recognize her after returning to work.The internal struggle around justifying time with friends during the early years of motherhood.Abby’s vulnerable admission of questioning whether she was cut out for motherhood during a difficult phase.The specific work pressures that tend to trigger guilt in this current season.Navigating overlapping sports schedules and creating a fair system when multiple kids need to be in different places at once.Wanting meaningful one-on-one time with each child but feeling stretched thin.The emotional load of managing kids versus enjoying them.Parenting a spirited child whose needs require extra time and attention.Practical mindset shifts that have helped us move from shame toward self-compassion. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Listen to Episode 12. Mom Guilt: How We’re Working Through It: https://www.herselfpodcast.com/listen/12-mom-guilt-how-were-working-through-it HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen...

327. Editing Your Life

Mar 2, 2026 45 min

Editing your life doesn’t require a dramatic overhaul, it starts with small, intentional shifts every single day. In this episode, we explore what it really means to take an “edit” mindset into your routines, your responsibilities, and even the expectations you carry. From closets to calendars to long-held commitments, we share how thoughtful adjustments can reduce overwhelm and create more breathing room in this season of life. If you’ve been feeling stretched thin, this conversation will help you step back, reassess, and take ownership of what stays and what goes. Key topics covered: Practical strategies for deciding what to donate, sell, or keep in your wardrobe.How trends influence buying habits and how to shop more intentionally.Four closet decluttering challenges you can implement immediately.Why overcommitting can crowd out what matters most.Navigating guilt around volunteering and kids’ activities.Managing group text dynamics and communication overload.Evaluating whether networking events align with your current season.Understanding “legacy commitments” and reassessing past obligations. LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

326. How to Not Take Things Personally

Feb 23, 2026 47 min

Some comments linger longer than they should. A tone, a look, an offhand remark from your partner, your child, or a friend can spiral into a story in your head before you even realize it. This conversation unpacks what it really takes to not take things personally, especially in the relationships that matter most. From defensiveness and truth triggers to slowing down your reactions and separating someone else’s mood from your responsibility, we share practical mindset shifts that create more peace at home and in your friendships. Key Topics Covered: • The connection between defensiveness and hidden truths. • Why pausing before reacting changes everything. • Separating your partner’s emotions from your own sense of worth. • The role tone plays when giving and receiving feedback. • Helping kids regulate before expecting repair or apology. • Teaching children awareness of how their words impact others. • Navigating the sting of feeling like a means to an end as a parent. • Modeling reciprocal conversations and emotional awareness at home. • How past friendship wounds shape present reactions. • Real life examples of working through friendship conflict without escalation. LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

325. What we Wish We Knew About Having School Aged Kids

Feb 16, 2026 35 min

No one really tells you how much parenting shifts once your kids reach school age, and there are a few things we deeply wish we had known sooner. The early years are all-consuming and survival-focused, which makes forward thinking feel nearly impossible. Now on the other side of that stage, we reflect on the bigger transitions kids experience once they enter school and the areas that deserve a little more intention. Key topics covered: What changes once kids enter school and why it can feel like a whole new parenting phase.How friendships evolve from “everyone is invited” to more complex social dynamics.Coaching kids through hard friendship moments, apologies, and repairing relationships.Why it’s important to remember your child’s experience may look different from your own.The impact of words and helping kids understand how their choices affect others.How to handle notes home from school and why the truth often lives in the middle.The value of volunteering at school and gaining perspective on a teacher’s day-to-day.Being pro teacher and why believing the teacher matters.Managing the overwhelm of school paperwork, sign-ups, and assignments.Creating systems at home so responsibilities don’t fall through the cracks.Teaching kids to apologize with intention, not just to avoid consequences.Why school-aged parenting can be challenging and incredibly fun at the same time. LINKS AND RESOURCES: LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

324. Staying Out of the Comparison Trap

Feb 9, 2026 50 min

We turned the conversation over to you and asked one powerful question: In what ways do you struggle with comparison? The overwhelming response was the realization that comparison shows up far more often than we think, especially around money, careers, bodies, relationships, and even our kids. We unpack why comparison feels so loud today, how much of what we see is a highlight reel, and why everyone’s starting point, values, and circumstances are completely different. From navigating career shifts and body image to friendships, marriage, and parenting, this episode is a reminder that you are not behind, broken, or doing life wrong. You are simply living your own version of it. In this episode, we talk about: The sneaky ways comparison shows up, especially the thought of “What am I doing wrong and how can everyone else afford this?”Why social media hides financial stress, marriage struggles, and real life challenges.How different values and priorities shape what people choose to spend money and energy on.Career comparison and promotions, including Abby’s experience leaving the corporate world and redefining fulfillment.Why your job might not be the problem and how finding fulfillment outside of work can change everything.Body comparison, genetics, and why not everything is meant to come easily or naturally to everyone.The truth behind our friendship and why working together skews what people see.Comparing kids, milestones, achievements, and even siblings within the same family. LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

323. Building Your Parenting Village Without Parents Nearby

Feb 2, 2026 34 min

Parenting in a village isn’t anything new. It’s a necessity for many families, especially when extended family isn’t close by. In this episode, we talk candidly about what it really looks like to build and rely on a village of friends, neighbors, and other families. If you’ve never done this before, know that it can feel intimidating at first. Trusting others with your kids, your schedule, and your needs takes time and practice but it gets easier, and it’s worth it. Key Topics Covered What it means to build a parenting village when family isn’t nearby.Why relying on others often starts out of necessity.How to ask for help clearly, specifically, and in a way that feels fair.Making drop-off birthday parties work for your family.When and how to incorporate paid support into your village.The impact of unexpected support and paying it forward.How building a village models healthy relationships and help-seeking for kids.Letting go of what you thought your village would look like and getting creative.Abby’s go-to coaching prompt for asking for help. LINKS AND RESOURCES: BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

322. How to Have Fun INSIDE Your Relationship

Jan 26, 2026 40 min

What if the missing ingredient in your marriage, friendships, and parenting isn’t more fixing, but more fun? In this episode, we explore a powerful shift inspired by a viral quote: instead of always focusing on what’s wrong, what happens when we intentionally prioritize joy and play in our relationships? We reflect on how fun often comes naturally in dating but slowly fades as responsibilities, exhaustion, and parenthood take over. Through our honest stories, we unpack why fun is essential, how to bring it back in small, realistic ways, and how it can transform not just your marriage, but your friendships and your experience of parenting. In this episode, we cover: Why having more fun can be just as important as therapy for long-term relationships.How marriage dynamics shift after kids and why fun is often the first thing to disappear.Simple questions to help you take inventory of what actually feels fun and energizing right now.The difference between fun that happens away from your kids and fun you can create with them.Why shared experiences are key to deeper adult friendships and the power of being the one who sends the invite.A simple question to ask your kids to uncover when they feel most connected to you.Realistic, everyday ideas for adding more fun into parenting, even in busy seasons.Fun isn’t optional. It’s often the thing that restores energy, strengthens connection, and makes this season of life feel lighter and more sustainable. LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

321. Four Keys to Friendship as We Near 40

Jan 19, 2026 27 min

Friendship doesn’t stay the same as we move through different seasons of life. Many of us grow up with built-in friends from childhood or college, but as we move, build careers, get married, and have kids, our relationships naturally shift. In this episode, we’re not talking about casual friendships or surface-level connections. We’re diving into the deeper, dependable friendships that truly support us, especially as we near 40. We share four key elements that define meaningful adult friendships. First, we talk about the importance of genuinely being proud of the people closest to us. True closeness often goes hand in hand with how someone makes us feel in our body and nervous system. The friends who help us feel calm, safe, and comfortable tend to be the ones who take relationships to the next level. We also explore the value of friends who celebrate our wins. Everyone deserves people they can run to with exciting news, knowing it will be met with genuine joy. If a relationship consistently feels one-sided or competitive, it may be a sign that it’s not meant to be a deeply close friendship. Life inevitably brings hard seasons, and we reflect on how powerful it is to have friends who show up when things get tough. We discuss how small acts, like following up when someone is going through something important, can leave a lasting impact and strengthen trust over time. We also remind listeners that no friendship is perfect. A single comment or moment doesn’t have to define an entire relationship. When something doesn’t sit right, honest conversations can create deeper understanding and connection, especially when the friendship is built on mutual respect. Finally, we talk about staying open to new friendships. You may not have met your future best friend yet. So many people are looking for meaningful connection, but it often takes courage, vulnerability, and someone willing to take the first step to make it happen. Molly Millwood’s Book: https://amzlink.to/az0iWvIxqfu...

320. How to Get Unstuck - Our Tips for Being More Decisive

Jan 12, 2026 51 min

Decision making doesn’t get easier as life gets fuller and for many women, the constant stream of choices can feel exhausting. In this episode we unpack what decision fatigue really looks like, how it shows up in work and family life, and why trusting yourself is often the most important part of the process. Abby kicks things off by breaking down what actually makes a “good” decision, drawing from her coaching background and education at UW–Madison. She reminds us that we’re always making the best decision we can with the information we have at the time, and explains how the nervous system and personal values play a bigger role in decision making than we often realize. Amy shares behind-the-scenes insight into a recent work decision and reflects on how she gives herself more grace than most women do when it comes to the decision making process. Together, Abby and Amy walk through real-life examples; from building a home, to managing family logistics, and highlight how two people can arrive at the same decision through very different paths. They also explore confidence, indecision, and when it’s helpful (or not) to bring other people’s opinions into the mix. The episode wraps with a few simple, practical ways they’ve each reduced daily decision fatigue - small shifts that have made a big difference. If you’ve ever felt stuck, second-guessed yourself, or wished decisions felt a little lighter, this episode is your reminder that you already have what you need. Trust yourself. LINKS AND RESOURCES: FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location MEDICUBE: https://amzlink.to/az0zgEJC7OXMu HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

319. Our Hardest Questions From Episode 1 Reanswered

Jan 5, 2026 48 min

HERself is officially six years old, and we can hardly believe it. In some ways the time has flown by, and in others, it feels like every lesson, challenge, and conversation has been earned. Podcasting is not easy, and most shows don’t make it this far, which makes this milestone incredibly meaningful to both of us. This podcast has been such a special part of our lives, and we’re just getting started. To celebrate six years, we’re recreating one of our very first episodes by revisiting the questions we answered back then and sharing how we would respond today. Over the past six years, we’ve grown in our marriages, in motherhood, and as individuals, and this episode is an honest reflection of that evolution. We begin by revisiting the question: What is your biggest struggle in marriage? Abby shares that six years ago her answer was score-keeping, but today her biggest challenge is around apologizing. Amy reflects on how her biggest struggle used to be the constant time crunch while juggling a nursing job, multiple businesses, and motherhood to three young kids. While that season has eased, her current challenge is navigating moments when both she and Drew are low on patience. Next, we revisit guilt in motherhood. Amy shares that her guilt once came from always feeling mentally pulled in different directions, while Abby reflects on how bedtime routines were once her hardest moment. Today, Abby’s guilt shows up during their busy nighttime family routines, as packed schedules often leave her wishing for more quality time with her kids. We then dive into the realities of being a working mom. Both of us share how difficult it is to find boundaries between work and family, especially when so much of our work overlaps with our personal lives. The struggle to protect time, avoid burnout, and not feel like we could always be working is still very real. We also open up about finances, reflecting on the debt we carried six years ago and the progress we’ve made since then. From...

318. 3 Habits We’re Nailing and Ways We Can Improve

Dec 29, 2025 45 min

As the year winds down, it’s easy to jump straight into planning what’s next. But before you rush ahead, this episode of HERself is your reminder to pause, look back, and reflect on what this past year has held for you. Reflection isn’t about judgment, it’s about recognizing growth so you can move forward with clarity and excitement. Abby and Amy kick things off by sharing a simple reflection exercise they encourage every listener to try. As millennial women who work hard and tend to be hard on themselves, they know how easy it is to overlook what’s actually going well. To help spark that awareness, they each share three things they feel proud of and are doing well right now. Abby opens up about how much her morning routine impacts her entire day. Amy shares her growth around financial transparency with her husband, Drew. Abby also talks about the role supplements play in her health, particularly in managing her autoimmune disease. Amy shares her deep commitment to protecting her sleep, even if it means excusing herself from social situations. The conversation continues with Abby’s concept of “tomorrow prep” — thinking beyond meals to identify small things you can do today to make tomorrow smoother and less stressful. Later in the episode, Abby and Amy reflect honestly on areas where they want to improve. Amy notices herself slipping back into the habit of rushing through breakfast, while both hosts explore their relationship with food in a candid, unplanned conversation. It’s a reminder that growth isn’t linear and self-awareness is an ongoing process. This episode is an encouraging reminder that you can reset at any time. Reflection doesn’t mean dwelling on what didn’t go well, it means honoring what did, learning from what didn’t, and giving yourself permission to move forward with confidence. LINKS AND RESOURCES: HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://i...

317. Greatest Hits: Jeanelle Teves on Being a Working Parent Both Inside and Outside the Home

Dec 22, 2025 44 min

Happy holidays HERself listeners. We know many people are busy with their friends and families this week. So we are throwing it back to one of our favorite episodes that we know is going to meet many of you with so much solidarity. Janelle Teves is one of those women who when you talk to her you instantly feel better. Not only does she know and respect that we are juggling a lot but she reminds us that we are doing an amazing job. Jeanelle Teves, is the Chief Commercial Officer of Bugaboo. She is also a speaker, a wife, and a mom of two kids; ages three and six. Jeanelle is crushing it in corporate America and has a stay at home partner. We cover both of these topics in our interview and we touch on confidence. Jeanelle shares how she built her own and how she fully embodies it. We know lots of our listeners have times in their lives where they contemplate a career move. Maybe you’ve thought about leaving your job all together and being a full-time stay at home parent? Jeanelle shares how she knows when it is time to make a change. She also manages a fully remote team and knows that for moms who are working from home, it can be easy to blur the lines between professional and mom. She shares her tips on how to set some boundaries both at home and with your work place. In Jeanelle’s family, she is the breadwinner and her husband is the full-time stay at home working parent. Jeanelle talks to us about how they came to this decision as a family and what she does to support her husband in finding time for himself outside of all the household work he puts in. Finally, we know that a lot of women can struggle with confidence at times. If this has been you, tune in to hear how Jeanelle is so unapologetic about her successes and the tips she has on how you yourself can grow in this area. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Follow Jeanelle on Instagram - @jeanelleteves Follow Jeanelle on LinkedIn Let’s connect! HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast MEET AMY: http:/...

316. How We’re REALLY Handling the Mental Load of the Holiday Season

Dec 15, 2025 34 min

This week, we’re getting honest about something we know so many of you are feeling too: the mental load of the holiday season. Even as two high-functioning women in very different ways, this stretch of the year has us struggling. Between the busy season in our industry—podcasting, affiliate links, end-of-year pushes—and the nonstop holiday commitments, we’ve both been feeling behind and overwhelmed. And if you’re there too, we want you to know: you’re not alone. We walk through the real mental load moms carry right now—coordinating gift lists, keeping track of school dress-up days, navigating volunteer asks, and trying to make everything magical on top of everyday life. So we talk about giving yourself grace, slowing down, and putting the load on paper so you can actually see what you’re carrying. We also dive into how differently we each cope. Amy checks in with herself more intentionally this time of year, especially because being overwhelmed means little comments from others can sting more than usual. Abby talks about being a natural ruminator—and how bringing things up with safe people, sooner rather than later, can bring so much peace of mind. Family dynamics during the holidays can get complicated, too. Amy shares the powerful reminder that she can’t control how other people experience the holiday. And if anxiety is creeping in, communicating that with the people closest to you can make all the difference. We also share how we balance two totally different approaches to managing the mental load. Abby swears by writing everything down. Amy has always found the idea overwhelming… but she’s giving it a try. And Abby walks through how to take that practice a step further once it’s all out of your head and on paper. A big takeaway for both of us? Choose one thing and complete it from start to finish. The more we multitask, the more scattered we feel. Slowing down and focusing on a single task has been grounding for us both. Toward the end, we highlight some incred...

315. Why Your Partner "Doesn't Get It" - and How to Reset Your Relationship with Eli Weinstein

Dec 8, 2025 55 min

We’ve had Eli Weinstein on the podcast before (episode 182), where we focused on the postpartum period. Today, we’re talking about the next phase of parenthood—one that brings its own growing pains, relationship shifts, and a whole new set of expectations. In his new book, Eli introduces the “holy trinity” of relationships: expectations, perception, and reality. He walks us through how easy it is for these three to get misaligned. One example almost every parent can relate to: when one partner works from home, the expectation is that more will get done around the house. When it doesn’t happen, the perception becomes that the partner is lazy, when the reality is that no one ever clearly set the expectation in the first place. If you’ve been here for a bit, you know about Amy and Drew’s weekly meetings. Amy is honest—she doesn’t always look forward to them—but they’ve drastically improved clarity around roles and tasks. If you’re trying to bring something like this into your own relationship, Eli shares one simple 15-minute daily practice that can soften resistance and rebuild connection. We also get into a feeling many of us have had at some point: “Why does my spouse feel like another child I have to remind all the time?” Eli normalizes the frustration. Giving your partner direction—even if it seems obvious—is better than simmering in resentment later. Think of it as a reset: just like teaching a child how to walk, sometimes our partners have never been taught certain systems, and clarity is an act of kindness. Eli also breaks down his “import and export” lists. This framework helps families intentionally remove what no longer serves them while protecting what does. And of course, gratitude comes up—Eli shares why small, frequent expressions of appreciation might be the most powerful shift you can make in your marriage. Eli closes the conversation with a grounding reminder: every couple is navigating this same transition. You are not alone. It’s never too late to re...

314. Attachment Styles in Adult Friendships with Dr. Marisa Franco

Dec 1, 2025 44 min

Friendship is one of the topics we get asked about most, so we brought back Dr. Marisa Franco, one of the world’s leading voices on human connection. We dive straight into the heart of modern friendship and start with something that influences every relationship we have: attachment styles. Marisa explains how these patterns begin in childhood, how they show up differently in adulthood, and why none of us fit neatly into one category. We explore one of the biggest questions we hear from listeners: if you tend to be anxious or avoidant, do you end up attracting friends with the same tendencies? Marisa shares one of her biggest challenges in her research—secure people continue to find each other easily, while those who struggle with connection often repeat the same patterns with similar types of friends. Since many of you are new moms or navigating school-aged seasons, we ask Marisa what to do when a friend needs more from you than you can realistically give. She reminds us that it’s okay to say no and that saying no with kindness helps preserve the relationship. Although friendship looks natural from the outside, we share honestly that it hasn’t always been effortless for us either. Amy opens up about how isolating early motherhood felt and why making new friends during that time was unexpectedly hard. If you’re in a season where friendship feels like it has to fall to the bottom of the list, Marisa offers a powerful reminder of why connection still matters—and what small steps can help bring it back to the forefront. Finally, we talk about the hardest part of friendship: knowing when it’s time to end one. Should you let the relationship fade or have a more direct conversation? Marisa shares how to discern which path is right, and she gives guidance on something we rarely talk about—grieving a friendship. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Listen to HERself episode #145 Dr. Marisa Franco on the Importance of Adult Friendship; https://www.herselfpodcast.com/listen/adultfriendship...

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363: How to Make, Keep, and Strengthen Friendships as an Adult with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer

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Podcast details

Created by: Abby and Amy
Status: Active
Latest episode: Nov 9, 2026
Episodes: 363
Release period: Weekly
Avg. episode length: 44 min
Explicit: No
Language: English

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