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Gabe Howard & Dr. Nicole Washington

Inside Bipolar

A Self-Improvement , Education and Health & Fitness podcast

#43 in Self-Improvement · 🇮🇪 #128 in Self-Improvement · 🇦🇺
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About the show

Join Gabe, who lives with bipolar, and Dr. Nicole, a board certified psychiatrist, as they explore the spectrum of this misunderstood illness. They tackle bipolar disorder using real world examples, the latest research, and just enough funny to keep you intrigued. Signal Award Gold Winner, 2024. Signal Award Listener's Choice Winner, 2024 & 2025! Webby Honoree two years in a row -- 2024 & 2025!

Newest episodes

Overstimulation With Bipolar: Are They Related and How to Cope

47 min

Do you have strong feelings or reactions to certain noises, crowds, or bright lights? Do you often feel overwhelmed or overstimulated and wonder how bipolar disorder connects? The answer is more complicated than you might think. In this episode, Dr. Nicole Washington, a board-certified psychiatrist, shares practical strategies for recognizing when overstimulation is intensifying, identifying personal patterns, and communicating effectively with your support system. Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, draws on his own experiences to explain how stepping away, pausing before responding, and establishing simple agreements with the people around him can help prevent unnecessary conflict and support better symptom management.  Listeners Will Learn: ·      How taking a short break can lead to improved productivity ·      Why managing overstimulation matters more than uncovering its origins ·      When (and what) lifestyle choices may be contributing to overstimulation ·      How to involve friends and family in coping strategies  You may not be able to determine exactly why you're overwhelmed. But you can learn what makes it worse, what helps, and how to respond before it takes over. Listen now to better understand – and manage – overstimulation. Pull Quote: “I’m not interested in my bipolar symptom’s origin stories, so who cares what causes overstimulation? Let’s figure out how to work through it and manage it.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipien...

Grieving the Identity You Lose After Bipolar Diagnosis

40 min

A bipolar diagnosis can change how you see yourself, how your family sees you, and what you believe is possible. But is it mentally healthy to grieve the person you thought you were? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington explore the complicated relationship between grief, denial, acceptance, identity, and recovery after receiving a bipolar disorder diagnosis. They discuss why some people need time to question a diagnosis, why learning about bipolar disorder is essential to understanding what you're actually accepting, and how stereotypes about mental illness can quietly become part of your identity. Listeners will learn: how diagnosis can change your identity why grief isn’t the same as denial when questioning a diagnosis can be useful how stereotypes can limit recovery Throughout the episode, Gabe shares what happened after his own diagnosis in 2003, including the loss of his home, marriage, career stability, and how he was treated by the people around him. They also examine what happens when bipolar disorder gets blamed for everything that goes wrong, why some losses may simply be part of life, and why a diagnosis doesn't automatically determine what you can accomplish. Listen now! Quote: "Grieving the identity that bipolar took from us -- that’s a real thing. Being angry, that’s a real thing. Some people think that it's nothing but denial, but they are wrong." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipie...

What Is Happiness When You Live With Bipolar Disorder?

37 min

What does happiness actually feel like when you live with bipolar disorder? And how do you know when feeling really good is healthy happiness instead of hypomania or mania? In today’s episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington tackle a deceptively complicated question: Are people with bipolar disorder allowed to chase happiness and excitement, or should they be focused on stability and contentment instead? The conversation gets especially important for people with bipolar disorder who have learned to fear feeling good. If you're used to wondering, “Am I happy, or am I becoming manic?” ordinary excitement can become confusing for you and the people who love you. Listeners Will Learn: Why contentment may matter more than constant happiness How to tell happiness from hypomania or mania Why excitement isn't automatically dangerous Why finding your own definition of happiness matters  Bipolar disorder shouldn't mean giving up the fun parts of life. It means learning what happiness looks like for you, recognizing when it may signal something more serious, and finding a healthy middle ground between depression and mania. Listen Now! “I think we have to get away from this idea that happiness is the goal – it’s more nuanced and complicated than that.” ~Dr. Nicole Washington Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official resolution from the G...

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All episodes

Overstimulation With Bipolar: Are They Related and How to Cope

47 min

Do you have strong feelings or reactions to certain noises, crowds, or bright lights? Do you often feel overwhelmed or overstimulated and wonder how bipolar disorder connects? The answer is more complicated than you might think. In this episode, Dr. Nicole Washington, a board-certified psychiatrist, shares practical strategies for recognizing when overstimulation is intensifying, identifying personal patterns, and communicating effectively with your support system. Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, draws on his own experiences to explain how stepping away, pausing before responding, and establishing simple agreements with the people around him can help prevent unnecessary conflict and support better symptom management.  Listeners Will Learn: ·      How taking a short break can lead to improved productivity ·      Why managing overstimulation matters more than uncovering its origins ·      When (and what) lifestyle choices may be contributing to overstimulation ·      How to involve friends and family in coping strategies  You may not be able to determine exactly why you're overwhelmed. But you can learn what makes it worse, what helps, and how to respond before it takes over. Listen now to better understand – and manage – overstimulation. Pull Quote: “I’m not interested in my bipolar symptom’s origin stories, so who cares what causes overstimulation? Let’s figure out how to work through it and manage it.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipien...

Grieving the Identity You Lose After Bipolar Diagnosis

40 min

A bipolar diagnosis can change how you see yourself, how your family sees you, and what you believe is possible. But is it mentally healthy to grieve the person you thought you were? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington explore the complicated relationship between grief, denial, acceptance, identity, and recovery after receiving a bipolar disorder diagnosis. They discuss why some people need time to question a diagnosis, why learning about bipolar disorder is essential to understanding what you're actually accepting, and how stereotypes about mental illness can quietly become part of your identity. Listeners will learn: how diagnosis can change your identity why grief isn’t the same as denial when questioning a diagnosis can be useful how stereotypes can limit recovery Throughout the episode, Gabe shares what happened after his own diagnosis in 2003, including the loss of his home, marriage, career stability, and how he was treated by the people around him. They also examine what happens when bipolar disorder gets blamed for everything that goes wrong, why some losses may simply be part of life, and why a diagnosis doesn't automatically determine what you can accomplish. Listen now! Quote: "Grieving the identity that bipolar took from us -- that’s a real thing. Being angry, that’s a real thing. Some people think that it's nothing but denial, but they are wrong." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipie...

What Is Happiness When You Live With Bipolar Disorder?

37 min

What does happiness actually feel like when you live with bipolar disorder? And how do you know when feeling really good is healthy happiness instead of hypomania or mania? In today’s episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington tackle a deceptively complicated question: Are people with bipolar disorder allowed to chase happiness and excitement, or should they be focused on stability and contentment instead? The conversation gets especially important for people with bipolar disorder who have learned to fear feeling good. If you're used to wondering, “Am I happy, or am I becoming manic?” ordinary excitement can become confusing for you and the people who love you. Listeners Will Learn: Why contentment may matter more than constant happiness How to tell happiness from hypomania or mania Why excitement isn't automatically dangerous Why finding your own definition of happiness matters  Bipolar disorder shouldn't mean giving up the fun parts of life. It means learning what happiness looks like for you, recognizing when it may signal something more serious, and finding a healthy middle ground between depression and mania. Listen Now! “I think we have to get away from this idea that happiness is the goal – it’s more nuanced and complicated than that.” ~Dr. Nicole Washington Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official resolution from the G...

Is the Mental Health System Broken? What Bipolar Patients Need to Know

42 min

The mental health system can feel confusing, frustrating, and sometimes downright impossible to navigate—especially when you live with bipolar disorder. But what if the problem isn't that the system is “broken,” what if it was simply designed for something different? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington take an honest look at how the mental health system works, from emergency rooms and psychiatric hospitalization to outpatient care, insurance limitations, medication management, and the lack of community support after hospitalization. They explain why understanding the system can help people with bipolar disorder set more realistic expectations and find ways to work within its limitations. Listeners Will Learn: ·      How the mental health system was designed – and how to better navigate it ·      How an advocate can help you be heard during a crisis ·      How to set more realistic expectations for treatment ·      Where patients and families can use their voices to advocate for change Most importantly, this episode isn't about blaming patients, doctors, or caregivers. It's about understanding how the system actually works, recognizing where you have power, and learning how to use your voice when you need care most. You may not be able to change the entire system, but you can learn to navigate it, prepare for its limitations, and advocate for better care. Understanding the system is the first step toward changing your experience within it. Listen now. “The mental health system isn't broken. It's designed this way. So how do you navigate it?” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, W...

Stopping Obsessive Thoughts with Bipolar Disorder

42 min

Obsessive thoughts and chronic worry can make it difficult to relax, sleep, enjoy relationships, or even stay present in everyday life. But what does it actually mean when someone says they’re having “obsessive thoughts,” and what can they do to break the cycle? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington explore the difference between everyday worry, excessive worry, and intrusive thoughts — and why that distinction matters when seeking help and choosing coping skills.  Together, they share practical strategies for getting out of the “roundabout of worry,” including coping skills like cognitive diffusion, reframing catastrophic thoughts, and thought postponement. Gabe also explains how he has used these strategies in his own life and how they helped him lead a more well-balanced life. Listeners will learn: why thoughts can feel true without being facts why making a “plan B” can reduce catastrophic thinking how to use the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique to reduce worry You don’t have to believe every thought your brain produces. Learning to step back from worry, focusing on what you can control, and redirecting your attention can help break the cycle. Listen now to learn practical strategies for managing obsessive thoughts and worry with bipolar disorder. Pull Quote: “Just because I think it doesn't mean it's true.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Web...

Trusting AI with Your Bipolar Care: What You Should Know

41 min

Artificial intelligence (AI) is changing how we search for information, make decisions, and even seek mental health support. But can AI therapy safely help people living with bipolar disorder? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington explore the potential benefits and risks of using artificial intelligence for bipolar management. They discuss why people may trust AI more than doctors or therapists, what can happen when an AI chatbot validates thoughts that should instead raise a red flag, and whether AI can recognize dangerous symptoms of mania, depression, psychosis, or suicidality. The conversation isn't entirely negative. AI could help reduce clinician burnout, analyze patterns in mental health data, identify potential mood changes, and give people useful ideas for sleep, routines, motivation, and self-care. Listeners will learn: how artificial intelligence can help — and harm — people with bipolar disorder why human mental health care still matters how to use AI safely and protect your mental health So where should people with bipolar disorder draw the line? Gabe and Dr. Nicole discuss the promise, risks, profit motive, and safeguards that are still needed before AI becomes a trusted part of mental health care. Pull Quote: “AI thinks really quick. So every rabbit hole I jump down follows me right along. For mania? It’s gas on a fire.” — Gabe Howard, host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman G...

Misdiagnosis: What If You Suspect You Don’t Have Bipolar Disorder?

39 min

Many people wonder whether their bipolar diagnosis is correct. Maybe your symptoms don't match what you've learned. Maybe other circumstances — like trauma or substance use — better explain what you've experienced. Or maybe you've simply never felt confident that bipolar disorder is the accurate diagnosis. Where do you go from here? In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar, and board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington explain why diagnosing bipolar disorder is rarely straightforward, what psychiatrists actually look for during a psychiatric evaluation, and why getting a second opinion is often a thoughtful step and not an act of denial. You'll also learn why diagnosis isn't based on a single appointment, why honest conversations about symptoms and substance use matter, and how confirmation bias and other systemic issues can influence mental health care. Dr. Nicole shares what a real psychiatric reevaluation looks like, how long it typically takes, and why the goal isn't to prove someone right or wrong, but rather to find the most accurate diagnosis possible. Listener takeaways: understand why diagnosis is an investigation that takes weeks or months — not one appointment why questioning a diagnosis isn't the same as denying one how to advocate for yourself while maintaining an open mind why a bipolar diagnosis is more complicated than many people realize If you've ever wondered, "Do I really have bipolar disorder?", this conversation will help you understand what questions to ask, what to expect from the diagnostic process, and why the best mental health care is built on collaboration and not assumptions. Listen now! Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous pub...

Bipolar Hacks to Live Better and Thrive

47 min

You don't need a miracle cure to manage bipolar disorder—sometimes the smallest changes can have the biggest impact. Discover practical bipolar hacks that can help you recognize mood episodes earlier, reduce everyday stress, build healthier routines, and make life a little easier. In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington share practical, evidence-informed, real-world coping skills that can help you stay one step ahead of bipolar disorder. Gabe also shares the personal strategies he uses to recognize the early warning signs of episodes, and together they explore whether ideas like getting a pet, volunteering, or driving for rideshare apps are genuinely helpful bipolar hacks—or whether they can backfire depending on where you are in your recovery. Listeners will learn: Why lowering the bar on difficult days can improve long-term recovery How to build your own personalized "toolbox" of bipolar hacks Which bipolar hacks psychiatrists actually recommend Why chasing perfection is a recipe for suffering If you've ever wondered, "What can I actually do today to better manage bipolar disorder?" this episode is packed with answers. "The hack isn't expecting less from yourself forever—it's adjusting your expectations when you need to so you can keep moving forward." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an off...

Coping Skills to Stop Impulsive Behaviors

44 min

Living with bipolar disorder often means navigating a minefield of impulsive thoughts and actions. For example, have you ever made a snap decision that you immediately regretted? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington dive deep into the chaotic reality of bipolar impulsivity. They discuss the critical difference between having an impulsive personality and experiencing impulsivity as a disruptive symptom of bipolar disorder. By learning to identify your personal baseline, you can start setting strategic guardrails before a passing thought becomes a permanent problem. Listeners will learn: how delaying gratification by just 24 hours can prevent regret how to conduct a chain analysis and why it works how reflecting on past destructive behaviors can provide valuable data to protect your future Managing a mental health condition is undeniably exhausting, but recognizing your patterns is the first step toward reclaiming your peace of mind. Listen now to learn practical, real-world strategies to stop impulsive behaviors in their tracks and protect your long-term stability. Cold Open Transcript: Gabe Howard: Any barrier, even a few-second one, can really help curb impulsive behavior. Maybe before you buy something, you wander around the block real quick. Maybe before you go home with that person, you go to the bathroom and splash water on your face. Maybe before you yell, you count to three. Impulsive behavior comes in all shapes and sizes and everybody's different and everybody has different tolerance levels, etc., so it's, it's really hard to find coping skills for something that is analogous to a bomb, right? It's everything's fine. Poof! Right. And now it's like, what's the coping skill for that? Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospita...

Self-Esteem in Bipolar: The Hidden Issue No One Talks About

42 min

Why is it so easy to believe that every setback, unfinished task, messy room, or missed opportunity means you're failing? And why do so many people living with bipolar disorder automatically assume that everyone else has life figured out? After receiving an email from a listener managing feelings of worthlessness, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington tackle one of the most painful and least discussed realities of bipolar disorder: the damage it can do to your sense of self. Listeners will learn: why comparing yourself to others often leads to unnecessary stress practical ways to challenge negative self-talk and self-criticism why bipolar disorder can intensify feelings of self-doubt why accepting the difficulty of managing bipolar disorder doesn't mean you’re giving up If you've ever looked at your life and wondered whether bipolar disorder has permanently damaged your ability to be happy, successful, or fulfilled, this episode offers something more valuable than easy answers: a thoughtful conversation about how to move forward without letting the diagnosis define your worth. Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: There's no scientific or medical way that you can prescribe somebody something and make them feel better about living with bipolar disorder. And please correct me if I'm wrong, Dr. Nicole. Dr. Nicole: Not, not 100%. I can't give you a magic pill that will make you all of a sudden feel like you have value and worth, that makes you wake up the next day and say oh, how valuable am I to the world? Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all...

Hypomania: The Mood State Few People Fear—But Should

35 min

For many, a surge of energy, creativity, and expansive mood can feel like an absolute gift. For those living with bipolar disorder, a hypomanic episode feels less like a symptom and more like winning the mental health lottery. But beneath this romanticized exterior lies a sneaky and potentially destructive reality. In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington break down the complex nuances of hypomania. Dr. Nicole explains the hidden risks of leaving these episodes unchecked and Gabe opens up about the difficulty of distinguishing between genuine happiness and a brewing clinical episode, providing a raw look at the internal tug-of-war patients face. Listeners will Learn: Teasing out the differences between having a great day and experiencing an abnormally expansive mood Why a decreased need for sleep is a massive red flag rather than a newfound productivity hack Learn the functional differences between mania from hypomania Acknowledge that romanticizing a hypomanic high often ignores the depressive plunge that follows Whether you are navigating a bipolar 2 diagnosis, wanting to understand the role hypomania plays in a bipolar 1 diagnosis, or supporting a loved one this conversation delivers straight talk without the medical jargon. Tune in to learn how to spot the warning signs, establish safety guardrails, and safely navigate the deceptive highs of hypomania. Listen Now! Pull Quote: “I know more people with hypomania who have gotten themselves into trouble than I do who thrive because of it." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journ...

Navigating the ‘Fear of Fear’ Cycle of Panic Attacks with Bipolar

46 min

What if the anxiety you're facing isn’t bipolar disorder alone — but the fear of what might happen next? With humor, honesty, and practical insight, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, shares devastatingly real stories — including the panic attack that caused him to quit a job from the parking lot. Along the way, Dr. Nicole explains the critical differences between anxiety, panic attacks, panic disorder, and bipolar disorder, while unpacking why these disorders so commonly occur alongside bipolar disorder. You’ll learn why anxiety can quietly fuel isolation, how avoidance behaviors grow, what treatment actually looks like, and why therapy, coping skills, and medication each play different roles in recovery. Most importantly, this episode asks a powerful question: Can panic attacks and anxiety ever truly go away — or is the goal learning how to fight back? Listeners will learn: why using the correct terminology to describe panic and anxiety is essential for effective treatment why medication is often a temporary fix and not a long-term solution how to understand the “fear of fear” cycle — and begin breaking free from it Whether you’re having trouble leaving the house or trying to understand why your brain feels stuck on a “what if” roundabout, this episode offers the clinical clarity and authentic perspective needed to help break the cycle. Hit play to better understand the science of panic, anxiety, and bipolar disorder — and learn how to start taking your life back. "Panic attacks are disruptive as hell, I mean, how many times can I ‘panic quit’ my job from the parking lot before it becomes problematic?" ~Gabe Howard, host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publicat...

Is it Anxiety, Bipolar, or Both? (And How to Tell the Difference)

47 min

It is a common misconception that anxiety is just part of the package when you live with bipolar disorder. While anxiety can certainly be a symptom of a mood episode, for many people, it is its own distinct, comorbid diagnosis. In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar and anxiety) and Dr. Nicole Washington get real about the overlap between bipolar disorder and anxiety. Dr. Nicole explains the clinical difference between being a "worrier" and having a pathology, while Gabe shares personal stories of suffering from – and overcoming – anxiety. Listeners Will Learn: How to tell if your anxiety is a symptom of mania/depression or its own disorder. Why anxiety ruminations feel like an endless scroll of negative thoughts. Dr. Nicole’s genius (and socially acceptable) tactic for escaping an anxiety-inducing situation. How to avoid the suffering Olympics when it comes to bipolar and anxiety Whether you’re dealing with anxiety related to emails from your boss or you’re afraid to leave the house, we’re sharing practical, real-world strategies to help you pull back instead of pushing through. Listen Now! "My best anxiety coping skill, unfortunately, still involves me having that initial momentary terror. But it sure beats the old skill where I panicked, freaked out, and yelled at everybody." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official reso...

When Joy Goes Missing: Understanding Anhedonia in Bipolar Disorder

37 min

Are you no longer experiencing pleasure or joy in day-to-day life? If you are living with bipolar disorder, you know the crushing weight of the “nothingness” — that specific, hollow moment where the things that used to define happiness suddenly feel like chores. This may not be a bad mood or a lack of discipline; it could be a clinical symptom known as anhedonia.In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board certified psychiatrist) peel back the layers of this often-misunderstood symptom. Together, they share that losing your spark isn't a character flaw, but a biological hurdle that you can overcome.  Listener takeaways: Learn exactly what anhedonia is — and is not. Learn how anhedonia can appear in dysphoric or agitated mania. Learn to distinguish between clinical loss of joy and simply “outgrowing” things. Learn how to define — and understand — “normal.” If you’ve ever felt like a “bad” or “lazy” person because you couldn't find the joy in life, this episode is the reality check you need. Learn why “gray is OK” and how to start the climb back to contentment. Listen now! "A lot of people don't recognize that boredom and contentment and blah is not depression. It's not anhedonia. It's not joy or happiness, but it is stability." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official resolution from the...

Can I Stop My Bipolar Meds?  Cold Turkey vs Tapering

45 min

"Do I have to take these meds forever?" It’s the most common question psychiatrists hear, but the answer is rarely a simple yes or no. In this episode, hosts Gabe Howard (living with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (board-certified psychiatrist) dive into the risks, the realities, and the honest conversations most doctors avoid when it comes to stopping bipolar medication. They break down why "cold turkey" is a recipe for disaster and explain the equally dangerous "hot turkey" otherwise known as restarting a full medication cocktail after a long break. Gabe shares his own journey of switching doctors to find a specialist in titration, illustrating the difference between "Mercedes Benz care" and trying to navigate a "hoopty" ride on your own. Dr. Nicole explains the science of brain receptors, the logistical hurdles of compounding pharmacies, and why the medical community is often resistant to "deprescribing." Listeners Will Learn: ·  Instead of "stopping" try reframing the conversation as "decreasing reliance" ·  Why lowering your medication slowly gives you better results ·  Finding a psych doctor who understands "deprescribing" may take time ·  A successful, safe medication adjustment can take a year or more—it is a marathon, not a sprint  Whether you’re struggling with side effects like brain fog and sexual dysfunction or you simply want to feel more in control, this episode offers a roadmap for having an honest, data-driven conversation with your treatment team. Learn why "decreasing reliance" on medication is often a more successful goal than quitting entirely, and how to treat bumps in the road as data points rather than failures. "Most people think stopping meds is like flipping a light switch—on Monday you're on them, and on Tuesday you're not. But in reality, it’s a slow, medical taper. It’s more accurate to describe this as 'decreasing our reliance' rather than just quitting, so we can actually see what the data tells us." ~Gabe Howard, Host Ou...

BONUS: Headlines of Horror: Schizophrenia Portrayals in News Media

40 min

Bonus Episode of "Inside Schizophrenia" podcast from Healthline Media. “Paranoid schizophrenic admits to attacking dog walker.” When we watch a horror movie, we know the “madman” on screen is a work of fiction. But when the nightly news leads with a diagnosis to explain a tragedy, the fear it creates is very real — and often permanent.Why does the media lead with schizophrenia only when the story involves violence, yet remain silent when it comes to stories of recovery, hope, and humanity? In this hard-hitting episode, host Rachel Star Withers (who lives with schizophrenia) explores the Lead with Fear phenomenon — the dangerous journalistic trend of linking a diagnosis to a crime before the facts are even in — and why schizophrenia seems to have the worst PR team in the world. Later in the show, we sit down with two media heavyweights who are using their platforms to overhaul how the world views mental health.: Janet Yang, an Emmy and Golden Globe Award-winning producer and former President of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Frank Kosa, an Emmy-nominated documentary filmmaker for National Geographic, the History Channel, and A&E. Listener Take-A-Ways: why "paranoid schizophrenia" is an obsolete clinical term that journalists refuse to let go of the startling statistic that fewer than 20% of news stories about schizophrenia include themes of recovery practical ways you can hold news outlets accountable and promote stories of hope Our guest, Frank Kosa, is an award-winning documentary producer-writer-director, and a journalist. He produced National Geographic’s “The Story of God with Morgan Freeman,” wrote the inaugural season of Travel Channel’s hit show “Booze Traveler,” produced the award-winning “The Revolutionary War,” a mini-series for A&E, “Christianity: The Second Millennium” and multiple shows of TV’s most engaging documentary series including “Life Without People,” “The Universe,” and “Game Changers.” His shows have aired on...

Solo Parenting with Bipolar: Staying Stable as a Single Parent

42 min

Are you living with bipolar and a single parent or managing a household alone? Have you been told things like sleep hygiene (as an example) is a pillar of stability, but your teenager’s late-night schedule and the on-call pressure of solo parenting make that feel impossible? In this episode, hosts Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board-certified psychiatrist) respond to a raw, honest listener email that challenges the "nuclear family" advice often given to single parents. They dismantle the crushing weight of "Mom Guilt" and the stigma that suggests a mental health diagnosis disqualifies you from raising healthy kids. Is the ship destined to sink, or are you just holding yourself to a standard that doesn't exist? Listeners will Learn: Why striving for perfection is a trap that leads to burnout If you don't prioritize your health, the whole household suffers How being real with your children can build a stronger foundation for the future Listen in to hear why Dr. Nicole believes you—the parent—are the undisputed MVP of your household. This episode is an essential look at modeling self-care for your children, setting "Do Not Disturb" boundaries without the guilt, and realizing that your kids don't need a superhero, they just need a healthy you.   "Bipolar might be wriggling into your brain and attacking something you love -- your skills as a parent -- Don't let it." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health A...

Getting to Work with Bipolar: Excel at the Job and Live Better

43 min

"What jobs are suitable for someone living with bipolar disorder?" It’s a question that floods our inbox, and the answer might surprise you: almost every single one. From high-powered criminal defense attorneys to surgeons and CEOs, people are nailing it in the workforce every day while managing a bipolar diagnosis. In this episode, hosts Gabe Howard (diagnosed with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board-certified psychiatrist) dismantle the "minimum wage myth" to provide a realistic roadmap for re-entering and thriving in the workforce. We explore why your diagnosis isn't a unique disqualifier, but rather a factor to manage -- much like a pilot respects the weather or a surfer respects the ocean. Listeners Will Learn: Why almost every line of work remains open even after a diagnosis. Practical financial and medical rules for your first year back on the job. How to transition from your couch to a worksite without hitting burnout. How to distinguish between a bipolar symptom and a normal job struggle. Failing often isn't a symptom of bipolar disorder; it’s just part of the universal human experience. Whether you’re currently unemployed, struggling with "failure to launch," or looking to switch jobs, this episode provides the baby-step protocol you need to launch your next chapter workwise. It’s time to stop letting stigma decide your paycheck and start respecting your own potential. "If the only reason you believe you can’t do a specific job is because you have bipolar disorder, I say try. I was surprised at how much success I had despite my diagnosis." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the...

Physical Health and Bipolar: How to Live Better and Longer

42 min

Studies suggest people with bipolar disorder die 25 years younger than the general population. It’s a statistic that hits like a "thump to the chest," but is it a death sentence or a wake-up call — and is it even true? In this episode, host Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board certified psychiatrist) peel back the curtain on the physical toll of living with a serious mental illness. While we spend so much energy managing our minds, we often neglect the “vessel” carrying us through life. From the 50% increased risk of sleep apnea to the increased risk of weight gain and diabetes, the risks are real, but they aren’t inevitable. We dive deep into why “bipolar adjacent” issues like diet, smoking, and sedentary lifestyles are the true drivers of the shortened lifespan statistic, and how building a rock-solid relationship with a primary care doctor can literally save your life. Listeners will learn: how sleep apnea mimics — and triggers — mood changes why not every physical symptom is “just bipolar” the truth about medication and your liver how your lifestyle choices and daily habits can rewrite your health statistics Stop treating your physical health as an afterthought. Whether it’s vitamin deficiencies mimicking depression or sleep apnea driving mood changes, it’s time to recognize that you have far more control over your outcome than the statistics suggest. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry A...

When Emotions Are Mistaken for Bipolar Symptoms

36 min

If everything you do is labeled a symptom of bipolar disorder, do you ever get to be yourself? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington tackle one of the most frustrating — and rarely discussed — realities of living with bipolar disorder: when regular human behavior gets pathologized by friends, family, and even well-meaning supporters.Want to watch TV the whole weekend? Suddenly it’s “depression.”Excited about a new idea or passion? You’re being “grandiose.”Stumble over your words or get animated in conversation? Sounds like “mania.”Gabe shares deeply personal stories about having his ideas dismissed, his ambitions questioned, and his successes doubted, not by strangers, but by the people who loved him most. Dr. Nicole explains why loved ones become hypervigilant, how fear and trauma shape their reactions, and where concern crosses the line into harm. Listen and Learn: learn how to tell the difference between bipolar symptoms and typical human behavior understand why loved ones become hyper-alert and how fear drives their reactions how to have hard conversations without losing your support system why community and peer support matter when loved ones can’t let go of fear This episode isn’t about denying bipolar symptoms; it’s about reclaiming your identity beyond the diagnosis. Because people with bipolar disorder deserve full lives, real dreams, and the freedom to be annoying, excited, ambitious, and human — just like everyone else. Cold Open Transcript: Gabe Howard: I don't think we're allowed to have these thoughts. Let's say that I was a person that did not live with bipolar disorder. And I came up with the pie-in-the-sky idea. The conversation is negative, but it also sort of moves forward. People with bipolar disorder don't get that. We just get shut down immediately, told that this is a symptom of our illness and that we need to cease this line of communication. And so they withdr...

Paranoia in Bipolar: Anxiety vs. Psychosis

41 min

Paranoia is one of the most misunderstood symptoms in bipolar disorder — and using the wrong word can delay the right treatment. Using real-life examples, this episode explains how psychosis in bipolar disorder is typically tied to mood episodes, how paranoid delusions form, and why people experiencing them often don’t report symptoms. In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board certified psychiatrist) break down what paranoia actually is, when it’s actually anxiety or hypervigilance, and when it crosses into psychosis and delusional thinking. They explain why “being paranoid” isn’t a diagnosis and how paranoid delusions fit under the psychosis umbrella. We answer common questions like: Is paranoia a stand-alone diagnosis in the DSM-5? When does healthy suspicion, anxiety, or hypervigilance get mislabeled as paranoia? Why does psychosis in bipolar disorder usually occur during manic or depressive episodes? What types of medications are commonly used to treat paranoia-related symptoms? How can loved ones spot symptoms the person may not recognize? If you’ve ever wondered whether paranoia is a typical worry, a trauma response, or something more serious, this episode brings clarity to a topic that’s often confusing — and rarely explained well. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official resolution from the G...

The ‘Inside Bipolar’ Experiment: Why This Wasn’t Supposed to Work

45 min

This episode was never supposed to exist. Mental health “rules” say patients and psychiatrists shouldn’t share power, shouldn’t speak publicly as equals, and definitely shouldn’t build a show together. Yet here we are — over 100 episodes in, winning awards, and recording our first-ever in-person episode. In this special behind-the-scenes conversation, we pull back the curtain on “Inside Bipolar”: why so many doctors refused to participate, why patient-led advocacy makes professionals uncomfortable, and why influencer culture both helps and harms people living with bipolar disorder. We talk candidly about distrust of psychiatry, accusations of selling out, the rise of misinformation, and why scared people cling to loud voices over evidence. We also go somewhere rarely discussed in mental health media: self-doubt, self-deprecation, and the reality that success with bipolar disorder often looks painfully ordinary. Listener takeaways why patient-doctor partnerships are rare — and why they scare both sides why “hopeful” mental health messaging often misses the mark how self-doubt and advocacy can exist at the same time how this podcast changed the way both hosts view mental illness No toxic positivity. No “inspiration porn.” No pretending recovery is a mountaintop moment. Just two people — one with lived experience, one with medical expertise — talking honestly about what actually helps, what doesn’t, and why this unlikely partnership changed how both of us see mental illness, advocacy, and each other. Cold Open Transcript: Dr. Nicole: Which one is the real Gabe? You put yourself down, actually, quite a bit. Do you really have a low opinion of yourself? Like, are you fundamentally like this guy who really thinks, like, I suck, and I just get up every day and put one foot in front of the other one and do the best I can? Or do you have a lot of confidence because you, almost at the same time, have to have a ton of confidence to get in front of the camera and d...

Bipolar Advocacy 101: From Political Change to Family Boundaries

47 min

Advocacy isn’t yelling, protesting, or going viral — and for people with bipolar disorder, doing it the wrong way can actually make things worse. In this episode, we break down what real, effective advocacy actually looks like, starting where the stakes are highest: your everyday life and expanding to social and political activism — covering everything in between. From setting boundaries with family members who won’t stop asking about your mental health to advocating calmly (and safely) with doctors, insurance companies, and healthcare systems to presenting in front of politicians, this episode tackles the uncomfortable truth: how you advocate matters just as much as what you’re advocating for. Listener takeaways practical ways to advocate with doctors and insurance companies without risking care the difference between being firm and being perceived as aggressive why “quiet” advocacy and simply showing up still move the needle how failed advocacy efforts still lead to real, long-term change Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, shares hard-earned lessons from decades of lived experience, including how passion can be misread as aggression, why “made-for-TV” advocacy fails in real life, and how preparation beats confrontation every time. Dr. Nicole Washington brings the clinician’s perspective, explaining how advocacy can unintentionally become antagonistic — and how to communicate your needs without risking your care or personal relationships. If you’ve ever wanted to stand up for yourself — or for the bipolar community — but didn’t know how to do it without backlash, this episode gives you a roadmap. “If you want to be an advocate, you need to develop a thick skin. Because if every time somebody criticizes a point of view, a part of your life, you lose control? Unfortunately, you're not just somebody who got angry during a debate. No, you're a mentally ill person who doesn't know how to behave in public. . .” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe H...

From Panic to Peace: Self-Calming Tactics for Bipolar Disorder

39 min

Being told to “calm down” has never calmed anyone down — especially if you are experiencing symptoms of bipolar disorder. In this surprisingly funny episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington break down why the world’s most common advice backfires… and what truly helps instead. Whether you’re spiraling at 2 a.m., overwhelmed in your car, or suddenly flooded with anxiety for no clear reason, the ability to de-escalate yourself is a core skill for managing bipolar disorder. But knowing how to calm down — without shame, judgment, or dismissive clichés — isn’t something most of us were ever taught. Listener takeaways how to build your own personalized calm-down toolkit how naming emotions instantly reduces their intensity how to challenge spiraling thoughts before they take over the difference between managing emotions versus invalidating them So, take a listen as our hosts share practical, stigma-free tools you can start using immediately, from deceptively simple breathing exercises to naming emotions, reframing intrusive thoughts, and building a personalized “calm-down buffet” of strategies that actually work for you. “And here's another pro tip that shouldn't be as earth-shattering as it is, but: admit it. Just admit that you need to calm down. Admit that you're anxious, agitated, overwhelmed, angry, elevated, whatever. Just admit it. Don't judge it. Practice some radical honesty with yourself and admit that you need to take a beat and that you need a moment. Don't try to deny it. And also don’t assume that it's because you live with bipolar disorder. You're a human with real emotions, but you still need to manage this.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Heal...

Traveling with Bipolar: Tips That Actually Work

44 min

Traveling is supposed to be fun — but when you live with bipolar disorder, even a short trip can disrupt sleep, routines, and stability. In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington get honest about why vacations can feel overwhelming, how to plan without fear, and the exact safeguards that make travel not just possible, but enjoyable.From jet lag to family expectations, from “what if I’m not stable in 6 months?” to navigating early recovery setbacks, this conversation gives you practical, nonjudgmental guidance you can use immediately. Whether you’re planning your first overnight away or a bucket list vacation, you’ll walk away with tools to travel confidently, all without sacrificing stability. Listener takeaways how travel disrupts routines — and which disruptions matter most tips for setting realistic expectations and reducing travel anxiety the difference between “I’m too sick to go” and “I’m just nervous” how to create a personalized travel routine that supports stability If you’ve ever wondered, Can I actually travel with bipolar disorder? the answer is yes. And this episode shows you how. "I have so many stories of me losing my mind out in public and needing to be calmed down and, you know, given water. I have so many stories of getting ready to go to the show, the concert, the play, the, the event, the whatever, and then refusing to leave and ruining it for everybody else. So I don't want anybody to think that this just came naturally. . ." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV netwo...

Addressing Racial & Ethnic Groups in Bipolar Care: Stigma and Misdiagnosis Exposed

32 min

The mental health system didn’t start out fair — and in many ways, it still isn’t. In this powerful episode, Dr. Nicole Washington sits down with fellow psychiatrist Dr. Leesha Ellis-Cox to unpack the long, painful history that continues to shape the experiences of Black Americans seeking mental health care. From the horrifying “diagnosis” of drapetomania in the 1800s to the Tuskegee Syphilis Study, they trace how mistrust, stigma, and systemic bias became woven into the Black community’s relationship with psychiatry.But they don’t stop there. Dr. Nicole and Dr. Leesha explore the research showing that Black and Hispanic people are 3 to 4 times more likely to be misdiagnosed with schizophrenia instead of bipolar disorder — a mistake that can derail treatment, worsen symptoms, and put lives at risk.Listener takeaways the historical roots of racial disparities in psychiatric diagnosis why Black Americans are more likely to be misdiagnosed with schizophrenia how stigma and generational trauma shape attitudes toward treatment practical steps to find culturally humble, affirming providers Most importantly, they offer real, actionable advice: how to find culturally affirming care, how to navigate bias in the system, and how Black and other communities of color can break generational silence around mental health. This conversation is validating, eye-opening, and deeply empowering. Listen now!   Our guest, Dr. Leesha Ellis-Cox, affectionately known as Dr. Leesha, is a double board certified child, adolescent, and adult psychiatrist. She earned both her Bachelor of Science and Doctor of Medicine degrees from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and completed her general psychiatry residency training, child and adolescent psychiatry fellowship, and community mental health/public psychiatry fellowship at Emory University School of Medicine in Atlanta. Since 2009, she has lived and worked in Alabama and is the medical director at Central Alabama Wellness, a...

Parenthood, Choice, and Bipolar: Reproductive Justice Explain

38 min

People with mental illness, including bipolar disorder, have long been denied the right to make their own reproductive choices. This episode looks at how psychiatry’s history and stigma continue to shape who gets to decide. Dr. Nicole Washington sits down with mental health advocate Dr. Keris Myrick to unpack the intersection of reproductive justice and mental illness — and how stigma, outdated systems, and silence continue to rob people of autonomy over their bodies and futures. Together, they explore the three pillars of reproductive justice — the right to have a child, to not have a child, and to raise a child in a safe environment — through the lens of psychiatric care. Listener takeaways: Learn what a Psychiatric Advance Directive is—and how to create one. Discover how to start meaningful conversations with your providers about family planning. Gain insight into how choice, autonomy, and care can coexist in mental health treatment. Whether you’re living with bipolar disorder, a provider, or an advocate, this conversation will challenge your assumptions, break stigma, and offer new ways to protect choice, dignity, and autonomy for all. Our guest, Keris Jän Myrick, PhD (ABD), MBA, MS is a nationally recognized advocate, executive, and storyteller whose work has redefined how we understand and reform mental health and substance use systems. Known for her fierce leadership, creativity, and humanity, Keris brings both lived and learned expertise to every space challenging the status quo and building new paths rooted in dignity and rights. She serves as Senior Vice President of Partnerships and Innovation at Inseparable, where she helps shape mental health policy and practice. Keris also hosts the acclaimed podcast Unapologetically Black Unicorns, co-edits the Lived Experience Inclusion and Leadership column in Psychiatric Services, and serves on the boards of Disability Rights California and the Center for Health Care Strategies. She is an inaugural membe...

How to Find Hope When Bipolar Steals It Away

46 min

Life with bipolar disorder often feels like a constant battle, so being told to find hope can seem like a cruel joke. But what if hope isn’t naïve — it’s necessary? In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington dive deep into the real, practical power of hope and how to find it even when it feels impossible. From planning something to look forward to, to saying “yes” to new experiences, they explore small, science-backed ways to keep hope alive. Gabe shares personal stories about concerts, silly dance videos, and even late-night wrestling shows that reignited his optimism, while Dr. Nicole breaks down why hope isn’t just wishful thinking — it’s a key part of recovery. Listener takeaways: why hope is more than a feeling — it’s a survival skill. how planning future events (big or small) boosts mood stability practical ways to document joyful memories to remember on tough days the difference between hoping and believing — and why both matter This is the episode you didn’t know you needed when things feel impossible. Listen now! “Being intentional about remembering what it felt like to be happy and starting to formulate a plan to get back to it breeds a lot of hope. Because it's always easier to do something that you've already done.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is the recipient of Mental Health America’s Norman Guitry Award, received two Webby Honoree acknowledgements, and received an official resolution from the Gove...

Fish Oil and Bipolar: Hype or Helpful?

43 min

In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington unpack what the research actually shows, why supplement quality is inconsistent (and sometimes downright sketchy), and how side effects — even with “natural” products — are very real. In short, they dig into the science, hype, and hope surrounding omega-3 supplements. Listener takeaways: why omega-3s may help with certain bipolar symptoms — especially depression the risks of using supplements as a substitute for prescribed treatment how to spot high quality fish oil (and avoid bottles full of fillers) why “natural” doesn’t automatically mean “safe” Plenty of people in the bipolar community are desperate for alternatives to pharmaceuticals, and fish oil often gets framed as a safer, side-effect-free solution. If you’ve ever wondered whether popping a fish oil capsule could replace your meds — or just help you manage life with bipolar disorder more smoothly — this is the episode you don’t want to miss. “If it's powerful enough to fight bipolar disorder, it is powerful enough to potentially have interactions. One of the things that I'm always fascinated about in the bipolar community is when we say things like, hey, this thing is so powerful, it will treat bipolar disorder, which we know to be dangerous and damaging, but it also is so safe that it won't cause any side effects or interfere with any other medications or any other organs or anything. It's like it can't be both.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, N...

Unpacking the Binge Eating Disorder and Bipolar Connection

40 min

What happens when binge eating disorder and bipolar disorder collide? Research shows they co-occur in as many as one in four cases — and yet, many people living with both conditions feel completely alone. In this episode, host Gabe Howard shares his personal journey of living with bipolar disorder and binge eating disorder, including how food was his form of self-medication.Board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington breaks down the clinical side: what binge eating disorder actually is, how it’s diagnosed, and why treating it alongside bipolar disorder can get “tricky.” Listeners will learn: signs and symptoms of binge eating disorder (beyond overeating) why stability with bipolar disorder often makes binge eating easier to manage unique treatment challenges — including why the only FDA-approved medication for binge eating disorder may be destabilizing for people living with bipolar disorder Gabe and Dr. Nicole rip the lid off the shame, secrecy, and stigma surrounding binge eating disorder, especially when it coincides with bipolar disorder. With honesty and compassion, they share practical treatment insights, real hope, and a powerful reminder: You are not alone. Whether you’re having trouble or supporting someone you love, this episode delivers validation, guidance, and the encouragement you need to take the next step toward healing and living your best life. "I weighed over 550 pounds and I knew that I was unhealthy. But I didn't really see binge eating disorder as a mental health problem because bipolar disorder sucked all the oxygen out of the room. And I was lucky, I did go from over 550 pounds down to the 200 that I weigh now, because I had the right interventions. I treated both bipolar disorder and binge eating disorder. But I imagine that many listeners, they don't realize the connection between these two." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental...

Hypochondria (aka Illness Anxiety Disorder) in Bipolar Disorder Examined

35 min

What happens when bipolar disorder collides with hypochondria? Is it even possible for someone to have both conditions? In this episode, Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a psychiatrist) tackle the complex overlap between bipolar disorder and what’s often called hypochondria but is now known as illness anxiety disorder.Together, they explore the confusion that comes when symptoms of panic, mania, or depression mimic physical health conditions — and why people with bipolar disorder often have trouble being taken seriously in medical settings. From emergency room misdiagnoses to the fear of “crying wolf” during a health scare, our hosts unpack the stigma and frustration many face when advocating for their physical health.Key takeaways the difference between illness anxiety disorder (hypochondria) and bipolar symptoms why people with mental illness are often dismissed in healthcare how therapy can help reduce overwhelming health fears You’ll also hear practical advice on how to tell the difference between anxiety and a medical emergency, the importance of knowing your symptom patterns, and why having a consistent primary care doctor is crucial. Listen now! "It matters whether you have hypochondria or whether mania is driving it, because of your next steps. If you truly have hypochondria, if you really are a hypochondriac, you are worried about being sick regardless of your mood state. So whether you're happy, sad, manic, whatever, this hypochondria persists. If you're only ultra focused on illness in a manic state or a grandiosity state, or with some specific symptom of bipolar disorder. Then it's just the bipolar disorder manifesting itself." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Me...

Beyond Pills: Proven, Science-Based Approaches to Bipolar Management

45 min

What if managing bipolar disorder wasn’t just about medication? Too often, conversations around bipolar treatment stop at the pharmacy counter. But what about therapy that helps you process trauma? What about learning your triggers before a full-blown episode hits? What about diet, exercise, creativity, and community support? These are not extras — they’re essential.In this episode, hosts Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a board certified psychiatrist) dive deep into science-backed strategies for managing bipolar disorder beyond medication. From therapy to sleep hygiene to mindfulness medications, they explore the powerful “other pieces of the puzzle” that can help stabilize moods and improve daily life. Key Takeaways how being “med compliant” isn’t the be-all and end-all of bipolar management why therapy, triggers, and sleep tracking can be critical in maintaining stability how diet, exercise, and creativity can support long-term mental health practical steps to build (and lean on) a strong, balanced support system If you’ve ever asked, “What else can help manage bipolar disorder besides being ‘med compliant’?”— this episode has the answers. “People aren't discussing them enough. When it comes to managing bipolar disorder, it's not one big thing that you do well. It's many little things. And this episode, especially the research for it, has really shown me that doing a lot of little things well often garners really big results.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and...

Firing Your Mental Health Provider: Ending Gracefully, Safely, and Professionally

41 min

Do you feel trapped in a therapy or psychiatry relationship that feels stagnant, unsettling, or just plain wrong? This episode pulls no punches as hosts Gabe Howard — who lives with bipolar disorder — and Dr. Nicole Washington — a board certified psychiatrist — tackle the uncomfortable question most people think about but rarely voice: “How, and when, is it time to part ways with your mental health professional?" This direct and practical conversation cuts through the guilt, the logistics, and the myths about “ghosting” therapists, psychiatrists, and counselors. Dr. Nicole explains when walking away is OK, when to be careful (especially with meds), and why honest communication can actually be beneficial to you as the patient. Gabe brings the patient perspective — what it feels like to doubt care, to fear being “difficult,” and some tips to tell if the problem is the professional, your stage in recovery, or just a bad fit. Takeaways You don’t have to explain, but honest conversation is usually the healthier choice. Plan transitions first: “Ghosting” can create dangerous gaps in your care. Ask for records and time your switch to minimize treatment disruption. If you’ve ever wondered whether you owe the professional an explanation, how to keep medication continuity, or what to ask on day one to avoid a mismatch later — this episode is for you. Expect blunt truth and step-by-step strategies to move on responsibly so your recovery doesn’t skip a beat. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after suicide prevention and mental health speaker, but he wouldn’t be any of those things today if he hadn’t been committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003.Gabe also hosts Healthline's Inside Mental Health podcast has appeared in numerous publications, including Bipolar magazine, WebMD, Newsweek, and the Stanford Online Medical Journal. He has appeared on all four major TV networks, ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Among his many awards, he is t...

Do You Feel Taken Advantage Of Due to Bipolar?

40 min

Do you feel people are manipulating or using you because of your bipolar disorder diagnosis? If that question hits a nerve, this podcast episode is for you. When a listener emailed us because they felt they were being exploited due to their diagnosis, hosts Gabe Howard (who lives with bipolar disorder) and Dr. Nicole Washington (a licensed psychiatrist) dove headfirst into a frank conversation about loneliness, control, and the messy reality of potentially unequal relationships. Gabe shares personal stories of how a friend used his desire for connection to get what they wanted — free tickets, emotional labor, and more — while giving little in return. Dr. Nicole helps unpack how mental illness can cloud your ability to spot toxic dynamics until it's too late. Together, they explore what it really means to set boundaries, recognize red flags, and take your power back without beating yourself up for what you allowed in the past. You’ll learn how to rebuild your life with real friends, regain your self-worth, and protect your peace — one boundary at a time. If you've ever looked around and wondered, "Why do I feel like I'm the only one giving?" and wondered if you are being taken advantage of due to a bipolar diagnosis — listen now. “The real reality is I've lost friends for all kinds of reasons. Because I've switched jobs, because I've moved, because I'm no longer in high school, because I've outgrown them. The number one reason, honestly, is because I don't have children. And many of my friends went on to have kids. When you live with bipolar disorder, you tend to think that the only reason that you lose people is because of bipolar disorder. And I don't think that serves us. I think maybe a better way to look at it is, you know, when you were sick, these were your friends. But as you reached recovery, as you got better, you made different friends because your situation changed. And I think that's much healthier than saying, well, bipolar disorder cost me all my fr...

Why Can’t You See It? Understanding 'Lack of Insight' in Bipolar Disorder

37 min

You can be living in a storm and swear it’s a sunny day. That’s what it’s like when insight slips away. In this episode, Dr. Nicole (board certified psychiatrist) and Kit Wallis (lives with schizoaffective disorder) explore why people with serious mental illness, like bipolar disorder, often can’t see their own symptoms — even when the evidence is undeniable. Dr. Nicole unpacks the science behind lack of insight and explains how it isn’t all-or-nothing. Insight flickers, evolves, and sometimes disappears just when you need it most. From Kit’s early experiences hearing voices (and assuming they were just a creative mind) to the manic episodes that shattered her reality, you’ll hear firsthand how denial and confusion can coexist. Discover why antipsychotic medications didn’t convince Kit the voices weren’t real, why manic highs feel too good to question, and why telling someone “you’re sick” rarely makes them believe it. If you’ve questioned why it’s so hard to see bipolar symptoms in yourself or a loved one, this conversation will open your eyes to the hidden forces behind denial — and acceptance. Cold Open Transcript: Kit Wallis: It took me years to figure out I was hallucinating. And the voices hated it whenever I did that. They were like, don’t do that, don’t research us, don’t do that. Looking back on it, it doesn’t make sense, but in the moment, it made perfect sense to me. It’s kind of wild to me that I can go through all this effort to really figure out what is going on and I still have moments where it just completely slips my mind. It still slips my mind when it is happening most of the time. We have a guest host for this episode (Don’t worry, Gabe Howard will be back!): Our guest host, Kit Wallis, who goes by SchizoKitzo, is a content creator who advocates for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders. She uses long-form videos on her YouTube channel and short-form content on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her content centers around her personal exp...

New Diagnosis or Managing for Years? Learn to Live Well with Bipolar (Part 2 of 2)

38 min

You’ve received a new diagnosis of bipolar disorder. Now it’s time to sharpen your survival toolkit. In part two of this essential series, Gabe Howard (Lived Experience) and Dr. Nicole Washington (Board Certified Psychiatrist) dive straight into the signals you can’t afford to miss: the subtle shifts in sleep, mood, and behavior that whisper “episode incoming.” Learn why tracking your patterns today becomes your superpower tomorrow, and how a simple “chain analysis” can turn hindsight into foresight. With candid humor, real‑world examples (yes, Taco Bell may factor in), and expert guidance, this episode transforms “How did I miss that?” into “I can see it coming—and I’m ready.” Press play and empower yourself with the roadmap that turns panic into proactive action. (Link to the first episode: New Diagnosis? All the Basics Unlocked (Part 1 of 2)) Cold Open Transcript: Dr. Nicole You have to be honest with us about everything, including, as Gabe so eloquently put it, getting your freak on. Gabe: Getting your freak on. Getting your freak on. Dr. Nicole: You gotta tell us. Gabe: It's the number one reason that people stop taking their meds. Dr. Nicole: Yes, yes, yes. Gabe: And they always report to me I just stopped taking my medicine because I couldn't get an erection. Because my libido was down. You know, the sex didn't feel as good. I couldn't achieve orgasm. So I just Dr. Nicole: Yeah. Gabe: Stopped taking my medicine. And I don't want to tell my Dr. Nicole that. Dr. Nicole: Yeah. Because she's an old lady. Because she's Gabe: Yeah. Dr. Nicole: An old lady. She's the same age as my mom. I can't talk to her about sex. Gabe: Yeah, yeah. I hear that all the time. All the time. Number one reason. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are available directly from the author...

New Bipolar Diagnosis? All the Basics Unlocked (Part 1 of 2)

40 min

Imagine hearing, “You have bipolar disorder,” and feeling the ground drop out from under you. That moment of shock and confusion is the very reason we made this episode. Join Gabe Howard (lived experience) and Dr. Nicole Washington (board certified psychiatrist) as they transform that initial overwhelm into a powerful first step. In this episode, you’ll discover the essential truths no one tells you when you get a new diagnosis: why bipolar is a lifelong journey (yes, it’s more like diabetes than a short-term infection), how to sort gold standard science from Reddit rumors, and why medications — while not magic — can be game‑changers when wielded wisely. Whether you’re fresh off your diagnosis or need a foundational refresher, press play and arm yourself with the knowledge, skills, and community wisdom that can turn this new chapter into your strongest one yet.  “When it comes to bipolar disorder, I caution you against answer shopping. It only hurts you when you believe incorrect information.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are available directly from the author with free swag included! Among his many accolades, Gabe received an official resolution from the Governor of Ohio naming him an “Everyday Hero,” and had the distinct honor of speaking at Oxford University in England.To learn more about Gabe, or to book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the Univers...

Breaking Stigma in Women’s Mental Health with Kit Wallis

45 min

In this female-centric episode, board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington welcomes mental health advocate Kit Wallis, who lives with schizoaffective disorder, for a fearless “girl power” takeover. Kit shares raw stories of being dismissed, sexualized, and romanticized simply for being a woman with a serious mental health diagnosis — and how one doctor’s simple question, “What is it like for you?” completely changed her care. Together, they pull back the curtain on the “crazy girl” trope, explore why stability truly is the new sexy, and celebrate the radical act of being heard. You’ll learn how gender bias sneaks into clinical decisions — from medication adjustments to life-altering procedures — and discover practical tools for reclaiming agency: setting boundaries, understanding transference in therapy, and advocating for respectful, person-centered care. Tune in and join Dr. Nicole and Kit for an uplifting, eye-opening discussion, because when women speak, real change happens.  We have a guest host for this episode (Don’t worry, Gabe Howard will be back!) Our guest host, Kit Wallis, who goes by SchizoKitzo, is a content creator who advocates for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders. She uses long-form videos on her YouTube channel and short-form content on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her content centers around her personal experience with schizoaffective disorder and often includes deep dives into research topics regarding mental health. Kit was diagnosed with the bipolar type of schizoaffective disorder in late 2020 and has struggled with symptoms since she was in middle school. Schizoaffective disorder is a mental health condition where someone experiences symptoms of schizophrenia--such as delusions and hallucinations--but also symptoms of a mood disorder--either major depression or, in Kit's case, bipolar. Realizing there was a lack of schizoaffective advocates, she decided to start her SchizoKitzo project to raise awareness for this comp...

The Bipolar Hack I Ignored for Years: Our Host’s Personal Walking Story

43 min

What if a secret weapon in managing bipolar disorder isn’t a new medication or a breakthrough therapy — but a brisk 20-minute walk? In this refreshingly honest and hilariously relatable episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington take on the least talked about pillar of bipolar stability: lifestyle management, and more specifically, exercise. During a recent bout of depression, Gabe’s doctor “tricked” him into walking daily by describing it like a miracle pill. Spoiler alert: It kind of was. At first, Gabe thought the idea sounded like a total scam — and he didn’t even own sneakers. (His first walks were in Doc Martens.) But over the past year, daily walks have become part of his recovery. In this episode, Gabe opens up about what finally got him moving, why he stuck with it, and how something so simple ended up making a real difference. Dr. Nicole, a self-proclaimed workout hater, shares why she still encourages her patients — and herself — to move, even when it’s the last thing they want to do. From the science behind short daily walks to the mental health benefits for people managing bipolar disorder, Gabe opens up about what finally got him moving, how it changed his mindset, and why the smallest step forward can sometimes shift everything. "When somebody first mentioned going for a walk for bipolar disorder I thought what is this new age garbage? Like, I live with a serious and persistent mental illness. Going for a walk is not going to do anything. But I gotta tell you, I was wrong. Look, I’m not saying that it cures bipolar disorder. But I can say that it helps manage my moods." ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are available directly from the author with free swag included! Among his many accolades, Gabe receive...

Frozen Truths: Catatonia in Bipolar Disorder

38 min

Imagine being fully awake, yet your body refuses to respond — a terrifying state where time seems to warp as you stand paralyzed. In this riveting episode, we dive deep into the elusive world of catatonia as it intersects with bipolar disorder. Drawing from special guest host Kit Wallis’s (SchizoKitzo’s) firsthand experiences, including moments of being physically “frozen” while fully aware, this episode unpacks the surprising complexities behind catatonia. Listeners will gain a clear and compassionate understanding of the three distinct presentations as host Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, breaks down the symptoms and dispels common misconceptions, while Kit shares intimate details of how these episodes have disrupted her life and ultimately guided her toward better management of her mental health. Whether you are directly affected by bipolar disorder or seeking a deeper insight into its hidden facets, this discussion promises to be an enlightening journey into one of the most misunderstood aspects of the condition. We have a guest host for this episode (Don’t worry, Gabe Howard will be back!): Kit Wallis, who goes by SchizoKitzo, is a content creator who advocates for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders. She uses long-form videos on her YouTube channel and short-form content on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her content centers around her personal experience with schizoaffective disorder and often includes deep dives into research topics regarding mental health. Kit was diagnosed with the bipolar type of schizoaffective disorder in late 2020 and has struggled with symptoms since she was in middle school. Schizoaffective disorder is a mental health condition where someone experiences symptoms of schizophrenia--such as delusions and hallucinations--but also symptoms of a mood disorder--either major depression or, in Kit's case, bipolar. Realizing there was a lack of schizoaffective advocates, she decided to start her SchizoKitzo p...

Never Surrender! Staying Committed to Bipolar Treatment

38 min

Have you ever felt the crushing weight of doubt when every day is a battle with your own mind? In this episode, Gabe (who lives with bipolar) and Dr. Nicole (a board certified psychiatrist) cut through the BS and get real about staying on track with bipolar treatment. They dive into moments when giving up seems like the easier option and Gabe recalls a painful wake-up call from a friend who wasn’t holding back their anger — a moment that ignited a drive to prove everyone wrong. Dr. Nicole breaks down why even the smallest victories, like getting out of bed or planning a future getaway, can mean everything. With no sugarcoating, they explore the raw truth behind why fighting isn’t just for the dark days — it’s a constant, everyday challenge. This episode is for anyone who’s ever wondered how to find the strength to keep moving forward when life feels overwhelming. “I did not want to lay down and die. My core philosophical values and belief systems is that this is all there is. Whatever I do with it, that's my life. That will be how I'm remembered. That is what people will see. Whatever joy or suffering or pain or happiness or success or laughter or connections, this is all there is. And if I just sit at home and do nothing, then I will just be remembered as the guy who sat at home and did nothing. And I don't want to be remembered that way.” ~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are available directly from the author with free swag included! Among his many accolades, Gabe received an official resolution from the Governor of Ohio naming him an “Everyday Hero,” and had the distinct honor of speaking at Oxford University in England. To learn more about Gabe, or to book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on...

Schizoaffective & Bipolar: What’s the Connection?

40 min

Why is schizoaffective disorder so often overlooked — even by mental health professionals — and how does it relate to bipolar disorder? In this episode, Dr. Nicole Washington sits down with guest host Kit Wallis (aka SchizoKitzo) to discuss Kit’s life managing schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. Kit shares her decade-long journey through multiple diagnoses, from cyclothymia to bipolar I, before finally receiving the correct diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder. Kit explains why this diagnosis finally made sense and how she educated herself on her disorder. If you’ve ever wondered about the blurry lines between bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and schizoaffective disorder — or just want to hear a powerful story of self-advocacy — this episode is for you. Cold Open Transcript:  Dr. Nicole: Some people will tell me that their voices are not all bad, and they don't necessarily want to get rid of them. Kit: Oh, man. That's a can of worms. That is a can of worms. When I was telling my psychiatrist that I was experiencing religious delusions, and I went on antipsychotics to get rid of the god who hated me, but not necessarily for the voices who helped me so much. I ended up losing the others and I think about the voices that I don’t hear anymore all the time because I miss them that much. We have a guest host (Don't worry, Gabe Howard will be back!) for this episode: Our host, Kit Wallis, who goes by SchizoKitzo, is a content creator who advocates for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders. She uses long-form videos on her YouTube channel and short-form content on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her content centers around her personal experience with schizoaffective disorder and often includes deep dives into research topics regarding mental health. Kit was diagnosed with the bipolar type of schizoaffective disorder in late 2020 and has struggled with symptoms since she was in middle school. Schizoaffective disorder is a mental health condition where someo...

OCD & Bipolar: Unraveling Potential Intersections

45 min

Ever wonder what happens when two complex mental health conditions collide? In this episode, host Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington, peel back the layers of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and bipolar disorder, challenging the clichés and misconceptions that have long overshadowed these conditions. Using humor, candor, and expert insight, they share personal anecdotes and surprising research that illuminate the hidden battles behind intrusive thoughts, relentless rituals, and shifting moods. This conversation dives deep into how misinterpreting symptoms can lead to confusion and missed diagnoses — making it a must listen for anyone seeking clarity on the comorbidity of these two conditions.   Whether you’re navigating these challenges yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode invites you to rethink what you know about OCD and bipolar disorder. “It's very difficult to have an episode about OCD and bipolar disorder because they're two unique illnesses that present in very unique ways. And I'm not sure what it looks like when they blend together. You may or may not have it. The things that you're describing as OCD may very well just be personality traits or just part of bipolar disorder. So I want to ask you very specifically, is there anything unique about OCD and bipolar disorder put together that our audience needs to know that our listeners should be aware of or concerned about?”~Gabe Howard, Host Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton...

When Trauma and Bipolar Collide

29 min

Many people with bipolar disorder experience trauma — either from external events or even from the disorder itself. In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive into the deep waters of managing trauma with bipolar disorder. They cover the differences between trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), debunking common misconceptions. They explore how experiences like suicidal episodes, hospitalization, job loss, and manic behavior can leave lasting emotional scars and why it’s important to manage them. Most importantly, they discuss how to validate your experiences, communicate with loved ones and medical professionals, and take steps toward healing. If you've ever felt dismissed or struggled to explain how bipolar-related trauma affects you, this episode is a must listen. "People with bipolar disorder have trauma because of it. So much of this is driven from the fact that people aren't taken seriously. I want to say, as a person living with bipolar disorder, it is real. Bipolar disorder caused you trauma. You are traumatized because of your experiences with bipolar disorder." ~Gabe Howard, Host To learn more -- or read the transcript -- visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed...

Struggles of Low Sex Drive (Hyposexuality) in Bipolar Disorder

35 min

Bipolar doesn’t just impact mood — it can take a toll on your sex drive, too. In this frank conversation, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, break down how both depression and mania affect libido, the frustration of losing sexual desire, and the pressures of maintaining intimacy in relationships. They cover why some people care deeply about their loss of sexual desire while others barely notice and seem not to mind. How do medication side effects and the emotional weight of bipolar disorder complicate sex and intimacy? And what about the expectations partners place on each other? This episode tackles it all — including the unspoken struggles of men and women navigating sex while managing mental health and the symptoms of bipolar disorder. Whether you're personally affected or supporting a loved one, this episode offers crucial insights into an often overlooked topic. "When it gets right down to it, hyposexuality is simple. Your libido is lowered and you don't know why. You need to follow this up. I know people are listening to this because bipolar disorder is what they feel is causing their issue." ~Gabe Howard, Host To learn more -- or read the transcript -- visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a...

ECT: Medical Torture or Effective Treatment? (Electroconvulsive Therapy)

38 min

Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) often conjures extreme images — either as a medieval torture method or a miraculous cure. But what’s the reality? Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive deep into the facts, debunking myths and exploring the nuances of ECT as a treatment for bipolar disorder. In this episode, they discuss the effectiveness of ECT, why it’s not a first-line treatment, and the barriers patients face, from logistical challenges to fears about memory loss. With candid insights and personal reflections, they tackle tough questions: Is ECT worth it? What are the real risks? How does it compare to medication? Whether you're curious, skeptical, or considering ECT for yourself or a loved one, this episode offers a grounded perspective on a complex, life-changing therapy. Don’t miss this enlightening and thought-provoking discussion.   Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: Controversy aside, I don't understand how zapping somebody's brain makes them better. It just doesn't make any sense. Are electrical currents magic? Do they have some sort of medicinal capabilities? Dr. Nicole: No, [Laughter]. Well, no. Gabe, electro-currents are not magical. But the seizure that they induce is what can be valuable to the person with the disorder. Gabe: So the electrical shock stimulates the seizure. And the… Dr. Nicole: Yes. Gabe: Seizure is where the treatment comes in Dr. Nicole: The seizure is the treatment. The shock is just how we get there. To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow...

Unpacking Bipolar Rage: What’s Real and What’s Not

45 min

Does "bipolar rage" exist, or is it a misunderstood concept? In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, tackle bipolar rage and discuss why it’s not a clinical symptom of bipolar disorder. They explore the differences between anger, agitation, and rage, offering insights for those with bipolar disorder and their loved ones. Learn why violent outbursts can't always be attributed to bipolar disorder, and why personal accountability matters. This episode also empowers loved ones to prioritize their safety and set boundaries if they feel threatened, whether the behavior stems from bipolar disorder or something else. With practical advice, myth-busting facts, and a touch of tough love, this conversation offers clarity and actionable steps for managing tough emotions. Hit play to uncover the truth and start making meaningful changes today! “The best time to have a fire drill is when there is no fire. Don’t try to have a fire drill after the house is on fire. So many people try to work out how to prevent rage issues or arguments in the middle of arguments. Now is the time to do it. Not during, but before it happens.” ~Gabe Howard, Host To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopath...

ADHD and Bipolar: Untangling the Overlap

45 min

ADHD and bipolar disorder often share symptoms, but are they truly co-occurring conditions or just two sides of the same coin? Join Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington as they tackle one of the most perplexing topics in mental health. They dive into how these diagnoses overlap, how doctors differentiate between them, and why ADHD might sometimes be over diagnosed. Discover the challenges of treating ADHD in someone with bipolar disorder and why the right diagnosis matters for effective treatment. With engaging analogies and personal insights, this episode explores the fine line between labeling symptoms and focusing on wellness. If you or a loved one are navigating ADHD, bipolar disorder, or both, this is a must-listen conversation. Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: Hey, you're saying that I have bipolar disorder, but couldn't this just be ADHD or ADHD symptoms? You're saying that I have mania, but isn't that just hyperactivity? You're saying that I'm having racing thoughts, but isn't that just lack of ability to focus? Dr. Nicole: Yeah, yeah. Gabe: And they’re like, well, wait a minute. I just have ADHD. What’s this bipolar stuff that’s coming up? Dr. Nicole: It is possible that those symptoms that look like ADHD could be untreated mood symptoms. To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she mov...

When Friends Wish Mania Would Return

42 min

Have you ever heard someone say they miss the “old you” — the life of the party, the one who could stay out all night and keep everyone entertained? For people with bipolar disorder, those “good old days” were often fueled by mania, bringing hidden chaos, risk, and pain. In this candid episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive into why some friends and family romanticize manic episodes, ignoring the struggles beneath the surface. They unpack the emotional toll of hearing, “You used to be so much fun,” and explore how to set boundaries, educate others, and navigate feelings of nostalgia. Whether you're managing bipolar disorder or supporting someone, this episode offers invaluable insights into maintaining stability while addressing the pressures of the past. Tune in to uncover the truth behind the “good old days” and why the “new you” deserves to be celebrated. Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: If somebody's like, I miss the good old days. I miss your mania. I miss how you used to be. Dr. Nicole: Yes. Gabe: You know, obviously I'm going to cut you off, you ignorant fool, is something you can say back. Dr. Nicole: [Laughter] Not if you want them in your life. I mean, if you're ready to cut it off, say what you need to say and walk away, in very dramatic fashion. But if this is a relationship that you want to salvage, I think then you have to be willing to put up a little bit of vulnerability, as hard as that may be. To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instag...

How to Talk with Your Psychiatrist: Bridging the Communication Gap

36 min

Does your psychiatrist really understand what you're going through? Navigating conversations with your psychiatrist and other professionals helping you manage your mental health can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be! In this episode, Gabe Howard and Dr. Nicole Washington tackle the communication disconnect between patients and mental health professionals. Learn why vague terms like "nervous breakdown" can hinder your treatment and how to provide the specific details your doctor needs to help you effectively. They discuss the importance of sharing family mental health history, breaking down symptoms, and offering clear examples — even if you don’t know clinical terms. Packed with practical advice, this conversation will empower you to self-advocate, build stronger doctor-patient relationships, and get the care you deserve. Whether you're living with bipolar disorder or another mental health condition, this episode is an essential guide to speaking the same language as your healthcare professionals. Tune in and take the first step toward a stronger partnership with your psychiatrist and clearer, more effective communication! Cold Open Transcript:  Gabe: Although I imagine from your vantage point, Dr. Nicole not annoying your psychiatrist is probably a pretty damn good reason. [Laughter] Dr. Nicole: [Laughter] I mean, annoy is a strong word. I don't know if it annoys me. Gabe: Fair. Dr. Nicole: I don't know that I'm annoyed when people come in not knowing these things or not being able to communicate these things. It just lets me know that I have a lot of work to do, that I have to be the one to do that education that was missed somewhere along the way. To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please see the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an A*****e and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also...

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